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Need help saying "no" to a plus 1 ASAP!

Rainbow17Rainbow17 member
100 Comments Second Anniversary
in Florida-South Florida

My parents are inviting a couple friend of theirs, lets call them "Jason and Maggie".  They have a daughter named "Carol."  My mom just spoke to Maggie and Maggie said that both Jason and Maggie are coming to the wedding.  Carol is also coming and bring a guest.  My mom said ok.

This is not ok!!  The invitation was only addressed to Carol, not Carol +1.  I guess my mom didn't know this.  Now I have to contact Carol and let her know its for her only, and not for her and her guest.

What is a tactful way of writing this?  Please help!

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Re: Need help saying "no" to a plus 1 ASAP!

  • Homemaker101Homemaker101
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Nina- are you having a wedding on the smaller size?

    If so, I think you would be able to let Carol know that your budget is tight and that it is very important to  you to only have guests that you personally know. Let her know that your mother had mentioned to you about bringing a guest and say that unfortunately you had not budgeted for that extra person and you hope that she understands.

    Some of my friends have had to have this conversation with other friends due to their tight budgets. I'm a little nervous about mine, too- as I've only budgeted for a small wedding of 40-50 people.

    One of my bf's actually made a rule that the only guests that could come to her wedding that she didn't know where either spouses or bf's/gf's that lived with her friend or family member for a minimum of 1 year.
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  • quiggels219quiggels219
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Do you have her number? I know it may be awkward but I'd call her and say hey I'm really sorry but I can't allow people to bring guests because our budget does not provide for it. If you don't want to do that blame it on capacity. One of my fis friends complained and said shed pay for a date (she's single and knows like 30 other people coming) I said sorry we are inviting to the maximum capacity of our particular room and I can't allow dates. She's never going to ask how many people are allowed in this room and then count - if she does well than she's a nut job - both of those are good reasons.
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  • Rainbow17Rainbow17 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Thanks!  I almost want to mention the card only has your name, not plus one!  I'm already kind of mad at this girl because she has a birthday party and didn't invite me!  And now she wants to bring some random guest to my wedding.  WTF!  I'm in such a bad mood right now because of this.
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  • FaithCaitlinFaithCaitlin member
    5000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I'd just tell her upfront and honestly "sorry, my mom gave you the wrong information. We can't accomodate +1s at the wedding."



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  • Gissy4857Gissy4857 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with PP. Just be straight forward and let her know it's not possible

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  • cmp1986cmp1986 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with Faith. Just come out and say: It was a mistake and we can not accommodate your plus one. Sorry for the misunderstanding.
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  • HeathirddHeathirdd member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think that mentioning that its a budget thing is ok, just let her know you will sit her with either people she knows or her family and that sice you guys are trying to give everyone the best experience possible, the per person cost is something you are budgeted very tightly for...

    its a tight spot for sure! 
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