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September 2013 Weddings

please keep your fingers crossed..

This is going to sound like a horrible post
I have posted about FI aunt being sick - she was in the hospital then was transferred to a hospice facility - which was only supposed to be temporary until we could find a nursing home for her and they could evaluate the level of care she needed.... well she has taken a turn for the worse and is basically in the slow process of dying.  She now has no IVs, and they had tried to give her a feeding tube but she tore it out and now her kidneys are shutting down because she is not taking in any fluids and stopped eating several days ago.  Bascially once she realized she was not going to be going home to her house ever again she gave up... literally over night we went from planning for her to be transferred to a nursing home to coming to grips with the fact that she will not be with us much longer at all...

The hospice people say it could be anywhere from a few days to a month.... I hope for FI sake it is not that long---

This is where my post gets selfish - sept 28 is 3 days away - i do not want her to die on sept 28.  our wedding date is pretty much set - can't shift it without losing the deposit and being responsible for an additional few thousand - even if we were to change it by a week - i just do not want my wedding day to the be anniversary of her death too.... its selfish i know - but we already have our "official" dating anniversary - which is the same day that his mom died - not the anniversary of - but the same exact day - it is looking like it is in the cards again
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Re: please keep your fingers crossed..

  • I'm really sorry about your FI's aunt.  I wish her peace and comfort. 

    Obviously you cannot control these types of things but you guys can be there for her and try to make her more comfortable.  My nana was very very unhappy about having to leave her home and also did some distructive things (although she was not nearly as bad as your FI's aunt).  We tried to bring some of her familiar favorite things from home for her to try to ease her mind as much as we could.  It made a slight difference in her behavior.  Visits helped too. 

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!
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  • My thoughts and prayers are also with you, your FI, and your families. Definitely not an easy time, and obviously you want the 28th to be a happy day. Be with her while you can and we'll all be hoping for the best for everyone.
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  • I'm very sorry to hear about your FI's aunt, and I hope that she doesn't have to suffer long.  Thoughts and prayers to you and his family; losing a loved one is never easy.
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  • Thanks everyone! FI is not an overly emotional guy and he is having a rough time especially since both his parents are gone and his either lives 2 hours away from them the daily visits and planning and all fall to him. She really did basically give up when it was set in stone that she was not coming home. It's just a sad situation. Mentally due to oxygen deprivation she is not doing well either. Her lungs got so bad after the last infection they downgraded her to end stage copd but we were still looking at nursing homes because she still potentially had years. And just a word of advice if you do not have life insurance get it... At least enough to cover funeral expenses because she has none ... We are already broke and now have NO idea how we are paying for a funeral. Just sad and stressful.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker ~~December Sept. 2013 Siggy Challenge~~ Now & Then Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • I went through this with my mom. The end of life can be really sad and even tedious, your family is in my prayers.
  • We made It past 9/28.. Thank god. Now it's pretty much a guessing game... Kidneys had seemed to shut down and now they seem to work sporadically... Apparently she is still taking in fluid at some point during the day but no one has seen it... Looks like instead of a week which it has now been it will be more like a month. No one really has any answers and it is getting very frustrating. For now it's like everything is on hold.. Can't make plans for anything for fear we need to be an hour and a half away ... FI hasn't been up here in a month and I can't be down there because I have stuff to take care of here. Now we just wait I guess
    Wedding Countdown Ticker ~~December Sept. 2013 Siggy Challenge~~ Now & Then Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
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