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October 2012 Weddings

Dad/Step Dad involment advice!

My step dad works for a photography company and is so generous in providing the photography for our wedding.  When I met with our photog to go through all of the plans, he kept asking what my step dad was going to be doing in the wedding...(since he has a relationship with him)

...I hadn't even thought about him!  (other than getting him a bout) 
Back story: He has been married to my mom since I was 8 and they have 3 children together.  My mom is crazy...so I didn't live in the house very much, but he was so wonderful to me and treated me with love/care with out trying to take the place of my dad.  I would say we have a pretty good relationship. (except when we went on a family vacay with out my mom and he was a little crazy too)  His/my mom's relationship is NOT very good.  She was mad when I invited his family to the wedding and it seems like off again on again they're getting a divorce.  Since I've gone to college my relationship with my mom has improved in the way that I accept two things A.) She's my mother and I can't chang it B.) She's crazy so don't really ask her anything deep or rely on her.  But I still go home all the time to visit my siblings and everything is A OK.

I am SO close with my dad.  He was there for me the whole time my mom was crazy (which was my entire life haha)  and even now we talk a lot and he helps me with any problem I have.  He's obviously walking me down the aisle AND doing the father/daughter dance.

But I want to involve my step dad with out making my dad a little upset (and if I do involve my step dad I would have to involve my step MOM who is a whole other story) and with out making my mom mad (which is would defiantly) Maybe something little?  Not a dance and defiantly NOT co walking me down the aisle...but idk what else!

Ideas?

Re: Dad/Step Dad involment advice!

  • Why not a dance? Does he not like it?
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • Can you write him a letter about how much he's meant to you over the years?
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  • I say no dance because he has recently had a hip replacement and I feel like it might take away from mine/my dad's dance (plus too many dances gets redundant and boring for guests I feel...)  Also it would PISS my mom off.  As MOB she doesn't really get to be in the spotlight (and I don't want her to be) but if my step dad is she'll flip.

    I could write a letter!
  • Maybe mention him in the programs as a guest of honor, mention him by name in your thank you (if you're doing one) at the reception? I also like writing him a letter, that will definitely go over well.
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