Just Engaged and Proposals

Kids or No Kids at Wedding?

Hi Ladies!
I just got engaged!! Wohoo, super excited!  My FI and I are trying to work on a tentative guest list to get an idea of how large our wedding will be.  We both come from very large families and have many close family friends.  Determining the complete guest list is going to be a fun ride.  No matter how small we try to make the wedding it's going to still be big.  To give you an idea, it'd be safe to say there's about 200 people that are close family alone!
Anyway, my question is regarding whether to invite kids or not.  I never thought I would invite kids to my wedding, However, we have a lot of cousins who have kids and some with limited child care.  these kids also range from babies to teens.  We also will have family coming from out of town with kids. Now for the the locals I can get away with not include children but if we have people coming out of town, where on earth would they put there kids?  I feel like if we invite kids for some we have to for all. 
Has anyone encounted this situation?  Any suggestions or advise.  I'm not sure what the best way to approach this would be. 
Thanks!!

Re: Kids or No Kids at Wedding?

  • DH and I decided to not have kids (with the exception of my two nephews).  We did get a couple of declines because of this but we knew it was going to happen and we were fine with it.

    If you really want everyone to come and can afford to invite all kids then do so.  If you can't afford to invite children then you need to be ok with having some family decline your invitation.
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  • You don't have to invite any kids. Like PP said, some guests will decline the invitation if their children aren't invited and it's OOT but that's their prerogative.


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  • We decided against inviting kids - it would have been almost 50 extra people. I was also worried about their behavior - I can't stand screaming and crying kids at a wedding. Unfortunately this meant some of our out of town guests couldn't come as they didn't have arrangements to watch their children, so that was the trade off.
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  • edited August 2012
    I only plan to have my 2 flower girls (my daughters)...... like others said, you can't plan their actions.... my first daughter was in attendance to my brothers wedding and you could hear her voice in the video..... she was 6months at the time.  I was a bridesmaid and it was my brother..... he was not going to decline us, so that was something he had to expect
  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    edited August 2012
    We did not invite kids. I'm not a "kid person" and I wanted to party the night away without little ones running around.
    We did have guests decline solely due to the fact that their children were not invited. On the flip side, several of our friends with kids were thrilled to get babysitters & come celebrate! Guests who really want to come will find sitters and those who want to be sourpusses will, well, be sourpusses. Laughing
  • We also did not invite any kids. With the exception of FI's cousins (but come wedding they will be nearly 18 and 16, so not really kids) The only other kids are nearly 10 and if that party decides to decline due to lack of a sitter we'll be ok with it.
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  • we are inviting all the children. for now its 14 kids from babies to teens (since the wedding is in 2015 this number can change) 

    since we are planning on doing a buffet we dont need to count each kid as an individual plate. also i couldnt imagine my wedding without my cousins and nephews etc.


  • I'm not inviting kids. The youngest person at my wedding will be my 15 year old cousin and frankly he's not really a kid anymore. Kids ruin weddings. I went to my FH cousins wedding a couple years ago and her flowers girl bawled through the entire ceremony. It was horrible. Nope I'm not dealing with it. If people would rather not come than find a baby sitter than that's a shame because there's gonna be great food, great music and an open bar.
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  • We provide childcare at the wedding and reception. License and Insured. Mobile Mommies LLC on facebook and web mymobilemommies dot com.
  • We're still debating, but leaning towards no kids at our wedding, as well. His cousins are terribly misbehaved. My cousins are better behaved, but there's quite a few of them. We're on a very tight budget, and are trying to keep it under 50 people. I don't think there's an issue with not inviting children, especially when there are two very large families.
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