June 2012 Weddings

My First RSVP "Uh Oh"

I've been really lucky with RSVPs, since we've only invited close friends and family. I got my first RSVP this morning with someone adding uninvited guests to their RSVP. My FMIL wanted to invite a few friends, and among them was her close friend (and her SO). I got their RSVP back today and they're bringing 2 extra people. They're older, so I know their children are grown so I have no idea who these 2 could be. We don't even really know them, let alone whoever they've added.

A phone call to FMIL to investigate is pending (she's working), but now I honestly feel like I can relate to the multitude of RSVP issues that have been posted on the board over the last month.

I think we'll probably just accommodate them, since it's not like my dad's side of the family wants to celebrate with us and we haven't had any others RSVP like this.

Link to backstory on dad's family:
http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_why-does-my-fathers-family-have-to-make-it-clear-that-im-not-one-of-them-venting-ridic-long
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Re: My First RSVP "Uh Oh"

  • I think if you have room and can financially have them then do it but if not, they will need to be called and explained why their guests cannot attend. 

    I had a few people add others that I have no idea who they are.  Since some people can't make it I'm letting the extra people stay though.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_my-first-rsvp-uh-oh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4dd85d7e-c225-4d3b-a148-986297301de7Post:2e8be877-5fe8-4c95-b836-f2c20a613ee6">Re: My First RSVP "Uh Oh"</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think if you have room and can financially have them then do it but if not, they will need to be called and explained why their guests cannot attend.  <strong>I had a few people add others that I have no idea who they are.  Since some people can't make it I'm letting the extra people stay though.
    </strong>Posted by MMRoberts11[/QUOTE]

    we had this happen to us too
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  • We have had people try to add but we had to call them and tell them no they can't bring extra guests.
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  • Luckily, we are using a website that allowed us to set the maximum number for each guest, so they can't just RSVP for more people. But that also means we've had to field calls of friends wanting to bring their new girlfriends and things like that. We've said yes to 5 people, but we have started saying no, as I really don't want people I don't care about at the wedding. Maybe it's harsh, but the way I look at it is that if people can't survive an evening going stag (when they know all of the other people there), then they don't need to come.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_my-first-rsvp-uh-oh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4dd85d7e-c225-4d3b-a148-986297301de7Post:64196468-c28f-4205-816d-221d87f28d46">Re: My First RSVP "Uh Oh"</a>:
    [QUOTE]Luckily, we are using a website that allowed us to set the maximum number for each guest, so they can't just RSVP for more people. But that also means we've had to field calls of friends wanting to bring their new girlfriends and things like that. We've said yes to 5 people, but we have started saying no, as I really don't want people I don't care about at the wedding. Maybe it's harsh, but the way I look at it is that if people can't survive an evening going stag (when they know all of the other people there), then they don't need to come.
    Posted by abbitha7[/QUOTE]

    What website did you use?  I'm worried that people will be unfamiliar with replying through a website.  I'm afraid they'll rsvp on the website for themselves and then show up with extra people anyway. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_my-first-rsvp-uh-oh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4dd85d7e-c225-4d3b-a148-986297301de7Post:1d42a71b-3904-4915-be46-8f6598a2f528">Re: My First RSVP "Uh Oh"</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: My First RSVP "Uh Oh" : What website did you use?  I'm worried that people will be unfamiliar with replying through a website.  I'm afraid they'll rsvp on the website for themselves and then show up with extra people anyway. 
    Posted by star623[/QUOTE]

    We use <a href="http://www.weddingtracker.com" rel="nofollow">www.weddingtracker.com</a> and it works pretty well. Our guest list is small so we have been able to take emails, texts, phone calls, and FB messages as RSVPs, especially as we are getting down to the wire. I would definitely recommend using a website because it's easier to keep track of! Just be aware that there will be some people who either do not get using a website, or do not RSVP on time, though I assume that's normal for any type of RSVP.

    Fortunately for us, we are only having family and close friends at the wedding, so we're not expecting people to show up with uninvited guests. Sadly, I would think though that if someone is going to be rude enough to bring extra people, they will do it regardless of how you have them RSVP. :\
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