Selecting a Priest

Ashley42410 · May 2010

Hi there, I was wondering, is it common to have a priest from another parish travel to preside at a ceremony at the parish you choose?

My parish has a lovely chapel, but it is in a relatively remote location without any reception venues close by. It seems to make more sense to seek out a Church in another location, but I would feel most comfortable having the pastor at my home parish marry me.

Are most of you planning to be married by a priest you know?

ANBJTC111310 · May 2010

I chose a priest from another parish who used to be at my church. It's completely acceptable.

CourtneyJ2010 · May 2010

Completely acceptable but make sure both Priests are okay with it especially the one at the parish you want him to travel to.

Calypso1977 · May 2010

i couldnt imagine being married by a priest i didnt know. we were married in our regular parish, not in the parish i grew up in or the parish my husband grew up in, but the one we attend currently, as a couple.

samurai21 · May 2010

I was in a similar situation. My home parish was too small and not near any reception sites that would fit our guest lists, but I've never felt close to my old home parish's priest.

We're getting married at a church in Indianapolis by a priest from the church I went to while in college in a different city that I feel much closer too. We just had to have a letter from my home parish priest saying he was ok no marrying us, but since he would be marrying you I doubt you'll run into problems. A lot of the churches we looked at required that you bring your own priest if you aren't member anyway.

Theresa626 · May 2010

It can happen but it is up to the Bishop of the diocese in which you choose to marry. The priest you want must write a formal letter to that bishop and to the church you wish to marry in requesting that he marry you. Once the bishop grants permission, then you can move forward with setting a date at the church you want. This takes a lot of time so I would recommend getting started right away if it's what you want to do.

Theresa626 · May 2010

hmmm...it seems like others didn't have to go though all that. Perhaps each diocese is different.

I am having a different priest without having to go through the bishop but that's because his parish church isn't built yet and they meet in a school cafeteria. So, he does all weddings at a beautiful church that is much closer to everything that he used to work at. He has a standing relationship with that church so no bishop approval is needed.

Riss91 · May 2010

We were married in a church that was not our "home parish". We spoke with the priest at that parish and he was absolutely fine with us bringing in a different priest. My sister also did a similar thing. She got married in her home parish church, but they brought in her husband's priest, so both the bride and groom had a connection.

We didn't need any special approval from a bishop, just the priest's permission. I would contact the pastor at the church you wish to be married in and ask if he would be okay with you bringing in another priest.

Ashley42410 · May 2010

Thanks for the tips, everyone!

ellen73 · May 2010

We are getting married in Cleveland, FI is from Philly but has lived in Chicago for 8 years and I lived in Chicago for 8 years and then Columbus for the past 2. We chose to get married in Cleveland b/c I have a bigger family and it's a shorter distance for his family to travel than Chicago. So the dilemma was- where to get married?? The parish I grew up in is closing this month. My parents moved 10 years ago, and I have no connection to their new parish at all. We also didn't have much time to search for a church- we got engaged a week before Christmas, and then decided right after Christmas to get married this summer. So the six month deadline was quickly approaching. I was close to a couple of priests in Chicago (and one now lives in San Francisco)- but we needed to make decisions fast. Once word got out about the engagement, we had a couple priests volunteer to marry us (I have an aunt that was a canon lawyer- so I grew up around knowing priests and other religious as "normal" people)! The priest we selected is a family friend, and is friends with the pastor of the parish we chose to get married in (air conditioned, pretty, good location, available for the dates we picked). We did this all in about 3 days. I checked the date at the church, spoke with the pastor, he OKd having a different priest, and the letter did have to be sent to the Bishop. However, they said it's very rare that permission wouldn't be granted- esp. since we both are active in our faith and in our parishes. I think it would be different if you didn't know anyone and they didn't know you.

Good luck!!

echo136 · May 2010

You only need the permission from teh bishop if you are inviting a priest from outside the diocese you are getting married in. If you are just asking one from another parish in the same diocese, he has already been 'ok'd' by the Bishop. It's a just a way of making sure that they don't have randoms coming in claiming to be priests and 'handing' out the sacraments.

Selecting a Priest

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