this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Month Club Boards› May 2012 Weddings
May 2012 Weddings
New Discussion

Bad night

tmeyer621tmeyer621
10 Comments Second Anniversary
in May 2012 Weddings
I found out tonight my dad isn't going to dance with me at my reception. Apparantly, dancing in public is a huge phobia for him and he didn't even dance with my mom at their wedding. He isn't budging on the issue either. I'm still insisting FI dance with his mom, but I just feel like I am going to feel like an idiot sitting there during the parent dances because my dad won't dance with me.

Then, during conversation about my rehearsal dinner dress, FI announced lace is for underwear and dresses with lace on them are old fashioned and he doesn't like it....my wedding dress is all lace! He had no idea, but hearing that 2 months before the wedding is not helpful! I know he's going to love the dress on me, but I wished he didn't have such a strong dislike for lace. He's mentioned he didn't like lace before, but for some reason hearing that tonight caused a breakdown. I immediatly started crying and confessed my wedding dress has lace and now he feels like a big asshole. I don't even think he realized lace dresses are in now.
Report Reply to Post

Re: Bad night

  • gpapale1gpapale1
    1000 Comments
    Will you dad dance if you're mixed in a crowd of people?  Maybe you can dedicate a song to him, and just have it at some point during the reception.  No one has to know that it's the official father/daughter dance.

    I think your FI will think you are beautiful no matter what you wear!  He is probably imagining those old Victorian gowns with lace up to the neck, not a modern, fashionable frock.  I would wear what you want, as long as it makes you feel beautiful.  Cheer up, sweetheart! :)
    Future Mrs. K (Planning Bio & Blog) - Updated 5/20/12

    imageWedding Countdown Ticker

    Follow Me on Pinterest

    Report Reply
  • COSmittyCOSmitty
    100 Comments
    Big hugs to you....

    Yeah FI's Mom refuses to dance with him. FI's brother refuses to public speak (so I assured him he doesn't have to do a toast). 

    The reaction I got from FI's mom about the reception was straight out of Footloose.... What? Dancing at a wedding reception (insert scandalized look here).

    So (since my dad passed away) I'm having a dance with my brother, my sister is doing the toast, and family friends will do other parts. I'm vying for his friend to give a toast... 

    Don't worry about looking "normal" there is no normal. Don't worry about perceptions. Maybe just request the song you want during the night and sit with your dad during that time and just have it dedicated?


    Report Reply
  • caitlinc09caitlinc09
    500 Comments
    Sorry you had such a crappy night :(

    My dad has this phobia as well - doesn't sound like he is quite as bad as your dad but I suggested that we practice dancing a couple of times before the wedding so he will be more confident and he seemed to like that idea. Maybe ask your dad if he wants to practice dancing with you/your mom alone and see if it makes him more comfortable with the idea? 

    If he really won't dance at all, maybe have a special tribute to your relationship some other way during the reception. Toast to him, have a slideshow or some other display of pics of the two of you, play a game of some sort?

    Fiances are so silly when it comes to dresses. I know mine accidentally saw a pic of the first dress I got and I asked him what he thought and all he said was "your butt looks good, but that flared out skirt thing looks retarded you should fix that" (referring to the fact that the mermaid shape was weird). Clearly he had no idea what he was talking about and neither did yours! He didn't mean to hurt your feelings and you know he is going to love the way you look no matter what. Cheer up :)
    image
    Report Reply
  • kimberlykhkimberlykh member
    500 Comments
    Sorry!  I like some of the ideas from PP about honoring your dad in another way.  Would you want to dance with your mom?
    Your FI will love you in the dress, and I'm sure he feels horrible.  I bet he was picturing an old-fashioned dress, not the ones that are in style now.
    Hope tomorrow is a better day!
    Report Reply
  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    I'm sorry you had a bad night. I agree with PPs about talking with your dad about doing a non-spotlight dance. I understand that you are upset, as I would be, but I understand where he is coming from. I wouldn't worry about your FI he will love the dress on you. He probably doesn't understand how a wedding dress can be lace.
    imageDaisypath Anniversary tickers
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards