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How do I tell my FMIL I dont want her to stay with me the night B4 the wedding!!!

mlmclassmlmclass member
First Comment
in Moms and Maids
My FMIL is a real piece of work and is extremely difficult!! She has been very persistent on staying with me the night B4 our wedding!!! I"m not sure how to tell her to take a hike. To be honest she is too cheap to get her own room and I know that's why she been sayin she wants to stay with me HELP!!
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Re: How do I tell my FMIL I dont want her to stay with me the night B4 the wedding!!!

  • mysticlmysticl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2011
    Um, explain that because you have so much to do that night and the morning of you have decided to make your home a guest free zone.   That's the best I have.
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  • nikiandchrisnikiandchris
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Do you have other family staying with you? I've been telling people "we already have a full house, sorry!" for months.
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  • hawkeyes00hawkeyes00
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    i wish i could help - but my parents are staying at my house for several nights surrounding the wedding because they refuse to pay for a hotel room (ever really) - so we had to get a hotel room so we don't have to spend our wedding night with my parents. 

    So i guess my suggestion would maybe be to get your own hotel room? or i know it would suck but maybe you could just pay for her room too that way she has no excuse to HAVE to stay with you? 
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Where are you staying? If it is at a hotel, explain to her that you would prefer her get her own room. That you just need to relax the night before with your BM's and try to get some sleep.
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  • tldhtldh member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Has your FI stepped in at all on this and are the two of you living together now?  Is he going to be there the night before the wedding?  Is this a house, apartment or hotel room that you are talking about?  Is anyone else staying with you that night?  People may be able to offer more suggestions if these questions are answered.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Treat her to a hotel room.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • BeeBee22BeeBee22 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Look at this as the first time you and your FI are going to have to stand up to this difficult woman as a team. From your post, I get the impression she will be an ongoing "piece of work", so better to get started dealing with her now. 

    When you have kids (if you plan to), it'll get more complicated, so now is a good time to set some ground rules and boundaries in your relationship with her. 

    The ladies above have given you some good ideas.  Together with your FI, decide the best way to keep her from taking over your night before. Get her a room, tell her you need the time to yourself (and have your FI back you up), whatever. FWIW, this is a very weird request on her part, so no one will be surprised that you don't want her there. Good luck to you!
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    This is pretty easy. Make reservations for her at a hotel and tell her it's a gift from you and fi.
                       
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  • Muffin'sMomMuffin'sMom
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    What Trix and Maire said.  Your fiance JOINS you in telling her no and that you are getting her a hotel room as a gift.  It will DEFINITELY be worth the money and will set the idea of a united front.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
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  • lalalinnylalalinny
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I have a pushy pushy pushy FMIL too. Nothing this extreme, but I feel your pain. My FH and I have been living together for over 2 years now, so we've already had the talk about how he needs to be on my side once in a while. This is a great place for both you and hubby-to-be to set boundaries, I wish I'd done it earlier myself!
    http://adamandlindsay.weddingwindow.com
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  • Kristin789Kristin789 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You don't tell her anything.
    FMIL is FI's problem.  HE tells her.
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  • mlmclassmlmclass member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    thanks for all the suggestions and ideas girls :)
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