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Christian Weddings

Opinions? (FB related)

I've heard lots of stories on TK about FB problems with wedding planning, so I've been very careful not to talk about wedding information on FB. All we did was change our status when we got engaged, but absolutely no other public information. . . .

I used to live in FL while working on my master's degree and I got to know a few ladies at my church (I was only there for 2 years). I wasn't really close with any of them, but did play in the orchestra at Christmas time with one particular lady. Well, after living in FL, I moved to KY for six months to finish school and then moved across the country to NM where FI lives. I've never kept in touch with any of these ladies since I moved away from FL 1 1/2 years ago, except they see my FB updates. (They're nice ladies so I have no reason to de-friend them).

Yesterday, one of these ladies posted on my FB page asking when the wedding was (she saw my "changed relationship status"). I guess it didn't occur to her that my homepage is public to all my FB friends, so I politely sent her a private message and told her it would be in June (no other specifics, not even the exact date - she's not invited and I don't want to give the wrong impression). I left it at that, but today, I got the following message: "That is so exciting. I am so thrilled for you. Everything is going good here. I really missed playing my flute for the holidays, but such is life. Can't wait to hear the details."

Um, what "details" do you want to hear? I'm hoping she's just making conversation, as ladies often do, and is not really expecting more info. So, your opinions - should I not respond and hope she gets the hint? Should I respond, but just say something like "still working on the details, not much to say yet" (which is actually true), or something else? Thanks for your advice!

Re: Opinions? (FB related)

  • I don't think she's looking for a wedding invite, she's just genuinely interested in your life. I would be really offended and wonder if I said something wrong if you just didn't respond. Anyone over the age of 15 understands that weddings aren't a time to invite all your FB friends. If you haven't remained close with her-- especially after a year and a half, I think she understands that she won't be receiving an invite and won't be offended.

    We posted quite a bit of information on FB. Not explicitly, but a link to our wedding web page so everyone can see what's going on, but we did add a thing on the website about needing the wedding to be invitation only due to venue limitations. 

    GL!


    PostCeremony-131.1
  • Thank you! I agree - she's probably just trying to be nice and is excited for me, but doesn't expect an invite.
  • . . . I just responded back to her and focused on our orchestra connection, then mentioned a little about the wedding and that we haven't planned much yet (which is actually true, so I hope to get a lot done over Christmas break!) Laughing

  • When people used to say that to me (on FB) they usually meant they looked forward to seeing some pics of my wedding.

  • Pretty sure she just wants to know how the planning is going and stuff. Be honest with her, tell her you haven't decided too much but you are thinking such and such. She's just being a nice lady and making conversation.
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  • Thanks again! I think y'all are right.
  • Sounds like you did the right thing!

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  • It sounds like you handled it well!
  • I would ditto the PPs. You are smart not to put much on your main page about the wedding though. I've pretty much avoided doing that as well, because I hate when others on my FB friends list do it. That's what TK is for, right? ;)
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  • I've had a couple of people ask for details publically on FB as well. However, I even have some family members (also "friends" of mine on FB) that will not be invited (mainly due to putting my parents in a terrible situation, cleaning up after their irresponsibility & messes) so I've PM'd them as well with info. Most of them know my situation so they understand but some, like you, I have been very generic what I share with them. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_opinions-fb-related?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:430e5597-e6a1-49b0-b270-a03ec49905d6Post:335dc254-6989-47b1-bba2-5ec26b978571">Re: Opinions? (FB related)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would ditto the PPs. You are smart not to put much on your main page about the wedding though. I've pretty much avoided doing that as well, because I hate when others on my FB friends list do it.<strong> That's what TK is for, right?</strong> ;)
    Posted by musicalsunlight[/QUOTE]

    Exactly! :)
  • edited December 2011
    [QUOTE]I would ditto the PPs. You are smart not to put much on your main page about the wedding though. I've pretty much avoided doing that as well, because I hate when others on my FB friends list do it. <strong>That's what TK is for, right? ;)
    </strong>Posted by musicalsunlight[/QUOTE]

    "Like"  :)
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