African American Weddings

NWR: My heart is breaking for my DH family LONG

Well my Husband has lost another Cousin to the streets of the so called City of Brotherly Love! I am from Philadelphia and no offense to the Philly Knotties, but I WILL NEVER return to that city. I used to love my Hometown, I used to defend it to the fullest, but to see the young people there, waisting away their lives to these streets just kills me. I have 2 yes two brothers in prison because they thought the street family was better than the 6 figure income family they were from. Now my Husbands family has lost another Child to the same streets! He was a baby in our eyes, under 25 with 3 kids and he could have had a better future than his current life, and yet he choose the streets over his family, yes this young man could have changed his life around and made better choices but now he will never get that chance. My DH lost his other cousin last summer to another senseless shooting that was not intended for him AT ALL, his death being that he was an only child,and he only has one child was DEVASTATING to the family, his death was unexpected in every sense of the word, he was loved by everyone he came in contact with, he was a problem solver not  a problem maker, he never raised his voice, and he had a calming affect on people, his death till this day is hard for us. Its hard to see his son( spitting image) its hard to look at photos of him with out braking down, hell we can barely say his name without getting choked up, ( i am tearing up now). His life too taken away wayyyy to early and whats left is a 3 year old who will never know his father.
 
Now you never get good news when a phone rings at 5am EVER! and for that to be the news we got 5am this morning is not how we planned on spending our day, its not how we planned on enjoying the time until our wedding. I hate waist and thats all this was, a waist of a life, and when will people realize YOU DONT COME BACK FROM DEAD!!!!

My DH family again is devestated and hurting I just ask you all keep our family in your prayers.

Thanks for letting me share.

Re: NWR: My heart is breaking for my DH family LONG

  • winter443winter443 member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I will keep your DH's family in my prayers. It's so sad that so many young black men are ending up dead or in prison...senseless
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  • edited December 2011
    So sorry for the loss of your loved one. My prayers to your DH family. I hope that young black men will begin to see the streets for what they really are, NOTHING.
  • OFFOFF
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It is always heartbreaking to lose someone especially to senseless violence.  I'm sorry for your DH loss.   
  • edited December 2011
    I am so sorry for your loss.
  • essianessian member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    What a sad story! Sorry to hear about your loss. I would keep y'all in prayers.Stay strong!

  • edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I will keep your family lifted in prayer. I hope that this strengthens, rather than lessens, your faith in God because He will definitely be the one to get you all through your grief. I send prayers of comfort and peace for your family.
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  • edited December 2011
    I am sorry for your family's loss.  We must continue to pray for our youth, that they will seek the right path and stray from the traps the devil has set for them.  They definitely need to open their eyes and discover what life is truly about. 
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  • TINAMMTINAMM member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thank you it means so much ladies.

    Our son will be 13 on saturday and we are teased often by our Philly family that are children are "sheltered" or "white" and you know what I would rather have my children sheltered and safe than exposed to too much too soon.  Our children did not spend much time living in Philly and although our daughters were born there will lived outside the city in the burbs and thats the way we plan on keeping it. Children do not and should not be exposed to 90% of the things they are now adays. I just pray that these young people realize what they are risking, not just their futures but their lives and without life you have no future.
  • edited December 2011
    You guys are in my prayers....
  • edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry for your loss - you guys will be in my heart and prayers!
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  • tamtam7tamtam7 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am so sorry to read this Tina.  I wish your family (DH family) much peace through these very difficult times.  My thoughts are with you and DH family.
  • edited December 2011
    My thoughts and prayers to you and your family.  You and your DH did exactly what my parents did, raised us in the suburbs.  My raised my sisters and I on the Main Line and I am too familiar with being called "white" and stuck up by my black counterparts. 
    Yes, Phila is crazy but, it is the culture of the streets we have to fight, not one particular area. The same culture is found in Camden, NJ, Washington, DC, and other metro areas in the US.  The senseless killing has to stop everywhere!  I am saddened to hear of your loss but also optimistic his death does not have to go in vain.  Maybe, just maybe, his death has caused someone to place down his or her gun or caused someone else to look beyond the city's invisible limits and see what awaits in the world, or maybe a legacy in the form of a scholarship fund will be created.  I have three young nephews and stand with you, your family, and the ladies on this board to do my part to educate young black men about the limitless potential they truly have!

    I pray God keeps and strengthens you and your family during this time and always.
  • edited December 2011
    I am so sorry the loss of your loved one. DH and family are in my prayers.
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  • ladylumladylum member
    500 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Sorry to hear about your loss! And Rhoyal, I too was made fun of for being too "white" and bougie. Hearing stuff like that makes me so mad because the world is exposed to so much more than it used to be and people have options to make! All the young men I talk to, both black and white, think the streets are where they can earn cred. My brother talks to other young men to let them know the real deal. The only thing we can do is reach out to as many young people as we can and hope they make the right decision.
  • TINAMMTINAMM member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    RHOYAL- you are totally correct I do have hope that these deaths will make these young men think twice about their actions.

    You know what I am Stuck up, as much as I try not to be though because that is how my parents raised us but like I said earlier that life wan't what my 2 younger brothers wanted and I can't understand why. Why would you choose a life of struggle and criminal activity? This is not scareface this is real life!  Being the way I am is one of the reasons my DH married me because I am NOTHING like the girls he knew growing up, I opened his mind to the world and not just the box that most inner cities try to keep you in.  My DH never heard of Sienfeld before he met me, he never would have listened to Classical music, nor the rock songs he now knows better than me, and I would have not known Good Times, and Martin and Wu Tang if it weren't for him because I was not raised watching or listening to those shows or music on a regular basis.

    So again I do have so much faith and hope for the future of our young and that they realize there is so much this world has to offer for them.
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