Can I start over?

Katiesue04 · July 2012

The more I keep thinking about it the more uncomfortable I get. I hate being the center of attention. We are having a huge wedding about 250 guests, and I originally just wanted to get married on a beach with a handful of family members. I feel like I am stuck in a wedding I don't want to be in and I have major aniexty being in front of people. FI keeps talking me out of it and saying it will be fine but I just don't want it anymore

I feel like we spent all this money and I can't change anything anymore.

cronin85 · July 2012

You sound EXACTLY like me... except we are having about 150 people. I hate people looking at me, it makes me reallly uncomfortable (I even feel ackward opening b-day gifts from my family in front of just a few people). I hate attention. Unfortunately I have no idea how to get over this fear and move on. I'm afraid I might pass out.

BMcLeodTeam · July 2012

Sounds like a very similar situation, I wanted to elope and he wanted a big wedding so we invited 300...

ssegall · July 2012

I'm feeling sort of the same way. I had such anxiety being the center of attention at my bridal shower. I'm learning to meditate, seriously, so I can calmly get through the ceremony (that I planned, so I have NO room to be complaining).

We'll be fine, girls.

loinmo · July 2012

I have anxiety issues in front of people as well. We have 235 invited.

kmleon83 · July 2012

SAME! I'm really excited about everything but I'm extremely anxious at the same time! I start to sweat and get red in the face when people look at me. My shower is this weekend and I know it's my friends and family who I love to pieces but still..they'll all be looking at me. hahah. I just plan on breathing deeply and slowly and trying to enjoy it all as much as possible!

Katiesue04 · July 2012

My FI gave me options like making sure no one comes to our ceremony but hello we already sent out all the invites we can't uninvite people that would be rude. I just don't know what to do anymore. The more and more closer I get to the wedding the more depressed I get. I just have a fear I am going to throw up on FI in front of everyone.

Katiesue04 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_can-i-start-over?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:dbcc0c81-c68a-4859-913f-a353c73128b3Post:def099f2-8131-4798-87c1-4a0691743b35">Re: Can I start over?</a>:
[QUOTE]SAME! I'm really excited about everything but I'm extremely anxious at the same time! I start to sweat and get red in the face when people look at me. My shower is this weekend and I know it's my friends and family who I love to pieces but still..they'll all be looking at me. hahah. I just plan on breathing deeply and slowly and trying to enjoy it all as much as possible!
Posted by kmleon83[/QUOTE]

<div>Same reason I am not having a shower. The last shower I went to it was just ackward. Plus I have lived in my house for three years and don't need anything else. </div>

mamameech · July 2012

With all the church problems, I was really regretting not going away to get married - somewhere special and intimate and making really about US. I spent a week crying over the fact that despite promising myself that I'd never have a wedding that OTHERS wanted and let their wishes trump our own, we totally doing things we DON't want to do.
To me, the important thing wasn't the dif between a big or small wedding but rather that we made the day special for US.
After a lot of thought and discussion, we decided that we are still making this day about us because it wouldn't be "us" to not be so considerate. We love our families and we would never want to hurt them. We can still make this day mostly about us and do all the things we want to do; just a bit differently than we had originally planned. I learned to comprimise before marriage - yay lol

em105 · July 2012

Oh girls! Love!

It's a little radical, but I know a few people who get so anxious they actually take a beta blocker (medicine that lowers your blood pressure and sorta chills you out) before public speaking. You can talk to your doctor and PLEASE do a trial if you choose it, but it's a viable medical option.

(we're keeping the wedding where we wanted it- 75-100 people depending on who from out of town can come and who brings guests, etc... my Fiance actually even stood up to his mother when she tried to put a bunch of last minute 'but you have to's on the list when he told her flat out that he didn't know them and that our list was closed on Sunday.)

leeee · July 2012

Hi,

I'm used to get a lot of attention because of the work I do. So I don't have a problem with beiing the center of attention. But for the brides that dont feel confortable with their own wedding: Is it an idea to plan a half hour at your wedding day where you will say your vows, and say yes to eachother, but then only with the two of you? So you get married just with the two of you, and then do it again for the family and friends.

I saw this during an episode of 'how i met your mother' when lily and marshall got married. It was so romantic! You can even ask your parents etc to be with you. Have a secret wedding before the big one, so you don't have to be nervous for the one later, since you allready got married (but no one needs to know... :-P)

All the best for you!

Lee (the Netherlands, sorry for my bad English)

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