On the topic of ring shopping

NurseyK · February 2011

While ring shopping is exciting I s'pose it takes the element of surprise out of the proposal. BF made it clear awhile ago that he wants to pick it out and that he would hope I'll love whatever he picks for me. I'm trusting his instinct because I like the romanticism. Is anyone else on board with this??

(I just pray to sweet baby Jesus that it's not heart shaped!)

[Deleted User] · February 2011

My FI bought my ring completely on his own - no input from me (or my mom). It makes it more special to me because he put so much thought into it.

Oh - and my ring is heart-shaped...it's not what I would have picked, but I wouldn't trade my ring for anything...it's beautiful. He said he picked a heart so that I would always have his heart with me.

motoLyn · February 2011

I've seen girls who have no say in what their ring was, it was all up to their FI to pick out and surprise them. Then there were those who I think were in between where she showed him pictures and styles and he picked one from there and then there were those who we involved in every step of the way.

For me FI picked out three styles he liked and i picked the one I liked the best and that was the ring that he proposed with. It just comes down to the couple. I know some guys who are all into surprising the girl and refuse to go ring shopping. I'm happy that FI went the route he did, because when we were talking afterwards his "vision" of what the ring looked like was not in all what I usually would wear on a daily basis. Not to say that I wouldn't love what ever he gave me, but I like it to go with the rest of my style.

NurseyK · February 2011

Oh god, I didn't mean to be anti-heart in general.... for some people it's the perfect stone. It's just that the word heart is part of my name. (TMI)

peekaboo2011 · February 2011

When we went, BF was at the jeweler before I was because of class/work. He picked out his favorites, and then the jeweler showed me the ones that they had talked about (including the one that I had fallen in love with online) and they exchanged looks several times. So, I have no idea which one I'm getting, but they made me try on two about six times. On the other side though, that was all the input I got. I did pick the jeweler he's going to, and he promised them that he would buy the ring from them when he's ready, so I think they have the one on hold just to make it easier for him in case the company discontinues it or something, but if I ever went in, I'd never have a clue.

tmacwin · February 2011

This is exactly what BF and I are doing. I have given him some ideas of what I would like, but we have not shopped together and I haven't even given him pictures of what I would like. I have actually looked without him with my sister before and they are all so beautiful, I don't think I could be disappointed. I like the element of surprise!

[Deleted User] · February 2011

I really believe each couple is different. In my case, BF wanted to get a feel for what I like. We've stopped in front of store windows and played the "if you could pick any one in the case, which would it be?" game. Just recently he asked if I would try some things on. (We've been together for over 4 years, so this is a new request.) We haven't picked one out specifically...but there's definitely one i'm in love with - and I'm pretty sure he could tell which one that was! Now I'm just trying not to over think things and be patient. I have no idea if he is going to get that ring or not...

I guess, for me, I don't mind if the ring is not a complete surprise...but I don't want to know when the proposal is coming. BF has already said it will never be on a holiday - so I never have any reason to expect...and I like that!

cu97tiger · February 2011

My BF and I went ring shopping once, and have seen some interesting ones in ads, but we've decided that he has enough information and he's going to design it/pick it out with no more input from me. I'm a little nervous, but he has great judgment when it comes to clothes and watches, so I'm sure it will be beautiful.

heyimbren · February 2011

Personally, I love the idea of being totally surprised. I have no interest in going ring shopping at all. We've discussed rings a bit before, but nothing in depth. When it comes to that, I trust him and I want him to pick out something for me. I don't care what it is, because for me it really is the thought behind it.

Kind of like what Angie said, even though she wouldn't have picked a heart shape, she loves it anyways because that's what her FI gave her.

Either way, it's completely up to the couple.

luvdncn90 · February 2011

I have tried on multiple rings, with and without boyfriend. I have sent him pictures of the style of rings I absolutely love and the style of rings that I want. Other than that, I have absolutely no say.

I know that he will not buy the ring with me there. He likes the surprise element, and in the end the ring that I get will be the ring he picks out all on his own. I have simply given him hints about the styles and the types of rings I love. He knows my tastes extremely well, and I trust him completely.

Ring shopping together is always fun, but I really do want to be surprised when he proposes.

Ember01 · February 2011

FI always said he wanted to pick it out on his own.

He asked me one day, what I wanted (we were leaving a friend's wedding) and I had a little too much to drink. My response? I want a "gold ring, with white stuff on it".... His response "You mean white gold?" Me: "Uuuuh, yeah. And NOT heart shaped and no offset diamonds". He still makes fun of me to this day about that conversation. Whenever anyone asks about the ring, he tells them it's gold with white stuff on it.

Then, when the time came, he wanted me to help. So, we shopped. And shopped. And shopped. Until I found what I wanted. He went back and bought it. Yeah, the element of suprise was gone, but I picked out my perfect ring!

jeanacorina · February 2011

We shopped together, we looked online, we discussed what I like and what my style is... and so on.

However, when he bought my ring it was all up to him. I wasn't present, I hadn't picked out anything, I'd given him some pointers (yellow gold being the main one) and he went from there.

I honestly wasn't sure what was going to be inside that ring box. It wasn't at all what I expected (I thought maybe it would be a cushion-cut moissanite, but it was a princess-cut diamond), but it's beautiful. I'm very proud of DH's taste. My only complaint is the ring sits a little high in the setting, but I've gotten used to that now.

SopChick · February 2011

I worked in a jewellery store all through university, so I have a pretty clear idea of what I like and what I don't. The only thing that changed through that time was that my taste got more expensive... I went from wanting a white gold .25ct solitaire, to wanting a platinum .50ct (or larger) solitaire. I also would much prefer quality over size. Obviously though I would love anything, because I'm a sap like that and it's more about the meaning behind it.

BF and I have discussed what we both like and dislike in an e-ring. For the most part we have very similar taste - which actually surprised me, because I thought he would be all about the modern styles, but he's really traditional in what appeals to him. When the times comes to purchase a ring though, it will probably be all up to him. It also surprised me how he had such set ideas about what was acceptable - I once brought up the idea of a sapphire (I love them, and my mom's e-ring was one), and he said that while he likes the stone for other jewellery he doesn't feel it's a 'real e-ring' unless it's a diamond. Go figure, I was trying to save the guy a few bucks... haha

Like the others have said though, it's different for everyone. When I was selling e-rings, I had couples shopping together, girls coming in with friends/family, guys picking alone, guys with cards of what the girl had picked, any number of combinations and never thought any of them were weird.

bethsmiles · February 2011

I've shown BF rings I liked and we've discussed things I want and things I don't. I didn't think it was fair to make him figure out what I like by himself because I don't wear jewelry so he really wouldn't have had anything to go off of. I don't think its taken away any of the element of surprise though because I still have no idea what ring he will pick or when he will propose and I'm sure I will love whatever he will pick.

KayGB2012 · February 2011

FI loves surprises, so I left picking the ring almost entirely up to him. I told him a few things that I did and didn't like, and he picked a ring that I know I would have picked for myself.

He did take me shopping at one point, but he had already bought the ring and proposed two days later. He admitted that he took me shopping mainly to throw me off from expecting to get engaged that weekend. It worked! I never saw it coming.

Elle1036 · March 2011

Haha... I'm one of the girls that was involved every step of the way. I'm a bit of a control freak, and I'm a jewelry minimalist so FI wasn't sure he could trust his opinions of my style. I oversaw every detail of the ring.

Knowing what the ring looked like didn't change the significance or surprise of the proposal.

PaigeMcC · March 2011

I told FBD what I liked and that I wanted white gold. What he got was up to him, I knew he'd make the right choice. And he did, it's WICKED.

desertsun · March 2011

My H didn't want me to go shopping with him, but he DID want some guidance on the Cs and some pics of rings I liked. And my ring size.

He went from there and did a great job.

Again, as I said in the other ring shopping post, everyone is different. That's okay. As long as you talk to each other and figure out the best balance for making you both as comfortable as possible.

futuremrstje · March 2011

My bf knows me well enough that if he were to pick out a ring all on his own I know he'd pick one that I'd like. He's bought me jewlery a few times and everything he's picked out has suited my tastes perfectly. With that being said, there is a ring that since the first time I saw it I fell in love, and I've dropped a few not so subtle hints about it, so I'm hoping that's the one he gets me. If it's not I'll still get it for myself anyways, it'll just be a few years down the road. If I didn't have a ring that I was in love with I'd be fine with him picking something out on his own. I've always figure if he knows me well enough to propose (and I know him well enough to say yes) then he;s gotta know my tastes in jewelery and pick out something appropriate...

lilg058 · March 2011

I've dropped several hints on what I like, and he's pulled me into a few different jewlery stores in the mall etc. to see what I like. I always ask him which one he thinks I like the most, and he picks it, 9 times out of 10. He said he wants to do it all by himself, and I know either way I'll love it. I do want the proposal to be a surprise, but I've also dropped hints on when would be a great time and where, but I'm leaving it up to him. I'm a little worried because he's a total country boy, and he'd be one to ask me at the most, erm..inappropriate? time. But the more I think about it, we could be covered in mud in the middle of the woods and it'd still be romantic. I love him too much to base my love for him on things like that!

paintgirl · March 2011

We've talked about it and we've done some shopping. I don't want to choose the ring but I'm simple - solitaire, not round or heart; white gold or platinum. Done.

kayely88 · March 2011

We went to one jewelry store once and he asked me what I liked. We have discussed ring styles and he went online and asked my opinions on some other rings. But when he goes to buy it I'm letting him go on his own. I do want to be surprised in that sense and I've always liked the idea of the guy buying the ring and what not IMO.

bsidebella · March 2011

I had zero imput on what my ring looked like. Good thing I mentioned I don't like yellow gold. I was unhappy about this at first. Now, though, I like my ring a lot. I would have made the band thinner though because after awhile it hurts to wear it and FI refuses to make changes to it.

calindi · March 2011

We looked at rings together last summer, and I fell in love with a ring... that has since been discontinued and sold out! He wanted to design a ring that looked like it, but isn't sure how to proceed as we have no pictures of the ring.

Recently he's said that he is nervous that I won't like what he picks out, and that he wants to go ring shopping again. I've told him that I'm perfectly happy buying the ring together, even helping him pay (soon enough, all our money will be combined anyway, and I have no problem helping to cover the expense as he has no income as a full time student).

He has turned down my offer for financial assistance repeatedly, but is open to the idea of being together when he purchases the ring or at least selecting it together or designing it together if we choose to have one custom made. The ball is in his court - I'm so low key about the whole thing. He's the one who wants to buy the ring and propose in his own way, so that we'll have an 'engagement story' to share. At the end of the day, it's icing on the cake as long as I have him.

I don't think knowing which ring it is, how much it cost, etc. will ruin anything. At the end of the day, a proposal is the love of your life asking you to spend the rest of your days by their side, partners in life. I don't know how that moment could possibly be ruined!

purplelace · March 2011

My FI picked out the ring without my help. He did have guidance from his dad though, who has really good taste in rings. Before he proposed, we never talked about rings, and I never gave him any advice on it. I figured that when he was ready, he would go out and do it on his time, and I was perfectly ok with that. He did an excellent job though, and I wouldn't trade my ring for anything.

seevansolomon · March 2011

I was about to post about ring shopping, but I saw this. I'm actually planning to shop with my BF because he admittedly doesn't know how to pick jewelry and doesn't know what to look for. I have an heirloom ring that I'd sooner have him use when the time comes, but it may not be able to be restored. I also want to see what's out there. I think it'll be fun to do this together and give him some options. But I definitely am the type that needs to be involved and have some control!

On the topic of ring shopping

Re: On the topic of ring shopping

Choose Another Board

Search Boards