Christian Weddings

"the walk" and nerves

We're inching ever closer to our wedding day, and working on the timing of all the details of the ceremony and reception.  Every time I think about the actual walk down the aisle I have a sinking feeling in my stomach.  I am NOT a fan of having attention on me; I'm much more of a in the shadows type of person. Other than this one aspect, I'm feeling really good about the day.  I even feel like I'm going to be able to get through my vows without becoming a total mess.

Anyone have any helpful advice on how to get past this fear of "the walk"???
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Re: "the walk" and nerves

  • edited December 2011
    Ok well considering how I had the EXACT same fear :) I think I can weigh in.

    1. Deeeeep breaths before the ceremony. Try not to focus on it too much, if at all.
    2. Have your bridesmaids pray for you
    3. Do not take your eyes off your groom :) that will calm you down. Let him know how nervous you are to walk down the aisle so that he can encourage you and when you look at him you'll be reminded of that. DH and I did that and he said that he knew I was nervous but he just kept praying for me. :)

    ETA: 4. If your father (or someone else) is walking you down the aisle, let them know how nervous you are too. My Dad walked me down and I told him, he squeezed the hand that was around his elbow the whole time and didn't let go!
  • fpaemp2011fpaemp2011 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Like joie said, lock eyes with your groom.  You won't even notice anyone else. 

    I don't like being the center of attention either.  Whenever I started getting butterflies, I reminded myself that the day is not about ME, it's about US. 

    I found that I started freaking out more when I was alone, so the day of the wedding, I didn't want my bridesmaids to leave my side.  I didn't wait in our dressing room during the processional, I was right behind them.  Surrounding yourself with the people who are there to stand next to the two of you can keep those "all eyes on me" feelings at bay.
  • edited December 2011
    Joie and Emily, thank you for your comments.  
    I'm praying the ceremony will go smoothly, but with the nerves setting in now... I worry.  I know I shouldn't worry about anything. That's a verse I'm constantly repeating to myself, but I'm struggle with application :)
    I'm not having any bridesmaids, and I'm not sure if I'll be walking alone, with one or both of my daughters (15 and 12), or with my dad.  Trying to find a balance for what my family, his family and we see as appropriate for a 2nd marriage (1st wedding for me, 2nd for him.)

    BTW - Emily, you are such an encourager and a blessing to all on these boards.
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  • edited December 2011
    I've always heard just look directly at your groom and no one else. I can see how this would work, because I'd start looking around at the people and get freaked out by everyone being there - looking at me!! AHH!!!  

    But then I start thinking - but I want to look around and see if I can find _____. Or maybe ______ who RSVP'd "don't know" showed up and I definately want to see them. There will be time afterward to see everyone. 
  • mrandmrsbristmrandmrsbrist member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_walk-nerves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:35445866-2ac4-4f3a-907d-d39288751c63Post:574a2c74-69d9-40d2-8137-94d8dff64e54">Re: "the walk" and nerves</a>:
    [QUOTE]But then I start thinking - but I want to look around and see if I can find _____. Or maybe ______ who RSVP'd "don't know" showed up and I definately want to see them. There will be time afterward to see everyone. 
    Posted by kalizoomba[/QUOTE]

    I was thinking about this, but I reasoned that I'll have time to see them during the reception. We're not having dancing because we want to be able to talk to everyone who came without having a recieving line.

    OP - Emily and Joy gave great advice! I second what they said.
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  • FaithCaitlinFaithCaitlin member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't mind the spotlight but I plan to look at my FI the entire time!!

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  • edited December 2011
    I don't have any advice, but thanks Joy and Emily for your advice! That will help me too! 
  • edited December 2011
    ya! great advice... (: I have been thinking about "the walk" too and it gives me those oh so uncomfortable butterflies. But i am now planning on keeping my eyes fixed on my FI. (: 
  • Bett2012Bett2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My dad told my mom to just make sure she smiled down the aisle, because if you smile, you tend to relax more anyways, even if it's "forced" at first... so she did just that, even though she was super nervous walking down the aisle. She watched him the whole time, and he was nervous too- so nervous, that can you guess it? he didn't smile! Passport photo-ish.  She teases him to this day about that :P
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