They don't live together and we're not having inner envelopes...

Re: They don't live together and we're not having inner envelopes...

• ceh789 member

  

  February 2012

  Could you do an inner envelope just for the people in this situation?  It's not like guests will be comparing notes about the inner envelope.

  
  

  Otherwise - perhaps a handwritten note insert extending the invitation to both parties and explaining the lack of an inner envelope was an effort to 'stay green'.

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• Ali092011 member

  

  February 2012

  Thanks to both of you!
  
  Ceh, I may have to bite the bullet and do what you suggested about having inner envelopes for those situations. There are only five or six couples I'm having this problem with, so I guess it's not too much extra paper.
  
  CMG, thank you, that's a really good call. I didn't think about it that way. I don't want to end up obligated to invite my stepbrother's girlfriend, whom I've never met, if they're not still together this fall! I'll just address it to the half of the couple that I do know.

  

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• tenofcups4me member

  

  February 2012

  I'd address it to:
  Ms. Jane Smith
  Mr. John Doe
  
  Both names on the outer, two lines, no "and" connecting them. And of course, if they break up in the interim, the boyfriend would not get an invitation. But the guest you're inviting will probably want to know now that her boyfriend is in fact invited instead of wondering for the next 6 months.
  

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• OliveOilsMom member

  

  February 2012

  Just put both of their names on the outer envelope and have the top person, the person that you know better.  Then you only have to send one per couple and no inner envelopes.

  

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• rlavach member

  

  February 2012

  I have this same issue. From reading on these boards I decided that I'd do as OliveOilsMom suggests and write both on the envelope with the name of the person yo know on top (regardless of gender). I also don't have inner envelopes. 

  
  

  My one issue is with a particular cousin. He has been living with his girlfriend for 2+ years. They have kids together. She comes to all family functions. Obviously she'd be invited. They recently are having turmoil and I believe she moved out. According to my Aunt, they're on/off everyday. 

  
  

  I decided to write both names on the invite & send it to my cousin. My RSVP cards say 'we've held ___ seats in your honor' and also have a spot for me to write in the guests names. The just have to check accept/decline. My worry is, if they're not together, he may assume he still gets 2 seats & will bring some random person to replace her. Single guests aren't getting a +1, so I just hope I'm overanalyzing.

  

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• ceh789 member

  

  February 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_they-dont-live-together-and-were-not-having-inner-envelopes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:643e768c-28ce-4912-816f-71a5cf6122daPost:afefc7aa-721f-412c-bc6c-df4e5e424cd4">Re: They don't live together and we're not having inner envelopes...</a>:
  [QUOTE]My worry is, if they're not together, he may assume he still gets 2 seats & will bring some random person to replace her. Single guests aren't getting a +1, so I just hope I'm overanalyzing.
  Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>If he RSVPs with a name other than the invited party you can call and say, "I'm so sorry the invitation was confusing but the invitation was for you and Jane, I had understood that you two were still together at the time I sent it.  I hope that you can join us anyway."</div><div>
  </div><div>Or, you can choose to just let RandomDate come.</div>

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• rlavach member

  

  February 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_they-dont-live-together-and-were-not-having-inner-envelopes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:643e768c-28ce-4912-816f-71a5cf6122daPost:77248092-36d9-40ef-a2a1-a6537153c748">Re: They don't live together and we're not having inner envelopes...</a>:
  [QUOTE]In Response to Re: They don't live together and we're not having inner envelopes... : If he RSVPs with a name other than the invited party you can call and say, "I'm so sorry the invitation was confusing but the invitation was for you and Jane, I had understood that you two were still together at the time I sent it.  I hope that you can join us anyway." Or, you can choose to just let RandomDate come.
  Posted by ceh789[/QUOTE]
  My overanalyzing mind is worried that he may not write in the new person's name and then will just show up with them. One person isn't going to ruin my whole wedding, but it would be a bit of a scramble to find this person a seat.

  

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