FI and i disagree about the ring

rhythmicgoldfish · January 2012

my FI and i have been engaged for over a year and a half (we have a daughter and i am waiting until she is weaned to start planning) he gave me a beutiful caterdral set roound cut solitaire but... i would like to use the trillion cut sidestones from my mothers ring but i would have to drasticly change the setting of my ring and when i suggested it my FI seemed a bit upset, as though the ring he bought me wasnt good enough

am i being unreasonable or is he being silly?

redheadfsu · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_fi-disagree-ring?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:f9685538-8122-4081-93a7-eb954d978e21Post:67c98e3b-5e65-4cb4-9d1d-73d72053b348">FI and i disagree about the ring</a>:
[QUOTE]my FI and i have been engaged for over a year and a half (we have a daughter and i am waiting until she is weaned to start planning) he gave me a beutiful caterdral set roound cut solitaire but... i would like to use the trillion cut sidestones from my mothers ring but i would have to drasticly change the setting of my ring and when i suggested it my FI seemed a bit upset, as though the ring he bought me wasnt good enough am i being unreasonable or is he being silly?
Posted by rhythmicgoldfish[/QUOTE]

Did you tell him you wanted these diamonds in the ring <strong>before </strong>he bought the ring? If so, ask him why he didn't from the beginning as it was your wish.

But, I think it is kind of mean of you to think he is being silly. (This is coming from a girl that upgraded her setting). Personally, I think both people need to be 100% ok with changing an engagement ring. If he isn't ok with changing it you need to drop it. He spent his time, money, and effort getting you a ring he thought you would love. If he isn't ok changing it then I think you need to let it go.

Britt1893 · January 2012

I agree with the previous posts.

ajzmommy · January 2012

I agree with redhead..
If he didnt know before hand and he took the time to pick it out for you then I wouldnt call him being upset silly. He's a man and men take pride in what they do. If you take that away from him then he didn't do it for you, you changed it for yourself.

1covejack's idea is also nice, just add your mom's diamonds into your wedding band.

Another question that you didnt specify, do you like your engagement ring as is, or your just changing it because you just wanted your mom's diamonds instead?

meganb1977 · January 2012

Agree with pp's suggestions that if he doesn't like the idea of adding your mother's stones to your setting, use them in another piece of jewelry like your wedding band, earrings, or a necklace.

tldh · January 2012

Look at this from his perspective. He picked out a ring that he thought you would love and you are telling him that it is not good enough. I like the idea of using the diamonds from your mom's ring for another piece of jewelry.

MsRachelT · January 2012

I have to agree with everyone here.... Another complementary piece of jewelry sounds like the solution for your mother's diamonds.

Bett2012 · January 2012

ooh, I like the coordinating wedding ring idea!

My FI loves it when I get complimented on my ring.. he says that they're complimenting the ring on the surface, but they're really complimenting him since he's the one who chose it (all by himself!). On the flip side, if people criticized it, or said "it's too small" or "it's not blingy enough" or "i wish it had more on it", he would take that as a criticism not to the ring, but to him, the chooser.

Tread carefully, it's obvious that you don't want to hurt his feelings, so please make that obvious to him by respecting his choice on the ring and trying to use your mom's diamonds elsewhere (unless he comes around by himself!)

WildMagelet · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_fi-disagree-ring?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:f9685538-8122-4081-93a7-eb954d978e21Post:cf48339f-0db1-4b31-9f0c-afdfd26616be">Re: FI and i disagree about the ring</a>:
[QUOTE]What about setting the extra diamonds in a coordinating wedding ring?
Posted by 1covejack[/QUOTE]

+1

FI and i disagree about the ring

Re: FI and i disagree about the ring

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