WTF Tuesday?

k8888 · July 2012

I need to vent today. I'm hoping some of you may need to let out some steam, too.

#1
My FMIL sat down with me last night to go over her side of the seating chart. She, very nicely, asked if she could pretty much rearrange the entire seating chart so that all of "her" tables can sit together and be close to our sweetheart table. OK, fine... but now I have to move all of our friends away from us and now a lot of my friends won't get to sit near each other. I was extremely put-off by her request simply because her and my FFIL haven't contributed a dime to our wedding. You want to make demands, then you can fork over some contribution, otherwise you take what I give you. But, I don't have the heart to say no to her, so now FI and I don't get to sit near our friends. And now HE'S mad at me. She's your mother, you f*ing deal with her then.

I realize this all makes me sound like a brat and at this point I couldn't care less.

#2
The girl I'm training as my pseudo-replacement is the most annoying person I've ever met. She's completely underqualified for this position. She talks to herself CONSTANTLY. She drinks 14 cans of soda every day. She hasn't taken a single note this entire time and continually asks the same goddamn questions. If the next 2.5 days don't fly by I may off myself.

On a brighter note, my bachelorette party is this weekend and I'm so ready to party with my most favorite girls on the planet. (No, not you guys, sorry.... that's next month)

VENT AWAY

molly&dale · July 2012

It's always the FMIL, right?!? Mine is cooking for the rehearsal dinner. I'm providing the location, setting up tables, buying and bringing all the drinks, bought all the decorations, sent out the invites, etc. She is just providing food. So she calls FI and asks if he and I could come over Thursday to help her make food. Uh, no, we can't. FI is working all week. We live an hour away from her, and we are doing everything else besides the food. Plus this is all she is doing for the whole wedding weekend!

butterflyjumper1 · July 2012

ugggghhhh. No way would I give in to that request. You are nicer than I am!!! Why do all her tables need to be next to each other? It would be one thing to ask to look at it to make sure her friends were arranged in groups that would get along with each other (we plan to run the tables by our parents to make sure our groups will mesh and not start any feuds), but who the hell cares WHERE the tables are?

My FMIL has been pretty hidden throughout the planning process. She lives an hour away and her and her husband are a lot older than most parents of people my age (she is in her 60s and FFIL is in his 70s) so they, quite frankly, are not as active as younger people, they get tired easily, and don't like making the trip down to see us very often. Fiance and I got a really nasty email from his sister/my FSIL and Bridesmaid saying that their mom was feeling VERY left out and she would really appreciate it if we could start involving her in more activities. UGH. made me feel like crap, even though I email her all the time, and have tried to get her to help, but she never wants to come down, or is feeling too tired to come see us, and didnt even feel like addressing the rehearsal dinner invitations (the ONE task I tried to get her to do). SO FRUSTRATING

pillsburyaj · July 2012

K8, That is a bummer about the seating chart! :-( We didn't do one because it seems more of a hassle than it's worth.

Hopefully, you'll have an awesome bach party and you can forget all of the things that have been stressing you out!

My WTF is that my dad is dragging his feet on getting the booze for the wedding, which is in 10 days.

michelle11988 · July 2012

Ummmmm, yeah my mom tried to move all of our family tables to the aisle that we will be walking down and close to the dance floor and put my FI's family's tables in the corners of the rooms. I was like yep not happening so pick half the tables that will be closer and half will be in corners just like FI's family.

My vent is my mom called my yesterday at work screaming about hotel rooms and how my sister wants to stay with one of the other bridesmaids so I gave her original room to a groomsman that waited until the last minute to book one and they were sold out and my sister and parents said it was fine. Now my mom wants me to ask him to stay elsewhere in case my sister wants to stay in her own room because her and my parents have to get up at like 6am to drive her back to her camp counselor job and they feel bad waking up the other bridesmaid. I was like f*ck off I'm at work.

My other vent is that my clients suck, they clearly don't understand I can't stay late because you want to go out all day and do nothing and come by to pick up tax returns at like 8pm and I'm getting married this weekend so shove it!!!!

Thankfully just 4 more days until the wedding and 6 until I'm on my flight to Hawaii!

Nati05 · July 2012

Seriously, what's up with FMILs lately?? Have they all lost it or something? I posted my annoyance with FMIL yesterday on FB. I seriously can't handle that woman's lack of memory and readiness to blame everyone else for her own dumb freakouts. On another note, I saw my mom's new dress yesterday on Skype and I absolutely loooove it!! It's soo flattering on her! I won't even bother mentioning it to FMIL though. It's highly possible she'll start mentally comparing my mom's dress to hers, without ever having seen it of course, and that alone will probably throw her into some kind of panic attack or something. Ugh

LADY324 · July 2012

Kate I am sorry that totally blows!! You are nice that you gave into her request. For what it is worth you guys will be sitting in your seats for all of 20 minutes that night to eat if you are lucky. I am sure most of the time you guys will be mingling around with people so try not to let it bother you too much!!

Have a great time at your bachelorette party this weekend

bells24412 · July 2012

kATE I so know you feel because I was there this past weekend. The woman wanted me to do her tables for her and then she was mad because my tables were full and they couldn't put the people where they didn't know where to put with my family. Sorry lady! ugh! Hang in there.

On the other hand, have fun at your bachlorette party!!

Nati05 · July 2012

K8, why is FI mad at you?? That's not fair!

Michelle that wasn't very nice of your mom

Why would she want to stick them in the corners?

Sometimes I get the impression that FI doesn't really like my family that lives here. They're from another part of the country where it's a completely different culture/ lifestyle that clashes with his family's culture/ lifestyle. He said he wants to keep their tables seperated -.- I knew what he meant but it sounded mean. It was actually my plan all along, my family's tables near each other, friends' tables near each other and his family's tables near each other. But his comment rubbed me the wrong way. Ah well.. seating charts!! So fun. Not.

LADY324 · July 2012

My FMIL asked me this past friday when we were at her house with my parents doing the seating chart if her and FFIL could come to the pictures later on. I told her that the formal pictures start at 3pm. She asked why so early? I said because we are taking all formal shots before the ceremony and we need about 2-2/1 hours so she said ok as long as there is somewhere I can sit in air conditioning. She is so lazy I can't stand it. His parents are in their upper 60's I think they are both 67 my mom is 52 so there is a huge age difference. His parents feel more like grand parents to me then actual parents.

This woman just doesn't get some things. I don't even know if she is getting her makeup done. She is getting her hair done but her hair is super short I have no idea what they are even going to do with it. This is her only child getting married and she is acting like she is just attending another wedding and not acting like a mother of the groom at all!! She annoys me more and more as we are getting older.

bells24412 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:7abbf910-f266-4646-9aee-4b6f50c45156">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]My FMIL asked me this past friday when we were at her house with my parents doing the seating chart if her and FFIL could come to the pictures later on. I told her that the formal pictures start at 3pm. She asked why so early? I said because we are taking all formal shots before the ceremony and we need about 2-2/1 hours so she said ok as long as there is somewhere I can sit in air conditioning. She is so lazy I can't stand it. His parents are in their upper 60's I think they are both 67 my mom is 52 so there is a huge age difference. His parents feel more like grand parents to me then actual parents. This woman just doesn't get some things. I don't even know if she is getting her makeup done. She is getting her hair done but her hair is super short I have no idea what they are even going to do with it. This is her only child getting married and she is acting like she is just attending another wedding and not acting like a mother of the groom at all!! She annoys me more and more as we are getting older.
Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]

My FMIL annoys me everyday! lol.

butterflyjumper1 · July 2012

LADY we are in the same boat, totally!!! our FMIL's sound identical.

My father is paying for all BMs/junior BMs to have hair and makeup done. We offered to pay for FMIL to have hair and makeup done. We literally had the check ready to go (we pay by person in advance) and she tells us at dinner on Sunday that she couldn't fathom letting anyone touch her hair or her face and she just wouldn't be comfortbale with hair and makeup. She can't be outside or doing activities for too long without resting. She is wearing a dress that would be perfectly acceptable for a wedding guest, but is so casual that I am embarassed for her.

LADY324 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:6a4227f0-f237-4f33-8e0f-172af186cadd">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]LADY we are in the same boat, totally!!! our FMIL's sound identical. My father is paying for all BMs/junior BMs to have hair and makeup done. We offered to pay for FMIL to have hair and makeup done. We literally had the check ready to go (we pay by person in advance) and she tells us at dinner on Sunday that she couldn't fathom letting anyone touch her hair or her face and she just wouldn't be comfortbale with hair and makeup. She can't be outside or doing activities for too long without resting. She is wearing a dress that would be perfectly acceptable for a wedding guest, but is so casual that I am embarassed for her.
Posted by butterflyjumper1[/QUOTE]

They do sound exactly the same!! I asked FMIL if she bought a dress and she said yes but it's not a dress she bought 2 dress skirts and 1 pair of dress pants but the legs flow together like a skirt. Then she said she bought a shell tank top and a cream colored jacket with sparkles to go over it. I have no idea what this woman is going to show up looking like.

bells24412 · July 2012

Lady and Butterfly your FMIL sound like work! I thought mine was pretty bad she is just a BIG PITA!!! She is having empty nest syndrom even though she has 2 other kids!!!!

butterflyjumper1 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:ad496878-9add-4d52-85c6-e9eb9ce16a1d">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WTF Tuesday? : They do sound exactly the same!! I asked FMIL if she bought a dress and she said yes but it's not a dress she bought 2 dress skirts and 1 pair of dress pants but the legs flow together like a skirt. Then she said she bought a shell tank top and a cream colored jacket with sparkles to go over it. I have no idea what this woman is going to show up looking like. 
Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]
oh nooooooooooo. this sounds somewhat disastrous!!

My FMIL is wearing a short dress with a collar that is somewhat shiny and has short sleeves that is a color called "MINK." it is a gross between a pea green and a poop brown. BEAUTIFUL. My florist has no idea how to match a garden-inspired lavender, ivory, purple, and blush pink corsage to it.

honeybear072012 · July 2012

Oh man. Ladies, you just made me laugh! I thought my FMIL was at PITA but not nearly as bad as all of yours!

My WTF is that FI's aunt is now trying to invite herself to the rehearsal dinner. I am so over this rehearsal dinner it's unbelievable! I just can't wait till I can marry FI on Saturday and wish all this stupid drama would just be over!

k8888 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:c0189108-dea0-481d-9dd4-f68f8e6082b8">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ummmmm, yeah my mom tried to move all of our family tables to the aisle that we will be walking down and close to the dance floor and put my FI's family's tables in the corners of the rooms. I was like yep not happening so pick half the tables that will be closer and half will be in corners just like FI's family. My vent is my mom called my yesterday at work screaming about hotel rooms and how my sister wants to stay with one of the other bridesmaids so I gave her original room to a groomsman that waited until the last minute to book one and they were sold out and my sister and parents said it was fine. Now my mom wants me to ask him to stay elsewhere in case my sister wants to stay in her own room because her and my parents have to get up at like 6am to drive her back to her camp counselor job and they feel bad waking up the other bridesmaid. I was like f*ck off I'm at work. My other vent is that my clients suck, they clearly don't understand I can't stay late because you want to go out all day and do nothing and come by to pick up tax returns at like 8pm and I'm getting married this weekend so shove it!!!! Thankfully just 4 more days until the wedding and 6 until I'm on my flight to Hawaii!
Posted by michelle11988[/QUOTE]

BAHAHAHA you come off as such a sweet, mild-tempered person, and this just totally made my day

Have fun in Hawaii, I'll be there shortly following you!!

michelle11988 · July 2012

Nati - basically the room has an outer circle of tables and an inner with the pathway that everyone will be coming in as annoucned to the dance floor. So obviously she wants all her family along that so they can see the best and get the best pictures, even though they are all younger than FI's great aunts and great uncles!

K888 - I try to be mild-tempered and good mannered but seriously I was chatting with my client yesterday and he was like so what's the worst part of planning and I responded with my mom hopefully I don't kill her by the end. I think its just because my mom and I are totally different personalties and just butt-heads and usually I let her get her way but I'm so over it! She wanted to come over and clean my house for me and unpack all of my sh*t and I had to tell her 3 times no and the 4th time I threatened to change the locks because I gave her an emergency key she was going to use. seriously wtf b*tch?!

Nati05 · July 2012

Hahahaha ditto K8! I'm loving getting to know this whole other side to Michelle!!

LADY, that outfit sounds really scary...

Butterfly, wait... your florist is trying to match a part of the corsage to her dress? Are corsages supposed to in some way match what they're wearing??? This might change all my corsage making plans....

butterflyjumper1 · July 2012

nati hahahahaha she isn't trying to match it persay....it's more that the color of the dress is just so hideous, that she doesn't think any flowers will save it or look remotely pretty with it. It's just hard to make anything look pretty on top of puke green fabric. My florist has asked for dress pics/colors just to make sure everything coordinates well and looks pretty but I am no expert like you so I really have no idea how our florist's mind works!!

michelle11988 · July 2012

Nati - Our florist asked for dress colors to make sure that everything doesn't clash horribly.

Butterfly - Maybe some awesome ivory and bright colored flowers???? I can't even imagine that dress color.

Nati05 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:c0ede7db-2b2b-4c92-9315-432e4bb54fbe">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]nati hahahahaha she isn't trying to match it persay....it's more that the color of the dress is just so hideous, that she doesn't think any flowers will save it or look remotely pretty with it. It's just hard to make anything look pretty on top of puke green fabric. My florist has asked for dress pics/colors just to make sure everything coordinates well and looks pretty but I am no expert like you so I really have no idea how our florist's mind works!!
Posted by butterflyjumper1[/QUOTE]

Okay, whew. Well that makes sense. But my plan so far was to make all corsages match our color scheme, regardless of what color they're wearing. I might stick to the same plan so that my brain doesn't explode lol....

ETA: Posted before I saw yours Michelle. Damnit.. I'm in trouble! haha shoot me.

That color sounds awful btw. I'm really really sorry! LOL

honeybear072012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_wtf-tuesday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:939e88f9-de92-43e8-a1d8-dc1ef6e9f447Post:b66432ce-7472-4b5c-9a00-53d4176692e9">Re: WTF Tuesday?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WTF Tuesday? : I have friends trying to invite themselves to the ceremony. I'm pretty sure they're just saying it to freak me out. Pretty sure...
Posted by Schatzi13[/QUOTE]

Oh boy I hope so! That would be awful if they just showed up! Then what would they do? Just leave again?

Some members of the Church we're getting married at are planning on coming to the ceremony I think. My family has been going there forever so they all know me. But I kind of hope they don't!

Nati05 · July 2012

Oo yeah Michelle's suggestion is great, ivory, anything neutral, muted lol... that should do it.

butterflyjumper1 · July 2012

Nati, I think it's normal to stay within the color scheme - just like Michelle said, with the puke green dress, I think the florist is doing more ivories than purples/blush pinks, to try to coordinate with the outfit. You wouldn't give someone a totally different color just because of an outfit, you would just use what colors worked best from your palette to complement their outfit. Make sense?

but yes, thank you for your sympathies on the dress choice. It's really quite horrid. I have been a really good bride, though, and told FMIL that I want her to wear whatever she is most comfortable in that will make her happy.

Nati05 · July 2012

Thanks butterfly, that makes total sense. This will be a fun convo with FMIL. Dress colors! Mmm yay!! I just might ask gma first haha

ETA: Good for you btw!! That's gotta be really hard to do while looking at a horrible dress

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