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Second Weddings

My first his second wedding

I just got engaged a few weeks ago, we set the date and location. I always imagined getting married in a Catholic church. People are telling me that no priest will marry us because my fiance is divorced. Does anyone know Catholic churches that will marry us?

Re: My first his second wedding

  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011

    Congratulations on your engagement! 

    The best advice I can give is to go to the pastor at your parish and discuss it.  If your fiance was married in the Catholic Church, divorced and had that marriage annulled by the Catholic Church, you might be okay to marry in the Church.  If your fiance was married in the Catholic Church, divorced and did not have the marriage annulled, you might not be okay.  If your fiance was not married in the Catholic Church, you might be okay. 

    So ... the ever irritating "it depends" is the only answer I can give.  Your parish priest is the best resource for a definitive answer.

    In my case, because I did not have my marriage annulled (I was married in the Catholic Church), I cannot marry again in the Catholic Church.  It is no problem for my fiance to get married in the Catholic Church though, because both of his marriages were civil ceremonies.

  • edited December 2011
    Is your FI Catholic?  If your FI is NOT catholic you can marry in the catholic church. Even if he was divorced.  However, if you are both catholic, the only way you can marry in the church is if he was granted an annulment.  You wont find a catholic church that will marry you, but other catholic religions will.  You can marry in a Presbyterian and Episcopalian church.  
  • edited December 2011
    Arv - I doo not think what you wrote is correct.  I believe the Catholic church recognizes the validity of any marriage, thus requiring an annulment.
  • mswood1977mswood1977 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It does not matter if your FI was married in the Church or not in the church, if he was previously married, the prior marriage would have to be resolved before you would be able to marry in the Catholic church.  You need to speak with your priest. 

    If he is Catholic and married outside of the church he would need to apply for lack of form annulment (fairly simple and quick), if he is Catholic and married in the church he would need to apply for a full annulment (this could take months or even years depending on the diocese and there is no guarantee that the annulment will be granted, my husbands took about 9 months).  If he is not Catholic and he had a valid civil marriage he would still need a full annulment to be able to marry in the Catholic church.  The other option for non-Catholics only applies if your FI and his ex-wife where both un-baptized at the time of their marriage.  If they where both un-baptized, and remain un-baptized and the marriage fell apart due to no fault of your FI, if he wishes to be baptized Catholic, he could apply for the Pauline Privilege which dissolves a valid natural marriage in favor of a new sacramental marriage (which is what I used to dissolve my first marriage). 

    The best thing for you to do is speak with a priest as soon as possible. 
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  • edited December 2011
    Thank you Right1this time, I stand corrected. 
  • edited December 2011

    The best move is to talk to your priest since he will be the one that is ultimately making the decision to marry you.

    My priest is not willing to marry a couple that lives together prior to marriage but other priests are.  I think there is room for the priests to make their own decision and some are more lenient than others.

  • pretzelgrrlpretzelgrrl member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Unfortunatly...it is not the priests choice about whether a marriage needs to be anulled...my priest thought we would be able to get married in a catholic church because my fiance was married in a hotel by a rabbi and he is not catholic.  But, the diocese or higher-ups said no you need and anullment which takes a year to 2 years so we are getting married in a unitarian church.
     

    Anniversary
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