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Wedding Etiquette Forum
LuluP82
member
When people don't send you addresses...
Despite persistent requests. What do you do? Just take them off the list and assume they don't want to come? We're talking numerous follow-ups (email and phone) over a 4 week period here.
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Re: When people don't send you addresses...
Make a pregnancy ticker
If you think it's possible that you have outdated info (they may have moved/changed e-mails, etc.) I agree with pp to ask someone you know in common. If the e-mail/phone hasn't changed than I would take it as a hint that they don't want to come.
EDIT--- I just read other responses, and if truly they aren't answering at all to your replies, then yes drop them. Its not like you can actually get ahold of them anyway.
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I used it a lot even for some family. For family that we only had phone numbers for or cousins who have moved out of their parents homes, it was our best bet because for the most part it allowed us to get this info with out having an hour long conversation with each person.
Anyway...just wanted to check what people on here thought, since I can't decide if part of the reason I want to scratch them off is that I didn't think we needed to invite them in the first place!
[QUOTE]They are more acquaitances, I guess. Boy insisted in inviting them since he went to his wedding a few years ago (before we met, and we've been together 4 years). We've had dinner with them exactly 3 times in the 4 years we've been together, <strong>so I was totally cool with not inviting them</strong>,<strong> but he thought that would be rude</strong>. They'd have to travel for us though, and I can totally see why they wouldn't want to come (that said, Boy travelled to theirs, too. But I feel like they were probably better friends then). Anyway...just wanted to check what people on here thought, since I can't decide if part of the reason I want to scratch them off is that I didn't think we needed to invite them in the first place!
Posted by LuluP82[/QUOTE]
In that case I would definitely cross them off. You aren't obligated to invite them if they invited you to theirs. If that'st he only reason to invite them, I would give that spot to someone else.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: When people don't send you addresses... : In that case I would definitely cross them off. You aren't obligated to invite them if they invited you to theirs. If that'st he only reason to invite them, I would give that spot to someone else.
Posted by xyrius[/QUOTE]
Yup, that was my argument all along...but I wasn't going to have a fight over people who we figured probably wouldn't come anyway. I sent one more email. Let's see what happens.
If you have already left messages for the people and they don't answer, you can cross them off your list. If you do manage to send them an invitation, plan on chasing them down for a response.
Just cross them off your list.
[QUOTE]I plan on sending e-invites to people I don't know the addresses of. There is one friend in particular I know will be receiving one because he is planning a backpacking trip through all of March, which is the month before the month of wedding. I understand its not a preferred measure, but I would hate for someone I want there to not come just because they are forgetful about sending their address. EDIT--- I just read other responses, and if truly they aren't answering at all to your replies, then yes drop them. Its not like you can actually get ahold of them anyway.
Posted by PirateintheSky[/QUOTE]
Do people not rent PO Boxes when they leave for months? What happens to his other mail? He must have a forwarding address.
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: When people don't send you addresses... : Do people not rent PO Boxes when they leave for months? What happens to his other mail? He must have a forwarding address.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]
Yeah, but this guy didn't move away for a month, he's constantly traveling for a month. When my friend did the Appalachian Trail, there were post office type places along the trail that would hold packages for hikers, but I wouldn't rely on them for something like this.
If it were me I would make sure he knew the location and other info well before he went on the trip, and send the letter to his parents or his 'normal' mail as a formality.
ETA: Actually since the wedding is so far off, I would treat this guy like an international guest and send his invite out well in advance so he can make his accomodations and other arrangements before he leaves.
Honestly - if they don't reply after several attempts at contacting them - they don't want to come. At least not enough to want to make sure that they get invited. If they bring something up to you about it after the wedding's over, and why didn't they get an invite? "Well, you didn't tell me where to send it."