My mom said nothing...

mandydc0509 · April 2012

... when she looked at my first fitting photos. Silence usually means she has nothing nice to say.

She already blatantly said that she didn't like the one I chose as much as the one we looked at with my father at Alfred Angelo, but I thought after 8 months that she'd get over that? And that I chose to wear ivory. She seems to really hate that even though I told her the softer color made me feel prettier. I think she thinks the dress isn't big enough and is too plain... despite the fact that I told her I wanted something simple and elegant (click).

Oh well, as my FI and MOH said, I can't please everyone, but I would like my mother to like my dress.

SunshineShades · April 2012

I think it is a gorgeous dress. I bet on the day of your mum with think it looks beautiful. It can be hard to really see what a dress looks like during fittings etc. Once you are all dressed with your hair done and so on she will view things differently.
I think a lot of mums have it in their heads their daughters should wear a big poofy ball gown. My mum was itching for me to wear one. I knew it wasnt what I wanted, and luckily for me, once I tried one on she realized it was not me.

And I agree with you, I prefer an ivory to a stark white. My dress is ivory, but a very light ivory.

As long as you love it, that is all that matters. You'll get tons of compliments the day of about how gorgeous your dress is, and I bet your mum will agree.

jeja234 · April 2012

Do not worry about what your mom thinks of your dress, you love it and that is ALL that matters . Do not ask her again what she thinks or show her pictiures because her answer ( or lack thereof) will probably not be what you want to hear and add stress that you do not want. Throughout this wedding planning process I have learned that you will NEVER please everyone and that you need to pick the things You love or you FH loves.

AurorasEnvy · April 2012

I agree with PPs! If she wants you in a big woofy white ballgown, and you prefer/chose a more refine, elegant, ivory gown, only one of you can really love it. And I think you made the right choice since YOU have to wear it! And on your day when you are all dressed up & glowing because you feel confident in your dress, I'm sure your mom will come around, too =]

ladychambers83 · April 2012

I agree with PP, once you're all done up your mama will see how stunning you look. And once you're happy, she'll get over her own expectations.. Your FI and MOH are right, you can't please everyone.

Your dress is very pretty btw

comeongetdown · April 2012

i think the dress is gorgeous! it's very classic and elegant, which it sounds like that's what you want. i'm sorry your mom's not on board

toothpastechica · April 2012

I can't wait till May 21st, the day after the wedding...my mom seems to think that she has a say in how I dress on a regular basis, often saying that I dress far to 'provocative'. She has actaully said to me: well when you get married you can dress however you want, cuz my opinion wont matter". Now if you met me and saw how I dress..the comments I get from friends who I have asked, is that I dress very very conservativly, I dont wear booty shorts, I only own maybe 2 low cut dresses that I only ever wear eith a tank top under it or in the summer over a swimsuit....not to mention I am 25, and moved out when I was 17...not sure why moms feel they have a say that far into adulthood! Don't get me wrong, but its a hassle to have to wear t-shirts and jeans to every event where my mom will be. (Im sure she will have a heart attack at the dress I got my shower, its knee length and sweethear top)

Anyways, as people said, if you love it, wear it and own it. I think when it comes down to the day, your mother will have stronger emotions going then to even really think about "oh gosh she wore that dress I didnt like", she is your mother after all. And people are right with your hair and makeup done, in more natural light, the dress will look a lot different then in a store for a fitting.

LuckyHeather · April 2012

I agree with PP. Stay strong and be confident. It is YOUR day. You will look fantastic!

amandad18 · April 2012

Your dress is beautiful!

My mom has been the same way about EVERYTHING. I constantly send her pictures of decor that we've made or emails about our plans, and I never get anything but negative responses from her. It's very hard not to take it personally when it seems like your mom hates everything about your wedding

S0095042 · April 2012

I agree with PPs and it's not "too" plain. I

the bodice, VERY elegent and classic

MsAmeera25 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_my-mom-said-nothing?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:6840e667-dff7-49ee-9d52-1a3e9f45470aPost:cd6304f6-2bc2-4930-bd78-0604a82ac15b">Re: My mom said nothing...</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with PP. Stay strong and be confident. It is YOUR day. You will look fantastic!
Posted by LuckyHeather[/QUOTE]
I agree!!!

vineyard12 · April 2012

Seriously. What's wrong with your mom? That is an absolutely gorgous dress!!!!

Everyone has their own view of how a wedding dress should be. Some think it should be big, white, and pouffy. Others sleek and elegant and timeless. My mother never said to me what she thought I should wear. She just wanted me to wear what I loved and felt wonderful in.

I bet anything that once your mother sees you in that dress, all done up, she'll eat her words.

littleshrink · April 2012

I must be losing my eyesight, because there is nothing plain and simple about your dress. It is stunning. I'm sorry your mom is not on board with your dress. You should be able to discuss and relish in your dress with your mom. It's been one of the things my mom and I have had the most fun with. But initially my mom wanted to big ol poofy ballgown (I think our moms actually see us as their little girls forever!) but once I put my dress on - she was completely on board. Mine is also a off white color - pearl. Maybe consider having her go to your next fitting if you feel up to it, that is. My mom was a huge help in my fitting and she loved it because I leaned on her for advice with the process. It might help your mom see what is really important.

mandi921vh · April 2012

Your dress is beautiful!

LOMLBOAT · April 2012

I have a Casablanca dress too and my mom wanted the big poofy dress, but she agreed that if I felt beautiful, then I looked beautiful. I agree w/ PP then once you are all done up, she's probably break down. I know some people use negativity when they are feeling hurt. Your mom might just be having a hard time with you getting married and may not know what to do with her emotions. I would only show her things that she asks about and know that you are going to look AMAZING on your wedding day.

mandydc0509 · April 2012

Thank you SO much ladies. This makes me feel better to know there are other people with mother issues haha. And you're right, I probably need to stop showing her stuff unless she specifically asks, which isn't often.

And yup, I love my dress and know FI will too. That's all that matters

My mom said nothing...

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