MOB attire

adamsdia · June 2011

Does the bride get to select the color of the MOB's dress if the MOB will be walking the bride down the aisle?

vicki0508 · June 2011

No. The MOB is not in the WP. You can give her some kind direction if she wants it, but it should be the MOB's choice.

LoveMuffins · June 2011

You wouldn't get to dictate what the father is wearing either, so no you don't get to dictate what your mom is wearing. If you want to go on a fun shopping trip together and gently nudge her towards what you want - "Oh, mom this is such a pretty dress, why dont you try it on?" - that's fine, but if she finds something that she wants to wear then you should let her dress herself like the adult she is.

kmmssg · June 2011

Absolutely not!! Most women are very capable of dressing themselves for a formal occasion.

Why do you ask?

tenofcups4me · June 2011

Depends. In my crowd, it's the norm for the moms to wear colors that complement the bridal party so to some extent, yes the bride does choose a least the color family. In others, the last thing a parent wants to do is match the bridal party so they'd just need to know the BM's colors. But if your question is that mom wants blue and you think she looks better in purple, no, not your call.

salsamcg · June 2011

my mother and grandmother both walked me down the aisle. I let them where whatever they want. Why force someone double (or triple) your age into something? They are pretty capable of dressing themselves

Kniblet · June 2011

Mom should be able to decide her own color and clothing.

Muffin'sMom · June 2011

No...that's all.

[Deleted User] · June 2011

Really? When we registered for the tuxes, the guys at the store asked us what we wanted the fathers to wear. (We don't really care, as long as it isn't the same colors as the WP and so we left it open for them to decide.) I assumed that it was because the bride was supposed to pick the father's attire since he walked her down the aisle, why else would they ask? However, for MOB, I agree that she gets to pick her dress (even if she is walking you down the aisle), but you should take her shopping and point out things you would like to see her in.. its still her choice in the end, but she'll know what you like.

Kniblet · June 2011

[QUOTE]Really? When we registered for the tuxes, the guys at the store asked us what we wanted the fathers to wear. (We don't really care, as long as it isn't the same colors as the WP and so we left it open for them to decide.) I assumed that it was because the bride was supposed to pick the father's attire since he walked her down the aisle, why else would they ask?
Posted by Boog2011[/QUOTE]
They asked us the same thing. I think it's due to some brides having to have the final say in almost ALL attire.

We left it up to FIL to decide what he would wear.

Wiscisbliss · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-attire-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:3aed881d-7438-43e9-8255-1e512aa8e6a5Post:17003a2f-dfa4-44c1-b11e-ef272cbeb5c3">Re: MOB attire</a>:
[QUOTE]Really? <strong>When we registered for the tuxes, the guys at the store asked us what we wanted the fathers to wear</strong>. (We don't really care, as long as it isn't the same colors as the WP and so we left it open for them to decide.) I assumed that it was because the bride was supposed to pick the father's attire since he walked her down the aisle, why else would they ask? However, for MOB, I agree that she gets to pick her dress (even if she is walking you down the aisle), but you should take her shopping and point out things you would like to see her in.. its still her choice in the end, but she'll know what you like.
Posted by Boog2011[/QUOTE]

They did for us as well. I said "Ummm... Whatever they want?" I think what the store is really looking for is more sales and $$$.

So, OP - Do not tell your mother what to wear. Most MOBs know the wedding colors and formality and can handle selecting an appropriate dress. If she asks about colors/style I suppose you could make some suggestions...

peanutty2 · June 2011

I think you can guide her into a color family/ style, but she can pick out her own dress. I've found that some people want the bride to tell them exactly what to wear (even when the bride doesn't care and says "whatever you want"), so if your mom is asking you, then sure go ahead and give her some direction. But if your mom found a blue dress she'd love and you wanted green, then no, I don't think you can.

Maggie0829 · June 2011

Hopefully your Mom will ask for your opinion. Mine asked and I told her wear whatever she wants...if she loves it I will love it. If she does ask, then let her know what you think she will look good in because really it isn't about matching your color scheme it is about what she will look best in.

ADTonk · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-attire-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:3aed881d-7438-43e9-8255-1e512aa8e6a5Post:fbc2cb1a-bd45-483f-ae7a-1ff18b3f16d8">Re: MOB attire</a>:
[QUOTE]No. The MOB is not in the WP. You can give her some kind direction if she wants it, but it should be the MOB's choice.
Posted by vicki0508[/QUOTE]

This.

She's a big girl and she can dress herself.

regfalange · June 2011

We have the fathers dressed in the same tuxes as the groomsmen, so why not? I would just be like "Ma, can you at least get this color?"

Summer2011Bride · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-attire-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:3aed881d-7438-43e9-8255-1e512aa8e6a5Post:360c80c4-3e9f-42f1-b4ee-0a656f64c03e">Re: MOB attire</a>:
[QUOTE]We have the fathers dressed in the same tuxes as the groomsmen, so why not? I would just be like "Ma, can you at least get this color?"
Posted by regfalange[/QUOTE]

Parents are grown adults. You don't dictate their attire on regular days; why is this day any different? It's one thing if the mother/father ASKS you "What would you like me to wear?" (to which I'd still reply "Whatever you're comfortable in"), but dictating "You need to pick this color" is pretty crappy IMO. My mother spent weeks trying to find something that fit and she felt good in. If I had dictated a color, she might have had to settle for something she honestly didn't like. I would not want to put my mother, whom I love, in that position.

LoveMuffins · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-attire-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:3aed881d-7438-43e9-8255-1e512aa8e6a5Post:17003a2f-dfa4-44c1-b11e-ef272cbeb5c3">Re: MOB attire</a>:
[QUOTE]Really? When we registered for the tuxes, the guys at the store asked us what we wanted the fathers to wear. (We don't really care, as long as it isn't the same colors as the WP and so we left it open for them to decide.) I assumed that it was because the bride was supposed to pick the father's attire since he walked her down the aisle, why else would they ask? However, for MOB, I agree that she gets to pick her dress (even if she is walking you down the aisle), but you should take her shopping and point out things you would like to see her in.. its still her choice in the end, but she'll know what you like.
Posted by Boog2011[/QUOTE]

The Tux shop asks about the FOB's because they're hoping to make more money. They'd rather he wear a tux that he rents from them than any other option... but the FOB definitely can choose his own outfit just like the MOB. It's really just that the tux shop wants to make money off of it =) Can't blame them for trying, but you dont' have to play their game.

steffenfam · June 2011

As an MOB myself, it was hard enough to find any dress that looked nice, let alone finding a dress in a particular color. At my daughter's wedding I wore a brown dress; the bridesmaids wore navy blue.

I would say let Mom get a dress/color she likes, and as long as it isn't hoochy-mama, you're good to go. She won't be in photos with the wedding party, so color really shouldn't be an issue.

Kniblet · June 2011

[QUOTE]I can see why a mother wouldn't be interested in a "mother of the bride" dress. Most salons think they're fat, elderly frumps.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]
Amen to that. I told my mom to pick whatever she wanted, color and style. It took forever and she was nowhere NEAR the MOB gowns. She hated them all.

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