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Catholic Weddings

Looking for prayers and advice

A few months back I came here looking for advice on a Convalidation. My husband and I were at a point in our life where it seemed like such a good thing for us to grow as a couple in our lives and faith. As the day drew closer my husband began to act odd and he ended up calling it off claiming it wasn't what I really wanted. After Christmas he asked for a divorce and said he no longer loved me. In the last few weeks more details have leaked and I have found out he is having an affair with my supposed best friend. They are already planning a wedding which leads me to believe this has been happening for quite some time. I feel like my marriage was a lie, I feel hurt, and I feel lost. We have two small children too. Although we are only separated I know this marriage is over. It hurts and I can't help but wonder if the reason we aren't together is because until the end we never even thought to have God in our marriage. So I ask for prayers. Prayers for healing and prayers that I can move on in my life and prayers for comfort. Thank you.
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Re: Looking for prayers and advice

  • I remember you! I'm so sorry to hear this. How heartbreaking for you. :( definitely will pray for peace and healing.
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  • what a horrible situation! prayers for you, especially that you will find peace from God and that He will work through this. (He will.)
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  • I'm so sorry to hear that. Prayers!

     

  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited February 2013
    Ash, i am terribly sorry to hear this.  i too remember you.

    please know you can lean on us for support at anytime. 
  • I'm so sorry you're going through this. I hope you find peace soon. Many parishes now have support groups for separated and divorced people. Is that something you might be interested in? Having faith and faithful friends to lean on could be comforting. ::hugs::
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  • Thank you everyone! I appreciate the music! I'm sticking close to my friends and going to church and praying. Praying so much. I appreciate all prayers right now. It's a mess and a struggle, but I'm holding onto the fact that God is here and will protect me and comfort me.
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  • Ash, my heart is broken for you!  That's awful.  It must be so hard, but God will get you through this!  And we are here for you if you just need to talk about anything.

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  • Definitely will keep you and your family in my prayers.  I'm so sorry to hear all this.
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  • *hugs and prayers* to you.

    I'm also sending an extra little squeeze for your Hannah, who is only a few days older than my C. And one for your Claire just for good measure.
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  • I'm so sorry to hear about your situation not going for the better :-(  Hugs and prayers for you and your daughters and glad that you're getting lots of support from your friends, family and God!
  • I will also be keeping you and your family in my prayers. I find so much comfort in my faith in God when I'm at my lowest. He will lift you up. And we can try, too [HUGS]
  • Please don't think his behavior is at all related to being not yet married by the Church--God does not punish people like that.  Your husband is totally responsible for his own actions.  

    You were a faithful spouse who tried to strengthen your bonds through a blessing of it in the Church, and that is a wonderful testament to you.  

    I did have an aunt who was rushed into marriage because she was pregnant, and her husband said they did not have enough time to get it done in the Church.  Then for fifteen years he stalled her, and then divorced her and said it didn't count since it was never done in the Church, completely disrespectful of her and their children.  Some people just plain suck.
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    Previously Alaynajuliana


  • actually, there is something to be said for the grace from the sacrament. It's not a matter of "God punishing" but more along the lines of the choice to not include that avenue of grace needed. 
  • I will be keeping you in my prayers!  I've been through a divorce and now I am on the road to a marriage... One with CHRIST as the center. Be Blessed and feel free to private message me.....

    God will bless you.... It took what seemed like an endless 7 years for me, but I am here now...

    Michelle.

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  • Don't despair.  God is with you.  Even when he feels far away he is right there and just wants you to turn to him, trust him and put all of your faith into knowing he will never forsake you despite what might be happening on the outside. 

    You and M&M's stories are very similar to mine.  I went through a relationship and then marriage that all total lasted 7 years (only 1 1/2 years was marriage).  We married at the JOP and later planned a convalidation.  Like you, as the day drew nearer, he changed his mind.  He was being unfaithful as well.  But we had not had any children. 

    I was strangely ok about it because after all the years of ups and downs it was time for me to face up and accept the man for who he was and who he was not.  He did not deserve me and I wanted either much better than him or to be alone focused on serving God and whatever his will for me would be, even if that would have been staying alone for years and becoming a missionary. I let go of any fear of what the future would bring or of being alone.

    In 2011 I filed for divorce on the advice of a church advisor who knew that I would qualify for an annulment.  As soon as the ink was dry on the papers in September 2011 I filed for an annulment.  By December I had reconnected with an old friend who I had not seen in 2 years.  We began to date and in May of 2012 he proposed.  We will marry this September, a little less than 2 years since my divorce. We both look forward to having a family.

    You never know what God has in store.  Sometimes He's just waiting for you to get out of your own way and His way so that he can bless you the way He wants to.
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