I messaged that we only need 4 people to RSVP since today is our RSVP date on the invites to one of my BM's and she's like "what?" I said we have 4 people that need to rsvp. She says "we are in the wedding party". I go yah... I'm saying out of our guest list we only need 4 more people to rsvp.. .....SERIOUSLY HOW THE F IS SHE NOT ABLE TO UNDERSTAND THAT?
VENT: From the beginning she has been an odd ball. Since FI added a GM one of his buddies from the marines I needed to pick up a BM. She is FI best mans gf. So I asked her if she would want to be one. This was back in December. She said No that she couldnt afford it. Then replied NVM that she would love to.
In March I have all my BM go dress shopping together. I messaged her letting her know the date I scheduled. She replies that if she could just go by herself. I said I would really like her to be there. So 6 out of 7 were able to attend. She showed up 30 minutes late and had a list for the consultant at davids bridal. The note consisted of 15 dresses. She only wanted to try on the ones that were on sale. I understand that obviously she stated previously money was tight. So she tries on only 4 dresses. Every picture I have of her in a dress is a sad face. She was also not fond that everyone would have to alternate the dressing room. Nobody else complained about this and nobody else had price issues. Needless to say she doesn't buy anything and buys a swatch and insists she is going to find a dress somewhere else. BM dresses are Apple Red. Its not just any simple red color. I also had other BM buy swatches and look elsewhere. Nobody found a dress outside davids bridal that matched the color. But somehow this BM did. I have only seen the dress in pictures and going to have to take her word that it matches the swatch.
Next issue, My FSIL and Matron of honor are hosting my shower and bach party and send her an invite. She messages me and asks why I chose the bar i chose to have my bach party there? I said its my fav bar its where FI and I met. She then makes a remark about why not go to tahoe or reno for the weekend? I said because everyone I know is very tight on the money and I rather have everyone in my bridal party there then not be able to go because of expenses. She then tells me that she wont be attending my shower or my party because she will not be in town and will be house sitting for her parents. THEN WHY BRING UP THE BAR IM GOING TO??? Previously to all this drama went down between my sister and I. BM and I had a conversation that she thinks its stupid people have bridal and baby showers. She doesn't understand why she should have to buy people a gift for making a life choice. She also did not attend our baby shower last year.
Next issue, I have my hair and make up trial and I send her the pictures along with all my BM to show them. She replied with "cool". Just cool nothing else. I then send my BM the information and pricing to have their hair and make up done by the salon if they wish. She replies back with "Is any of this required?" I simply say it was a suggestion. After looking into my budget I decided why buy everyone a bunch of gifts when I can just pay for everyones hair and make up. So I remessaged her and told her that I would gift this to the BMs. She said she only wants hair. Ok.
Weeks go by and I try to chit chat with her on FB saying hey how are you how are things going and I get no response or one worded responses like good, thanks, cool.
I dont know if she is just not into wedding chat or if there is something Ive done. I dont know how to approach the situation because if its just me making things up in my head I dont want to cause any drama. But when I talk about the things she has said or does to my other BMs they all agree she is being weird. None of them are personally friends of her and know her through her BF or through myself.
This is also the same person who threw her apple to apples cards down and stromed off upstairs because she didnt like that a girl that we were playing with was a bit intoxicated and was chit chatting more then playing at FI and I's christmas ugly sweater party last year. I confronted her on this a few days after and was like wtf happend? Even the drunk girl days later was like wtf is up her butt?
FI isnt sure what I should do either. He doesnt want to rock the boat but he does know what has been going on and how I have been feeling. He suggested that he would talk to best man but i opted out of that idea because I am honestly too afraid of drama weeks before the wedding.
Sorry for all the spelling errors or if some parts dont make sense. Im just really upset over this whole situation. petty and stupid.
