this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Pre-wedding Parties
Pre-wedding Parties
New Discussion

Alcohol at the Bridal Shower?

jessandkalebjessandkaleb
10 Comments
in Pre-wedding Parties
I'm the MOH in my friend's wedding. (I'm the MaidOH and she has a MatronOH). She's having two other bridal showers and a couple's shower (I'm only hosting one bridal shower and the bachelorette party). I'm having some conflict with myself pertaining alcohol at the shower and the bachelorette party. Per my religious beliefs I do not drink alcohol nor advocate the drinking of alcohol. I'm hosing the Shower at noon on a Saturday, so I don't feel comfortable buying alcohol for others to drink, although, I'm fine if the ladies would like to purchase the drinks themselves. Is this considered rude? I feel like the shower is too early in the afternoon for alcohol anyways. As for the bachelorette party, I know my friend wants the typical bar hopping scene with drinks and all. I don't want her to pay for her own drinks, and I've offered to be the DD and she knows I don't drink, but I'm not sure how to foot her bill without feeling uncomfortable. Advice on these two issues?
"And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." Genesis 2:23-24
Report Reply to Post

Re: Alcohol at the Bridal Shower?

  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited March 2012
    Where are you hosting the shower?

    If it's at a home, I don't think alcohol is necessary.  I've been to showers with alcohol and without.  I'm not big on drinking in the afternoon so I can't even remember which ones had it and which ones didn't!

    If it's at a restaurant, I might recommend menus with the food and drink choices so people know.  Within the room, I wouldn't have a bar.  If people want to wander out and get a drink at the outer restaurant bar, that's their peroragative.

    As for the bachelorette party - are you going out to dinner or just to bars?  Ideally, all the participants will split the bride's expenses so in reality, you'll probably be paying for one drink and some of her meal.  Is that easier to swallow than thinking you're just buying her drink after drink all night?

    Report Reply
  • jessandkalebjessandkaleb
    10 Comments
    It's at a restaurant, and the owner is a friend of mine. We have a banquet/bar area for the party which will have tons of food/soda/lemonade/tea laid out, so I have that covered, but having drink menus available is a good idea. 
    And knowing that it will probably just be her meal and a drink is definitely much easier to swallow, thank you! :)
    "And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." Genesis 2:23-24
    Report Reply
  • HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_alcohol-at-the-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:b52e88c1-c28f-4c1d-982d-27de56f33a67Post:fd0fac93-ab88-4269-8982-670e8d5dce56">Re: Alcohol at the Bridal Shower?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's at a restaurant, and the owner is a friend of mine. We have a banquet/bar area for the party which will have tons of food/soda/lemonade/tea laid out, so I have that covered, but<strong> having drink menus available is a good idea. </strong> And knowing that it will probably just be her meal and a drink is definitely much easier to swallow, thank you! :)
    Posted by jessandkaleb[/QUOTE]

    It's only a good idea if you are willing to pick up the tab.  You can not expect guest to pay for anything at the shower.  It's fine not to have it at all but it would be rude to have a cash bar.
     
      Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If you don't condone drinking at all then a cash bar is out of line too.

    Either host it or don't.  You don't need to have alcohol at a shower but I can't recall attending any shower where there wasn't alcohol served.
    Report Reply
  • melntaittmelntaitt member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    If you're hosting and paying, you get to determine what is served.

    If it's at a restaurant, I'm not sure how much control you have over people walking over to the bar and ordering a drink on their own unless the owners are specifically instructed that no alcohol is to be served. The last part is the only feasible option I can think of.

    As for the bachelorette party, if you don't condone it, don't pay for it. I'm sure the bride is a big girl that can pick up her own drinks and your other friends drink (?) so they might be willing to.

    Don't sweat it; I wouldn't provide anything I'm not comfortable with either - you shouldn't have to. I'm sure that for a morning/early afternoon shower, the drinks might not even be missed.

    Vacation White Knot
    Report Reply
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    It's fine to serve soft drinks, coffee and tea, only. Just have a food and drink menu printed so the guests will know what you are hosting. If the any of the guests decide to head out to the bar to buy a drink, you should ignore it. I think it's rude for a guest to go to the bar for drinks that are not included, but it would be much ruder for the host to make a fuss over it.

    Banana, maybe it's a regional thing, but most of the showers I've attended have included some kind of alcoholic beverage, too.


                       
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards