Bride wants guests to take out the trash at wedding
http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/tribu/askamy/ct-ae-0425-amy-20120425,0,1818772.column
CN: A wedding guest wrote in to ask about a friend's wedding. He and his wife recieved an email stating that they'd been signed up for "clean-up committee" after the reception because they are responsible and married (thus, won't be otherwise indisposed having a drunken wedding hookup after the wedding), and because "you are kind of bossy and I like that." Oh but, they can totally feel free to turn it down, no hard feelings....
Hilariously awful.
Dear Amy: My wife and I are attending a wedding next weekend. We are friends with the bride and groom, but not best friends. We received an email stating that we and another married couple have been "signed up" for the clean-up committee.
The bride is catering her own wedding and using a rental kitchen. She just sent us an email saying she had assigned us to move tables and chairs, take out garbage and sweep the floor after the reception has ended.
The part that really gets me is where she gave reasons for asking us to do this task: "You are responsible; you are part of a long-term committed relationship (so I won't be preventing an inebriated wedding stranger hookup); and I trust you to wrangle others to help — you are kind of bossy and I like that."
She also says, "Feel free to decline this assignment with no hard feelings. Just let me know."
How does one respond to such an email? Also, have you ever heard of a bride even doing such a thing?
— Unsure of a Response
Dear Unsure: This is a new one. The bride's primary mistake, at least in my mind, is the tone of her request. I think she is trying to be wry and funny. But, as I have learned, comedy is best left to the professionals.
When you are asking people to literally take out your trash, the best way to do it is to throw yourself on their mercy and basically implore them to forgive you for the request. Instead, she went another way — insulting you by calling you bossy, etc.
You could call her on this by responding, "Wow. What a lovely offer. Who wouldn't jump at the chance to take out your trash?"
She is also giving you the opportunity to decline. I could supply you with the answer I once received when I asked a guy I didn't know well to attend a wedding with me: "Oh — I'd love to, but I don't think I have the right shoes."
Re: Bride wants guests to take out the trash at wedding
[QUOTE]I read this the other day. "I don't think I have the right shoes" is going to be my go-to response from now on. :P
Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]
Same here!
I agree, I like the show comment. I don't think I'd be going to that wedding at all. If she's asking guests to clean up, I'm sure she'll do other rude things.
SaveSave
Wow. I'm pretty sure I would change my RSVP to no after receiving that email. "Sorry, Bride, we are no longer able to make it to your wedding as something has come up. Best of luck finding other trash collectors!"
A friend of mine is getting married a month after I am. She saw the paper flowers I hung from the ceiling at my birthday party and exclaimed, "PK, you can make those for my wedding! They're so pretty! Your FI is in the WP so you'll have to be up there early anyway!" I was drunk and didn't know how to respond so I didn't say anything, but to give you an idea, I hung them from the ceiling of the living room of our 750 sq. foot apartment - and making those alone took me a good 8 hours. Enough to fill a reception hall? She better be paying me.
Rambley Blog
My ex got remarried in a (what I've heard) lovely outdoor ceremony. Him and new wife took off, then so did the other guests. That left his dad, stepmom, mom, stepdad, and our kids to pack up all the stuff and clean up the trash. The kids told me later that "Dad got pissed because he thought more guests would stay and help." Really?
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bride-wants-guests-to-take-out-the-trash-at-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e3f7ce6-d36c-4da9-b32a-9f3c2d59fdd7Post:7559a0e2-9a24-4b14-ade1-237a16baef10">Re: Bride wants guests to take out the trash at wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm firing all my vendors, returning favors and giving all my guests hefty bags and monogrammed coveralls instead. What a great idea - can't believe I didn't think of it first!
Posted by ceh789[/QUOTE]
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bride-wants-guests-to-take-out-the-trash-at-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e3f7ce6-d36c-4da9-b32a-9f3c2d59fdd7Post:efa1f569-a3bb-40ad-9366-718cc24423d4">Re: Bride wants guests to take out the trash at wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow. I'm pretty sure I would change my RSVP to no after receiving that email. "Sorry, Bride, we are no longer able to make it to your wedding as something has come up. Best of luck finding other trash collectors!"
Posted by AceTT[/QUOTE]
My wedding is at my parents house - I intend on going back there the next morning and cleaning up. If they are throwing my wedding for me then it's the least I can do. I would never dream of assigning "trash duty" to anyone I know because if someone did that to me I'd stop speaking to them.
I hate that whole idea that when you get married, this magical event makes you a responsible adult. I have plenty single friends that are far more responsible than me.
That is hilarious! I hope I am never too responsible to have drunk sex with my hubby!
BFP#1 EDD 9/19/13, M/C at 9wk6dy
[QUOTE]That is hilarious! I hope I am never too responsible to have drunk sex with my hubby!
Posted by Kimbac13[/QUOTE]
Amen!