Question for the Board

NikishaMcFall · June 2012

I just read an article discussing what to do if you hate your engagement ring. What are your thoughts?

I love my ring, but even if I didn't, I'm not sure I could tell Jon take it back. He bought it specifically for me out of love, how do you tell somebody that's not good enough?

Here's the article: http://www.projectwedding.com/post/list/pw-guide-article-do-you-hate-your-engagement-ring

emilyb213 · June 2012

We actually did have a situation the first time we celebrated my birthday. My fiance bought me a bracelet that was not even close to my style. When he handed the gift box to me, for whatever reason, my brain heard "This is from my parents". So, thinking his mom had picked it out (she had sent over a gift for me, it just wasn't the one I thought it was), I was like "Um, it was really thoughtful of your parents to get me a birthday gift, but...to be honest, this really isn't my style and I'm not sure I'll wear it." Well, my ears were wrong, he said that it was from him. He looked like a little kid who had just been told that Santa wasn't real. Three years later, I still feel terrible over it, although I am relieved that I don't have to pretend I love that bracelet.

So, I guess keeping that incident in mind, when he proposed, he actually did so without a ring. In his words "You're kind of a picky pain in the a$$, so I thought I'd take you ring shopping afterwards." That being said though, if he did pick out something I didn't like, I don't know if I'd be able to say anything to him, because I wouldn't want to intentionally hurt his feelings. And not only do I love my ring, but he'll look at it once in a while and remark on how pretty it is.

n3rdl3t · June 2012

We went shopping together for a ring months before he proposed, so I pretty much picked out the ring (he says he knows nothing about jewelry) so I ofc love it

runpipparun · June 2012

And... this is why we just decided to get married and picked out a ring together. Skipped the whole post-discussion, staged proposal business.

sparkles776 · June 2012

I am super picky. I would honestly be devestated if I didnt like my ring, because how do you tell the last person on earth you would want to hurt that? I LOVE my ring, but I also picked it out. FI even admits that he is happy he let me pick it out otherwise I never would have ended up remotely close to what I wanted. I narrowed it down between 2 for him, about 6 months before we got engaged, so I still didnt know which one he was going to choose.

blferguson1s · June 2012

I think it really depends on your relationship. Some women would never say a word and dislike their ring forever. Some would eventually trade it for something different. Some would be honest with their FI about it.

FI was always a fan of solitaires, but I've always loved 3 stones. As some of you know, we talked about getting married for a long time before getting engaged so we ventured through jewelry stores all the time and would online shop as well. I pointed out various ones I liked, and he took his mom with him to go buy the ring just to have another opinion. He (obviously by my sig pic) went with a 3 stone that I absolutely love.

After he gave it to me, he told me that we could trade it for something else for the first ninety days if I didn't like it. I think even if I hadn't, I would have learned to love it simply because of what it represented. I wouldn't trade it in for one exactly like it when it was messed up because this specific ring is the one he picked for me, and I don't want to go another day without it on my hand.

FutureMrsPrice2013 · June 2012

I love my ring. I couldn't imagine telling someone that because basically you're saying THEY'RE not good enough

My FI actually said the initial ring I wanted was too small and surprised me with one with a slightly bigger diamond

Then again he could have asked with a gummy ring and I wouldn't care lol!

rmp4996 · June 2012

I also love my ring, but I told him exactly what style I wanted. We had been together for a long time before that, and he is the type that wants to make sure he gets me what I like, so he pretty much did all the research and asked what I think I'd like. He'd show me some online and ask if I like that or not. We also discussed whether I wanted a high quality diamond with a good color rating or a less quality one that was bigger. I chose the have one with a good color that would sparkle rather than a big crappy rock. (Side note, FI bought be a 3-diamond promise ring after 3 years together, and it was gorgeous, but it had black spots in it. You couldn't see them just by looking at my finger, but I knew they were there and could be seen if looked at close and I didn't want that.) But I don't think I'd be able to tell him I didn't like it. He spent soooo much time shopping, picking a setting, learning all about diamonds and grades and stuff, it just meant so much to me that he put the effort in and I would def keep whatever he picked. Luckily I loved it.

rmp4996 · June 2012

P.S I love seeing all the siggys with the e-rings . Everyone has such different styles, yet all sooo pretty! I'll be sad when we change to something else next month. Emily, your ring looks ginormous on that flower, how many carats is it?

blf- I loved 3 stone rings too, but since I had that "promise ring" already I wanted something completly different. Yours is very pretty though, as is everyone else's

cnf2013 · June 2012

My ring is a family heirloom and very untradtional looking. My only concern was that I wouldn't be able to wear a wedding ring on the same finger as it due to the size and shape and he was kind of disheartened when I first brough up possibly removing the soldered on jacket. So now I've opted to just swap it to the hand after we marry and the more I thought about the less of a big deal I realized it was. It took me a bit to warm up to an unconventional ring, It just wasn't what I was expecting I guess,

but I love it because no one will ever have anything even near resemblance of it.

rmp4996 · June 2012

Cnf, your ring is beautiful and unique. Is that from his side of the family, or yours?

rmp4996 · June 2012

Cnf, your ring is beautiful and unique. Is that from his side of the family, or yours?

NikishaMcFall · June 2012

I agree. cnf's ring is absolutely gorgous. Plus, think of the mark it'll leave if you ever decide to backhand somebody

cnf2013 · June 2012

His side. The rings were his grandmothers- her original engagement ring, but all five stones were passed down to her husband from her aunt when he had it made. The jacket she had custom made later. It was his last surviving grandparent/grandmothers and I got to meet her just a few days before she passed, so it meant a lot for him to give it to me.

emilyb213 · June 2012

rmp, it's a little over 2.5 carats. The center stone is actually a light pink gemstone called morganite. When I picked the stone, it was over 3 carats, but it was oval cut, and I wanted a cushion cut stone. So it was cut down...with morganite, the larger the stone, the better the color shows, so most of the stones out there are over 2 carats. I didn't set out intending to get a ring that big, but I'm certainly not going to complain.

And I agree, I LOVE seeing everyone's rings!! They're all so unique and pretty.

rmp4996 · June 2012

Well Emily, it's beauitful. And CNF, that is a really sweet gesture that you got the family heirloom ring from his side. I love stories like that.

lauraprevost · June 2012

I'm loving seeing everyone's tickers below a year now! So exciting!

I haven't read the article yet but I will say I wasn't sure that I loved my ring at first. FI and I had gone ring shopping several times before we got engaged and I always showed him delicate solitaire's. I told him that I wanted a round diamond with 6 prongs. I was so set on the fact that I thought he was getting me a solitaire that when I saw my ring I was a little shocked. It is a little thicker than I had always pictured and I had a really hard time finding a wedding band that matched without making my ring look super thick on my hand. HOWEVER, I absolutely LOVE my ring now. It is pretty unique and I have found a few different wedding band options that I absolutely love. I know FI picked my ring out because he loved it and thought I would love it and that is the most important thing to me.

bananas1309 · June 2012

I'm really lucky my fiance has great taste and knows my style. ; )

His mother gave him her diamond and he helped custom design the band. It's really cool because it's one of those 2-piece sets where the wedding band fits into the engagement ring, so I have half of the full piece until our wedding day.

The only thing I had slightly hinted at was that I liked solitares as opposed to 3-stone rings.

Everyone's rings on here are so unique and different! I love it!

Mikesgal419 · June 2012

Everyone's rings are so beautiful.

Well... FI propsed with his mother's pearl rng. Which was gorgous, however, being a single mom of 5, I couldn't wear it, ever. Now, I LOVE Fi, but he is clueless when it comes to jewelery, so we talked about it and we went shopping. We didn't find anything and honestly, I wasn't feeling it. I finally decided to just get the ring sized and wear it. The setting was so different. It was actually a prong setting for a pearl. Well Fi went to get it sized and it's gold plated!! His mom had no clue. It was given to her by a family member. She felt so bad, he felt so bad. The pearl is real, just not the setting. Well... after talking, FI decided to just start from scratch . My sis and I went ot a very nice reputable jeweler and I told FI about it and gave him some pictures of the style I was looking at. He went last weekend and said he has a VERY productive day and that he bought 1 ring (we had talked about a set for me). However, I have NO clue what it looks like or even when I am going to get it. I told him that I want him to pick out something that when he sees it, he sees me. No pressure right?? No matter what it is, I know I will love it. It may not be my dream ring, but I have my dream guy, so eveything else is just a perk

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