OK So let me start by saying that my Dad and I are just now (probably the last year or so) have been on speaking terms. Didn't talk to him for about 12 years and was never particularly close to his side of the family (my mom is walking me down the aisle if you didn't know, no need to pretend my dad was actually a good father on my wedding day haha). But whenever I am invited to something from his family I try to go to it. So my Aunt invited me to her wedding. Well this is where it starts she invited my mother and myself (I don't know why but everyone tends to think that i can't do anything without my mom, hello I'm 22, graduated from college, have a full time job with a salary, bills I pay and have been living with FI for 2 years ugh) but yeah FI's name was no where to be found. I wasn't super annoyed about it but I did think it was rude since I know you aren't suppost to split up a couple.
I talked to her about it and she said of course he can come she meant to invite him anyway (I was so conflicted about talking to her about it because I didn't want to seem invitation grabby but honestly I wouldn't have gone if FI wasn't invited). So we get to the ceremony (which ceremony and reception are in the same place). We sign the guest book (which their guest book attendant was useless I need to make sure mine actually knows what to do lol) and then there was a line to put presents onto their gift table (which was really strange to me since this was the ceremony. Don't you normally put the gift on the gift table at the reception, whatever haha). Back tracking the guest book had no where to put an address which I also thought was weird. When I put the gift down on the table there were 3 people sitting behind it a lady gave me some paper thing and when I sat down I realized it was a thank you note. Ugh now I am not one who is particularly stict on wedding etiquette (of course I don't want to offend anyone but some things are seriously outdated), but really a typed thank you note? You couldn't even take the time to write thank you notes to your guest who made time and spent money to come to your wedding. I just never had this happen before (i guess it's better than my friends wedding where I never saw a thank you for the gift I got her
).
Her ceremony was actually different than I thought it would be. My Dads side of the family is very very very religious. Like go to church at 5am on sunday and don't leave until 11pm religous. So needless to say I thought this was going to be a typical evangelical wedding. Boy was I wrong. I actually loved her ceremony. It was quick but still special and I thought she looked absolutley beautiful and I loved her dress. There a few hiccups though. Idk if they had a Reheasal but it sure seemed like they didn't since the ushers had no idea what they were doing and no one was walking down the aisle at the same pace. It just looked un-uniform, that is until my aunt came out she was right on point.
Now this is where I start to really cringe. My other Aunt was the DOC for the wedding. She makes an announcement that goes "If you did not RSVP please exit the bulding out of the side door, If you did RSVP please make your way to the receiving line and then to the reception room. You must have your name checked and get your RSVP tickets". My mouth literally fell open (FI said I need to get a poker face becasue everything I was thinking just came across my face the whole night). I get that when people do not RSVP and show up it is rude and annoying but making an announcement telling them they can leave was equally rude. It just made it super awkward for the people who didn't RSVP and you knew who they were because they were all leaving while we were shaking the hands of the bride and groom and the WP. Idk I just felt weird about the whole thing.
I also thought the checklist for the names was so weird. I mean I get it for celebrity weddings for safety and security reasons and stuff but Idk it just seemed more like I was trying to enter a club than a wedding. She did not have a seating chart. Now I am a HUGE fan of seating charts if you are going to have a formal wedding, even if you are doing buffet ( I think casual weddings it's not so much of an issue but a wedding where there are 200 people and it's an evening formal wedding needs a seating chart) or whatever. I had no idea where to sit and it made for chaos. FI and I finally found a table in the back of the room and we sat with a really nice couple, the wife works with my Aunt and just loves her so it was really fun to hear work stories and stuff. The food was ehh. I know my Aunt and new Uncle don't have much money which is absolutley fine. And the chicken was actually pretty good (and huge I couldn't finish all of it) the issue I had was with the cheese, veggie and fruit display. They were all on one round table and 200 guest were trying to get food off of it. This made for even more chaos. And to be honest there wasn't enough cheese, veggies or fruit to feed everyone. I think maybe 100 people got this, was just strange to me and I hate when weddings run out of food before everyone can get something which was the number one thing I told my caterer.
Now the big thing I had an issue with was the Cash Bar. I didn't realize I didn't like them until her wedding since I had never been to a wedding with a cash bar. But everything was at the cash bar not just alcohol and it made for a pretty expensive night for drinks (I mean I just drank Sprite and I think I had 3 and it was close to like $6.00 just for my sprites). I would have rather there have been no bar than a cash bar (plus one of the bartenders was drunk and everyone could tell it was really really really inappropriate). FI and I also did not get a piece of cake (not a huge deal since I don't really like cake) but I did hear she only got cake for 150 people (there were 200 people at her wedding mind you) because "50 people don't like cake and won't want it". I heard about 25 people ask why they hadn't gotten a piece and it was really awkward.
I did have fun reconnecting with my family. My dad has 3 other children (2 daughters and a son) who are all significantly older than me and we never really had a relationship. Until I was about 14 I could have walked right past them on the street and not known who they were. So it was really nice to see my sister and my brother there. And seeing all my cousins and taking pictures was nice. I went in thinking it was going to be so awkward since I don't know this side of my family that well but it ended up being a lot of fun even with all of the cringe worthy moments.
The best thing was that I know this guy loves my Aunt and that is the most important thing. He loves my cousin (her daughter) and they really are a great couple and I think for them, especially this being my Aunt's first wedding and she is 45 years old, they did the wedding they wanted and all in all it was fun. Some horrible etiquette things and a few things that I was offended by or just literally in shock by but at the same time I spent a good amount of time with my Dads family and my siblings and that was really nice.
Also I invtied people from my Dad's side because I thought it was the right thing to do (even though they are the reason I am over what I wanted my guest list to be but it's all good haha). And they all seemed so excited that i was getting married and to finally meet FI and just genuinley happy for me so I really appreciated that.
Sorry it was so long but I just had to tell my May 2013 buddies about this wedding haha.