African American Weddings
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Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)

Ok, so the person I'm referring to in this story might actually lurk on here.  I've never  seen her post...but I really dont care.

One of the weddings hubby and I were invited to this year is for the daughter of a women who is like a grandma to me. We call her (the mom) "Nanna" and she watched my kids for years while I was gong to school and working. So the daughter (A), sent out her invites a little over a month ago for her 7/31 wedding.  Last night I log on facebook and A's status is updated :"A is now engaged to _____ (NOT HER FI's NAME that's on the invitation!).  So, hubby says- go on her page and look at his pic, maybe he just goes by a differnt name. He grabs the STD magnet off the fridge, we look at his pic on FB and it's a totally different dude!  I call "Nanna" and she tells me that A broke up w/ FI on Memory Day weekend and caught up w/ her old flame on FB (her 1st love, the guy who took her virginity) and she is marrying him on the 31st.   A  apperntly announced this to the family last night and she thanked her family on FB for being supportive and undertstanding. "Nanna" is like everyone's saying it's a black soap opera. Now get this: original FI doesn't know that A is marrying someone else AND his family is very pissed at A because they had already paid for thier dresses (apparently some were IN the wedding party) and she cancelled the wedding (well...not really but they think the wedding is cancelled). I told DH I still want to go because I want to catch up w/ Nanna and everyone and honestly they always use this DJ from a NY radio station (that I love) and they always have good food at thier events.  Am I wrong for even taking part in this mess?
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Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)

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    edited December 2011
    That mess is funny. I would go to be entertained!
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    edited December 2011
    Wow that is a crazy story!

    I don't think you're wrong for wanting to catch up with Nanna, but it's crazy that these are the circumstances.  What if her ex-fiancé finds out?
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    ufsweetiebearufsweetiebear member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_this-crazy-ghetto-mess-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:ddb400b5-e6e7-47ff-8685-9b19af3c7674Post:41d94dcb-49c5-44a0-a153-c046ffd3b464">Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]That mess is funny. I would go to be entertained!
    Posted by missrekaeagle[/QUOTE]

    DITTO!
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_this-crazy-ghetto-mess-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:ddb400b5-e6e7-47ff-8685-9b19af3c7674Post:e3941eac-0e70-4c34-9b24-fe2ca2f61f63">Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]What if her ex-fiancé finds out?
    Posted by chayb87[/QUOTE]

    GIRL!!! That is the 1st thing I said. Nanna said..." he's only visited the place once and he was drunk...it's in westchester and he doesn't know that area." 

    HELLO...there's Mapquest. She said they will have security at the hotel.  I did feel bad for the guy but Nanna says he can't keep a job, quits after 2 weeks,  A is paying for the entire wedding and he doesn't contribute (but A should have known how her FI was before she agreed to marry him). I do know that A does work her a$$ off and has a federal job.  Apparently, she packed his bags and said she's had enough.
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    edited December 2011
    Oh wow, I guess it's good that she's not marrying him, but maybe she should wait a while before marrying somebody else.

    Oh well, I agree with PPs, it should definitely be entertaining lol
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    edited December 2011
    Well, glad she found out before marrying former FI.

    I think current FI might be a rebound. But then again, look at Khloe Kardashian...they're making it work after only dating 8-weeks and her mom Kris dated Bruce Jenner for like 6-weeks before they got married and they've been married almost 20-years so who's to say it won't work?

    As for going or not going, girl you know you HAVE to go and come back with all the details (oh and catch up with Nana too :)). I am sure it'll be quite interesting to say the least :-).
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    edited December 2011
    WOW!!! Ghetto Mess indeed! LOL!! Sorry, this is so funny to me!!!! I would go though. It proves to be very entertaining at the least! HA HA!!
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    prncszprncsz member
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    edited December 2011
    WOW!!! This should have been on tv. I would still go though catch up with Nanna, get some good food, possible wedding ideas, and a little entertainment on the side.
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    edited December 2011
    LOL What a mess!! I would definetely go!!
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    edited December 2011
    Personally, I would be afraid that the ex-fiance would show up and a fight could insue and I wouldn't want to be anywhere near that type of craziness.You could possibly be one of the innocent bystanders that gets hurt...sorry to be so pessimistic but I live in Philly so I know all about innocent bystanders getting hurt...
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    desi2002desi2002 member
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    edited December 2011
    idk what i would do.... *akward* Undecided
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    edited December 2011
    I'm so mad I can't get on FB from work...I'm dying to see what other guests are saying. I told hubby "Ya' damn right, if we broke off our wedding and already put out invites, and my family had paid for flights and dreses,etc. I'd get married too!"  I'd marry my kids or something. All I know is SOMETHING would have to take place...family reuinion , whatever, lol!

    One reassuring thing is that Nanna told me she truly feels that  (current FI) is the right man for A and she does have good instincts about ppl.
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    KMB611KMB611 member
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    edited December 2011
    You need to go to that event. It's nice that you want to catch up with Nanna. It might be comedy for you just to see how things play out. The ex FI's family might show up and their could be some interesting conflicts. Go! Go! Go!
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    KMB611KMB611 member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_this-crazy-ghetto-mess-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:ddb400b5-e6e7-47ff-8685-9b19af3c7674Post:79567823-f254-47b0-9d62-a0f36c0785f6">Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long) : GIRL!!! That is the 1st thing I said. Nanna said..." he's only visited the place once and he was drunk...it's in westchester and he doesn't know that area."  HELLO...there's Mapquest. She said they will have security at the hotel.  I did feel bad for the guy but Nanna says he can't keep a job, quits after 2 weeks,  A is paying for the entire wedding and he doesn't contribute (but A should have known how her FI was before she agreed to marry him). I do know that A does work her a$$ off and has a federal job.  Apparently, she packed his bags and said she's had enough.
    Posted by summerbride11[/QUOTE]

    I guess a good song for this situation is Epiphany by Chrisette Michele. LOL
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_this-crazy-ghetto-mess-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:ddb400b5-e6e7-47ff-8685-9b19af3c7674Post:77c45f64-e55e-49d3-87ec-ae5f67e1a105">Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long) : I guess a good song for this situation is Epiphany by Chrisette Michele. LOL
    Posted by KMB611[/QUOTE]

    LOL.
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    cincy2011cincy2011 member
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    edited December 2011
    Go, but make sure you and DH wear your bullet-proof vests!  LOL!  For real, be careful b/c people are crazy these days...I agree with PhillyBride about innocent bystanders!
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    edited December 2011

    Please go and take your camcorder, definitely could be a new show on BET. I have never heard of someone even thinking of doing such a thing.

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    edited December 2011
    This is a hot mess...I personally wouldn't go knowing how crazy people can get (not trying to think negative, but this is real), plus what if he wants to prove a point of being a true losers.   He might think he has nothing to lose.
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    edited December 2011

    WOW!!! This is a hard one. Just like you saw that she is now engaged to someone new on her facebook page, can't the ex and his family see the same thing on her facebook page. What if they do show up to the wedding? Just be careful.
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    edited December 2011
    Be careful, sit near the door or nearest exit. This sounds like a hot mess waiting to boil over. Just like Soaps reality involves bullets and knives. I would be pissed as the fiance to find out she's marrying someone else. First thing come to mind, she was messing around with him all along. Don't get caught inbetween a lovers quarl!


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    edited December 2011
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    edited December 2011
    I just went on her fb page and she has some bible quote as her status now. I'm guessing she has his  family blocked on FB, but you guys are right: some one can always find you (a friend of a friend).  I was just discussing this with DH and he was saying, "If she can't get her money back, she should just have a party or something instead, but he really doesn't condone this- especially because the invitations have someone else's name. What about people who write checks to them for the wedding in the other dude's name? If I were the new guy, I would feel lame.  HMMMMM...I'm gonna have to update you guys on this one.
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    miah_23_ncbmiah_23_ncb member
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    edited December 2011
    wow much drama! but if you want to catch up w/ her and catch a lil show I say why not
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    edited December 2011
    Hey Summer... I know I'm late on this one.. and one thing that you are RIGHT about is.... THIS IS A HOT GHETTO MESS!!!!   and I would not participate!!!!  I'm sorry aint no party or good food worth me potentially jeopardizing my safety and reputation.... Also, yes, Nanna did say that FI #1 really wasn't worth a damn... and that may be true, but A knew that when she was dating him and when she was planning this extravagana.... Second guy may be her 1st and her one true love, but from just the minimal info in the post... he's also the rebound..... I don't know Summer... when emotions are involved and feelings are hightened...anything can happen... What if FI #1 does show up... then what??? What if he is drunk or high or something and acting out of character and something hops off... Who gonna protect you and yours???  Just 'cause he doesnt know where the place is, dont mean he cant FIND the place...Most cars have navigation now anyway.... Dont get me wrong...I'm not trying to be pessimistic or anything...I mean we all gotta be fed and entertained...but this is an emotionally charged situation, being dealt with in a LESS than classy and dignified manner and I would steer clear....(I mean a FB posting...for real?) You and Nanna can catch up with a brunch on a Saturday or Sunday morning just because.... Just giving you some things to think about...  That's just my opinion...
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    KMB611KMB611 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_this-crazy-ghetto-mess-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:ddb400b5-e6e7-47ff-8685-9b19af3c7674Post:9d7d6391-e99c-4d95-baf9-30a3c318848d">Re: Is This Crazy? Ghetto Mess! (Long)</a>:
    [QUOTE]Be careful, sit near the door or nearest exit. This sounds like a hot mess waiting to boil over. Just like Soaps reality involves bullets and knives. I would be pissed as the fiance to find out she's marrying someone else. First thing come to mind, she was messing around with him all along. Don't get caught inbetween a lovers quarl!
    Posted by mahoganieyes[/QUOTE]

    I agree that she may have been messing around with him all along. Just keep your eyes and ears open to anything suspicious that may be occurring.
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    edited December 2011
    OMG! LOL! Hot mess and the bride should have been on a reality show!  I'm thinking more like Flava of Love!  I would go, even for a hot minute, for the entertainment.  Record it and send it to VH1..there reality shows are so far gone...
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