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Reception Dinner - What do you think??It is wrong?

clevelandcutieclevelandcutie
10 Comments
in Ohio-Cleveland
I need opinions,please.

After putting off getting married (2 years) due to financial reasons we decided to just go ahead and start planning. Neither of our families are financially capable of
contributing to help, and as many of you girls know - this is a lot to take on when you are barely making ends meet .

We were going to do heavy appetizers, but the owner of the hall said she wanted to give us a break and offered us a full sit down dinner (entree (1) , potato, veggies, salad & roll  - and included the bar as long as we stick with one entree (which would be chicken marsala) .  We are allowed exceptions for vegetarian and gluten free . It was a deal too good to be true! The total bill will be under $4000for everything!

We were thrilled about this , but then my mom called and said that it was not "thoughtful" to only offer one option. She said that people may frown upon this. She asked how much more it would be and I explained at least $1500 more.
She got very quiet and I told her we could not pay that much extra. It ended at that.

Is my Mom right? I thought it would be nicer to give guests a dinner opposed to appetizers. Please let me know what you think.

Thanks (:
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Re: Reception Dinner - What do you think??It is wrong?

  • skye83skye83 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    IMO You need to do whatever is in your budget. sure it's nice to have a couple choices but if it's not in the budget then don't. As a guest I would think 1 entree would be better then a few appetizers. Your mom needs to understand that or find a way to pay the difference herself. But that's just my opinion. o whatever you can live with.
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  • kaederosekaederose
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Chicken = option most people pick anyway.  Not me, I usually go beef (and then wish I hadn't...)

    As long as you're allowed options for dietary restrictions, I see no problem with only doing one entree.
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  • l337Jacquil337Jacqui member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    one option is not rude at all!!!! i have been to a few weddings where there is one option, and why would i ever complain? GO FOR THE ONE OPTION AND SAVE YOURSELF THE  FINANCIAL HEADACHE! :) i think it's so nice the caterers want to help you like that :)
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  • jaylii9jaylii9 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I don't think you are being rude at all. Chicken is a crowd pleaser and if someone has a specil request they can get vegetarian or gluten free. I say that you do what your budget allows and not worry about it. If your mom brings this up again I would explain that one entree is perfectly fine and anything else is not in the budget. If she wants another entree she needs to pony up the funds.

    I learned during my planning process that there is absolutely no point to running around in circles trying to please everyone, because that's just impossible! Don't stress, a chicken entree sounds great!
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  • lmb1976lmb1976 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    YOu can get a sit down dinner @ Blue Point for $40 a per person and the guests can pick from 6 choices when they arrive. I don't know how many people you're having but they can hold 60 people in their room.  I highly suggest checking into it.
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  • dinseptdinsept
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    One option is perfect!! And the guest will really like the fact that you are having a sit-down-dinner....also head to ETSY.com for great cheap finds on all things wedding. You can even place a bid on things you need...I placed a bid for 2.00 programs and got them made custom for me ....eight pages long...you can do a one page for .95 ...
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  • dgarofalo08dgarofalo08
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with the other posts! One entree is not rude at all! If your guests want to share in your special day they should be happy with whatever meal you offer them!! My FI and I purposely chose a menu that did not require several options (we ended up doing family style) because we didn't want the extra work of recording which guest is getting which meal.
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  • kaehaszkaehasz member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If you have not booked your hall yet, look into Ahern's in Avon Lake... Our prices are coming out to around $30 pp and that includes tax and gratuity - a lot of places seem to have a good deal on plates, but you always have to keep into account the tax and gratuity.

    On another note, who the heck cares what you serve? The point of the ceremony is to celebrate with your family and close friends, not for you to provide them a 5 course meal! At the end of the day, people will not remember what food you served or didn't... they will remember the special time that they had at your wedding.  Don't let other people try to convence you otherwise.  I know it's difficult, but it's your wedding and you can't please everyone (especially parents).  You have to think what will work best for you and your fiance not everyone else.  Your mother is probably only worried about your happiness and wants you to have the wedding of your dreams.  Stay true to yourself and what works for you and you will definitely have the wedding of your dreams!

    Good Luck!!!!
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  • amosher20amosher20
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with all the other posts, having one option is not rude. Do what is within your budget! I am having the same problem with my fiance's parents, they keep suggesting the most expensive options but yet have not offered any financial assistance.
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  • stacyc19791stacyc19791 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think it's wrong at all, you are including your friends and family because you want them to be part of your big day.  You could cut down your guest list and offer the second option but I'm sure you aren't.

    The point of a wedding is for them to be their when you two join your lives together.  Food/drink/location/gifts should take a back seat.

    You are doing what you can afford and with this economy everyone should understand.

    Good luck!
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