How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning?

christinkg · October 2010

All of this wedding planning combined with the stress of my very demanding full-time job have me feeling tired and overwhelmed lately. I'm frustrated that it feels like my job is so demanding of my time that I can't enjoy my once-in-a-lifetime wedding prep.

Here's more of my rant: http://mycasualwedding.com/2010/10/25/busy-busy-me/

Anyone else feeling the same way? How are you coping?

mrscarter052011 · October 2010

Right now I work full-time, go to grad school and have a 5 year old daughter. We also just bought a house that needs some work. Even before I was planning a wedding people would ask how I juggle it all. The simple answer is that I prioritize and make lists. You have to decide what is the most important to you and focus on that.

For instance, I have simplified my wedding planning by focusing on what we (me and FI) were most concerned with and let the other little things go. There is no checklist I can give you because everyone is different and what we considered to be little things/details may not be little to you. So relax and talk to your FI about what you both want and go from there.

aerinpegadrak · October 2010

Planning a wedding is not a magical, blessed rite of passage. It's making arrangements for a party. Perhaps lowering your expectations of the "experience" would be a good place to start.

But nice attempt at disguising a blatant plug for your blog.

mrscarter052011 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_coping-hectic-work-schedule-wedding-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:b44d5b1b-088a-4ec1-92c7-fd4344e3f36aPost:2ea2933b-608e-43fc-af5f-0a1c70620f0a">Re: How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning?</a>:
[QUOTE]Planning a wedding is not a magical, blessed rite of passage. It's making arrangements for a party. <strong> Perhaps lowering your expectations of the "experience" would be a good place to start. But nice attempt at disguising a blatant plug for your blog.</strong>
Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

Wait, does this mean I have to cancel the unicorn rides that I had scheduled? <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

Edit: Just read the blog and she does plan on pony rides.

Manwaithiel · October 2010

It's just a party. The other things in your life take up your time because *drumroll* they ARE more important and should be treated as such.

If you're in the position where you really can just obsess over wedding details and not worry about your life, then great. If not, then understand it's one day out of the 46729583 other days of your life and it doesn't matter that much in the grand scheme of things.

NillaWafer10 · October 2010

Hire a wedding planner. They can help loads.

marissa_claire · October 2010

Uh, if you're life is so busy then why are you spending time creating a blog and plugging it on the Knot?

mattycam · October 2010

Everyone has other responsibilities!! You just prioritize and have good organizational skills. If you lack in those areas, then hire a wedding planner.

ehathewa · October 2010

I quit my stressful job and got a nice new one!

Also, I kind of quit caring about a lot of the wedding stuff. I didn't really care what the cake exactly looked like or my hair or the flowers. Basically, I just wanted to get married, have a good time, and have my friends and family there.

lindsaynewbride10 · October 2010

First, I will answer your question- I cope with the two different "lives," meaning my full-time job and then wedding planning, by setting aside "wedding time" with my fiance. There is about 45 minutes to an hour everynight that if there is something to discuss pertaining to the wedding, we'll talk about it then. If not, then we just don't have anything to talk about for the wedding, which is sometimes a relief. I guess it kinda depends on where you are in your planning, if you're just getting started and have 9-12 months to go, then maybe you're not as stressed and rushed as someone who has less than 6 months to go. When it comes down to it, you have to prioritize it, and makes lists if necessary. I think that'll help.

Secondly, I am SO tired of coming to a message board about something I can actually relate to and be excited to discuss it, and while reading down the posts in response to the OP, I see nothing but negative comments, the most hateful things to say, and I just have to say it's disheartening. Seriously. if you don't like the OP or don't have something positive to contribute- why say anything?!?

HobokensFury · October 2010

News Flash- We're all busy and stressed. Either make time for wedding planning, or postpone until you have time.

lindsaynewbride10 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_coping-hectic-work-schedule-wedding-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:b44d5b1b-088a-4ec1-92c7-fd4344e3f36aPost:3d5d761a-c096-4c74-8c31-f26f8f030c0d">Re: How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning? : I'm so tired of people watching too many wedding shows and getting this ridiculous notion in their head about magical planning experiences. It. is. a. party. A party. An important party to be sure. But a party nonetheless. If you're not mature enough to know that the world doesn't stop just because you want to do some wedding planning, then you sure as hell aren't mature enough to get married. Your responsibilities don't just end and if you're upset that they don't let up because of your pretty princess day, you have issues. I mean, we could have said, "Neglect your job and just focus on the wedding, honey! Don't worry about your boss, he'll understand that you have important things like table linens and hor d'eourves to stress over. If he fires you, whatever, right? At least you'll have gotten months of wedding ecstasy with no money to pay for any of it." Get real.
Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]

Who said anything about telling her to quit her job to plan her wedding?! I certainly didn't, that would be insane. All I'm saying is that I think it's a fair question to ask: how do you juggle your life/work with wedding planning?! Simple as that. It frustrates the hell out of me when people make comments to the most innocent of questions like these- and then to go on and say that they aren't ready to get/be married? C'mon. Apparently your parents didn't teach you the saying "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

JadziaDax · October 2010

I work full time and i'm in grad school full time. FI and I planned a wedding date for 2012, 2 years after our engagement (now it's more like a year and 3 months) and we're giving ourselves time to plan the wedding- I'll be done with school so at least for 2 months prior it won't be too overwhelming. Just give yourself time, plan little things here and there and do things on weekends, like research or speaking with vendors.

christinkg · October 2010

To those of you who gave it, thanks for the advice, ladies! Also, to those of you who apparently think I think I’m in a fairytale world – I’m not. My FI and I have a 16-month engagement because I knew that it would be a lot of work to plan an out of town wedding while having my job.

Unfortunately, I can’t afford to hire a wedding planner, but even if I could, I don’t know that I’d want to. I love planning parties – I plan them all the time for my friends – this one is just bigger. I’m not naïve enough to think that the world is going to stop around me, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t get frustrated on some days. I was certain that every bride gets overwhelmed or stressed at some point and I was just asking my fellow brides how they coped.

Also, yes, I do have a blog and, yes, I did write about my frustrations there. I’m a writer, trying to express myself. If you’re offended by me posting a blog post in a discussion board then don’t read it.

Manwaithiel · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_coping-hectic-work-schedule-wedding-planning?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:b44d5b1b-088a-4ec1-92c7-fd4344e3f36aPost:19672d68-93dd-482a-86eb-e5cf7c81f9ed">Re: How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning?</a>:
[QUOTE]I really don't get how/why people get stressed over planning a wedding. It doesn't really take that long to pick out an invitation or flowers or whatever. And I don't really know what the heck FI and I would discuss for an hour every night. We rarely talk about the wedding b/c there's nothing to discuss. I don't thnk FI gives a crap if I carry roses or lilies or if the table linens are black or orange or neon pink. Grab a checklist - there are plenty of them out there - and make a decision. If you've got the ability to make a decision, then there's not much to stress over. <strong> If you've got time to blog and post on boards, then you've got time for a job and planning a party.</strong> If I were that stressed, I would eliminate the time I spent doing unnecessary activities.
Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]

This.

How are you coping with a hectic work schedule AND wedding planning?

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