African American Weddings

Bridesmaid dress shopping

My BMs went with me this weekend to do some dress shopping for them. It was a great day. We looked at a lot of dresses and had lunch. I love spending time with them, BUT....You know there had to be a BUT. The dresses they picked out are so ugly. They was all happy and trying things on and I sat there smiling but feeling really sick in the inside. They are the most uooogly dresses to me and I did not have the heart to break it to them. All but one of my BMs are chunky girls over the size of 18 (we call ourselves the Fluffy Divas of Duplin County). They tried on a lot of dresses and they pick the satin David bridal with the rushing and this ugly fan one strap (no offense to anyone who have picked this dress) I wanted something that was affordable, but nothing to satin. We are going to keep it long because they tried on short and all of those donks where everywhere and long just looked elegant. I thought we should have chiffon and two tone for the vision of my weddings. I told them they could pick their dresses as long as it is not to out there. I tried to steer them to something else, but they loved them. They do look good on the girls figure and plus size. They picked the safest butt ugly dress they could find. I love them but don't want to hurt anyone feelings. How can I tell them no, but not go back on my word or hurt anyone feelings? Tell me what you think about them..
BM (color will be cornflower)
www.davidsbridal.com/Product_One-Shoulder-Satin-Ballgown-with-Fan-Detail-F14430_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-Long-Bridesmaid-Dresses">
This is what the junior BM picked
www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Satin-One-Shoulder-Dress-with-Ruched-Waist-84333_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-All-Bridesmaid-Dresses">
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Re: Bridesmaid dress shopping

  • edited December 2011
    If you don't like them then you have to tell them.  These are going to be in your wedding pictures forever.  Go back and keep trying on dresses until you find something you all like.  My BM ain't skinny either so we were all over the place looking.  I ended up pick the dress in the end.  It was the one that I thought looked the best on all of them.  It was a DB dress as well.  It looks good on the plus size girls.  Plus my girls are all wearing black which will help a little more.  I'm plus size as well so I understand them wanting to feel comfortable but they need to look good as well.   GOOD LUCK!

    http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Soft-Crinkle-Chiffon-Halter-with-Draped-Cascade-F12688
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree with Cat.

    Maybe you should pick out about 5 styles that you really like and let them choose from there; that way, they're still choosing their dress, and you're guaranteed to be happy with their choice.

    I would NOT (under any circumstances) let my BMs wear a dress I didn't like. (FWIW, I don't love the dresses, but I don't think they are ugly. But if you don't like them, don't let them wear them).

    Idk what the heck I'm gonna do when it comes time to pick my dresses. I want long dresses, but my sisters are all short so they hate long dresses (and I'll admit they look better in shorter styles). One has huge breasts, another has huge hips and behind, my 2 cousins are 6 ft tall, while my sisters are 5 ft or less... lol. I'm in trouble.
  • edited December 2011

    I gave my girls the choice on what dress they wanted.. i gave them the restrictions (satin, long, and black) the dress all of them ended up loving just so happened to be the same one so it worked out. 
    Since it is your wedding, you do have the right to say "i would prefer this or that"  you are still giving them options but you get the last say so. 

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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bridesmaid-dress-shopping?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:8e1294fe-5591-4f00-b49d-bfc6a6bb9c4cPost:8dab827c-58d2-44fe-af8a-80ea253e8f11">Re: Bridesmaid dress shopping</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with Cat.<strong> Maybe you should pick out about 5 styles that you really like and let them choose from there; </strong>that way, they're still choosing their dress, and you're guaranteed to be happy with their choice. I would NOT (under any circumstances) let my BMs wear a dress I didn't like. (FWIW, I don't love the dresses, but I don't think they are ugly. But if you don't like them, don't let them wear them). Idk what the heck I'm gonna do when it comes time to pick my dresses. I want long dresses, but my sisters are all short so they hate long dresses (and I'll admit they look better in shorter styles). One has huge breasts, another has huge hips and behind, my 2 cousins are 6 ft tall, while my sisters are 5 ft or less... lol. I'm in trouble.
    Posted by teamUS2012[/QUOTE]

    This....It allows them the freedom to choose a dress that fits their own personal style, but they are also gowns that you like.
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  • edited December 2011
    Well the dresses aren't all that bad, but if it isn't the look or style you envisioned, then definitely let your girls know.  I agree with pp, you should choose a few dresses you really like and then have your girls pick among that selection. 
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