Tues night questions :

Resa77 · October 2012

Feel free to add some of your own!

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?
2. Are you very involved with your church?

Resa77 · October 2012

1. I do have lots of Catholic friends, though some are more nominally Catholic than others. Some are pretty devout, some are kinda semiCatholic love and respect the Church, but maybe don't attend Mass each Sunday or maybe use BC, etc, some don't practice at all and don't pretend to. 2. I used to be very involved, but as my career has grown, I pretty much attend Mass/go to confession there and that's it. I would like to increase my involvement, though.

professorscience · October 2012

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?

We do, though I think we are among the most devout. A lot of our friends in Texas identified as Catholic. Fewer of our friends here in Oklahoma.
2. Are you very involved with your church?

Somewhat. We've been away from home so much it's been hard, but I've started trying to make women's group every month.

Ashl07 · October 2012

1) No we don't. Our Catholic neighbors are our only Catholic friends and they are an older couple. We would love more Catholic friends, but we haven't met any yet. The area where we live has a lot of Baptist families. In fact the only practicing Catholic in our family is my mother. She is extremely devout, and her severely strong ties to church is what helped lead me to leave the church for some time. She doesn't quite know how to balance the other parts of her life with the Catholic faith. I think there needs to be a balance with other responsibilities in life.

2) We are not super involved, but we are also recently back in the faith. My husband is much more involved than I am, but I also can't quite be as involved because i have two children who are with me pretty much 24/7 which limits my abilities at the moment.

bibliophile2010 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_tues-night-questions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d87e9332-aca8-4f8c-93e0-1a8e07e226f3Post:58929650-6271-4b7c-90af-41e9f8ab2f57">Tues night questions :</a>:
[QUOTE]Feel free to add some of your own! 1. Do you have many Catholic friends? 2. Are you very involved with your church?
Posted by Resa77[/QUOTE]

1. I would say that most of our friends are Catholic, though, of course, some are not. We're among the most orthodox, for sure. We're also the first to have kids, so we're sort of in transition in that sense.

2. We're in the process of switching parishes -- we have been regularly attending a new parish, but still feel somewhat reluctant to call it "our" parish, re-register, etc. We were both super-involved at our old parish. I served as EMHC and sacristan, so I was pretty active. I've been doing stuff with a mom's group at the new parish, so I'm feeling more a part of the new community.

itzMS · October 2012

Fun questions ! :-)

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?

Surprisngly, no. DH & I are both cradle Catholics. I even went to Catholic grade school and a Catholic high school. Many of our friends have fallen away from religion in general and consider themselves "spiritual" if anything.

2. Are you very involved with your church?

I think we will be in the future. Our current parish is very established, and does not have a grade school. So the parish is a bit older/less activities. The other parish in our town has lots of young families due to the grade school being a part of it. We'll be more involved in the youth programs at the point if/when we have children. We would like to be a "sponsor couple" as well once we've been married a few years.

Resa77 · October 2012

itzMS, H and I would like to be a sponsor couple, too! When we met with ours, at the end they told us we should consider it. Maybe they say that to everybody, but we took it to heart anyway.

professorscience · October 2012

Oh yeah, I really hope we get a chance to be a sponsor couple. I really, really loved ours so I'd love to "pay it forward."

erin5286 · October 2012

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?
Not many, outside of our siblings/family members. I have a few friends who are Catholic, but aren't particularly devout or strict about it.

2. Are you very involved with your church?
Not at this point - we aren't registered members yet even, we wanted to wait until after the wedding. I hope we can become more involved in the future, but neither of us are really much for joining groups/committees or that sort of thing, so we'll see.

For those of you who had sponsor couples - what was that process like? How often did you meet? What did you discuss with them? We didn't have a sponsor couple in our marriage prep process at all, so I'm just curious about it.

Resa77 · October 2012

We met with our sponsor couple, at their house, once to go over the FOCCUS inventory. It took probably 3 hours total. We went over any areas that we disagreed on, and then talked about marriage in general, parenting, etc.

bibliophile2010 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_tues-night-questions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d87e9332-aca8-4f8c-93e0-1a8e07e226f3Post:07bcc33f-be46-4629-8394-5392378f0b78">Re: Tues night questions :</a>:
[QUOTE]1. Do you have many Catholic friends? Not many, outside of our siblings/family members. I have a few friends who are Catholic, but aren't particularly devout or strict about it. 2. Are you very involved with your church? Not at this point - we aren't registered members yet even, we wanted to wait until after the wedding. I hope we can become more involved in the future, but neither of us are really much for joining groups/committees or that sort of thing, so we'll see. For those of you who had sponsor couples - what was that process like? How often did you meet? What did you discuss with them? We didn't have a sponsor couple in our marriage prep process at all, so I'm just curious about it.
Posted by erin5286[/QUOTE]

In that case, I would say don't join stuff, do stuff. Volunteer at a soup kitchen or shelter or 40 Days for Life group. Become an EMHC or a reader or fill some other ministerial need. Go to parish events. It feels much more natural. I know, because I'm not a joiner either, but getting involved with doing stuff at church has been a great decision for me over the years.

Eventually, I want to teach NFP, RCIA (well, be a team member), and CCD. I would certainly be a sponsor couple down the road if asked. Plus, I'm sure I'll end up helping with other youth stuff when C gets older.

mcda04 · October 2012

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?
I don't. Most of my brothers and sisters have converted to protestant denominations and I'm one of the only one practicing the Catholic faith. What i've gathered from my family is that they've converted because of the Catholic community and how it's so dispersed.

2. Are you very involved with your church?
Yes. I'm currently enrolled in the confirmation classes at my church and we've participated in the Marriage Retreat in order to receive our Marriage Sacrament. We had a convalidation ceremony and now i'm looking forward to become a sponsor couple, both of my kids have been baptized in the Church and they'll be enrolled in Cathecism next year.
We've only been involved with our church since early this year when we started our marriage prep classes, our relationship is better than ever.....

professorscience · October 2012

For those of you who had sponsor couples - what was that process like? How often did you meet? What did you discuss with them? We didn't have a sponsor couple in our marriage prep process at all, so I'm just curious about it.

We met with ours once to go over our FOCCUS, then they had us out to dinner once, but that was after our wedding.

itzMS · October 2012

For those of you who had sponsor couples - what was that process like? How often did you meet? What did you discuss with them? We didn't have a sponsor couple in our marriage prep process at all, so I'm just curious about it.

We actually had a poor experience with our sponsor couple, which is why DH & I would like to eventually become a sponsor couple.

Anyone who has taken the FOCCUS can attest to the fact that there are some very...personal...questions on the survey. For example: "I anticipate feeling uneasy being naked in front of my partner", etc. DH & I actually discussed ahead of time and opted to not even answer those types questions on the FOCCUS test. We didn't feel that our opinions on those questions were any business of anyone but us.

We asked the sponsor couple upfront prior to starting the FOCCUS review discussion to not provide any "marital relations" comments or advice as DH & I decided that was a personal/private matter. The sponsor couple still pried into our personal lives and offered unsolicted advice, which made DH & I very uncomfortable. We wanted the discussion to be more faith based, but it didn't go that way.

Our experience is certainly unusual, from what I've heard.

monkeysip · October 2012

1. Do you have many Catholic friends?

Not at all, and no Catholic family either. We don't really have many friends at all, period, and only a couple Catholic ones. It's going to be a very short communion line at our wedding

We just don't seem to ever have time to make friends or hang out with the friends we have. And we don't know anyone at our parish.

2. Are you very involved with your church?

Not at all... our parish is very traditionalist, so there are few "roles" for the laity. We have no EMHCs and only one or two men who do the readings ever (and sometimes it's just the deacons). Since it's a small parish, there's also not many groups to join at the Church. And it doesn't help that our parish is 40 minutes away. So it's basically just sunday mass, and that's it. We are disappointed by that, but we chose it because we couldn't stand the modernism of the more local churches. Liturgical abuse was becoming a serious problem. We're kind of regretting our decision now, but since we've already registered there and already having our wedding there, we're committed to it at least for a while longer. There's no reasonable prospect of moving closer either, so we'll have to figure out either some way to get involved with our current parish or find a different one in a couple years. I've always liked the idea of being involved in a parish, but FI is extremely anti-social, and I've become more anti-social over the years, so it's hard to make that step to meet people and get involved.

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