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A Balanced Amount

HannahandJeremyHannahandJeremy member
10 Comments
in Registry and Gift Forum
My fiancé and I recently went ahead and made our registries.  He lives alone and has many household items, but most of them are second hand items given to him by his parents.  Besides that, he has some basic, cheaper items (kitchen tools, dishes, pots and pans, etc).  I finished grad school last year and I'm a schoolteacher, so I'm living with my parents until the wedding to save up money for our future.  Basically, we don't have many nice household items for our future home (we are looking to buy a house).  

We registered at Target and Bed, Bath & Beyond.  We also have a registry of a few nicer items at Williams-Sonoma.  I'm trying to find a balance between practical and too frivolous.  We are inviting 180 people to our wedding.  In addition, we will most likely have three showers (work, friends, and close friends and family).  We have put the following, more expensive items on our list:
iRobot Roomba vacuum:  $300
KitchenAid Blender:  $99
Formal flatware set:  $130
Calphalon 13 piece stainless steel cookware:  $450
Espresso/coffee maker:  $150
All-Clad Kitchen Tools set:  $130
Knife set:  $200
8 china place settings at $65 each

Besides those things, most of our items are $30 or less, with a few in the $50-$75 range.  Even though we both come from extremely generous families, I am still getting used to the idea of putting such expensive items on the registry.  My fiancé tells me that I shouldn't be stressed out about it, and neither of us believe in putting on video game consoles or other expensive electronics on a registry.  We only have things for our future home on the lists.

We would like to have nice, longer-lasting items for our kitchen and home.  We do need a lot of basics to start out our new life with.  But I'm not so sure about things like the All-Clad kitchen tools and the Calphalon pots and pans.  Is that "too much" in your opinion?  I don't want to ask for only small items, but I also don't want to seem over the top.  

We have many relatives in our extended family that are extremely well off, so it's not an issue of them not being able to afford it.  But I also want them to feel that we love them and want them to share our special day with us, not that we expect very expensive gifts from them. 

Whew, that turned out to be long!  Please share your thoughts!
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Re: A Balanced Amount

  • HannahandJeremyHannahandJeremy member
    10 Comments
    We have about 250 items, but that includes individual kitchen towels, napkins, napkin rings, placemats, smaller kitchen tools, etc.  If I'm only counting items over $5, probably about 180.
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  • HannahandJeremyHannahandJeremy member
    10 Comments
    And yes, my main concern was about the expensive items.  But hey, I am open to any feedback in general.  I'm new to all this.
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  • AmandaLynn920AmandaLynn920 member
    First Comment
    edited March 2012
    I wouldn't be too worried about putting expensive gifts on there, especially if they are things you will actually put to good use.  I think it is a good idea to have a variety of places to shop from to cover every budget.  For the record....the Kitchen Aid mixer I want is closer to $450  Tongue out
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  • HannahandJeremyHannahandJeremy member
    10 Comments
    Thanks so much for your input!  Please keep the feedback coming, I appreciate it!
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  • LeiselEBLeiselEB member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
    I had the same worry, but invites for my first shower have just gone out, so I've been checking my registry like a hawk (hopefully I'm not the only one who does this..) - 2 of the most expensive items were the first to be purchased! 

    You've got enough of a range, and like you said enough people that can afford these things - I wouldn't worry. Plus, some people might decide to buy a group gift for you. I know for my second shower my mom's group of close friends have already decided to buy all of our fine china. Just something to keep in mind. 

    I would just leave your registry as is and enjoy your showers :)
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  • BTCarolusBTCarolus
    100 Comments
    <div>To the OP: your expensive items are items that are normally expensive, and that people expect to see on registries, so nobody will view them as strange or be offended. If somebody is, that is there weird problem, not yours. Also, $99 is cheap for a blender!</div><div>
    </div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_a-balanced-amount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:52ea92a5-86fd-4e53-9896-ed324bf59787Post:c59cbce8-8bfa-4606-a304-fabfd87f5b7a">Re: A Balanced Amount</a>:
    [QUOTE]I had trouble finding things I wanted that were between $20 and $75, but I've convinced myself anyone who doesn't like the gap can just get 2 or 3 $20 items (or a whole bunch of the less than $5 items). If you think of it as 7 or so expensive items out of over a hundred not expensive items, really, it's OK. If it's still rattling you, can you break the sets up into individual, cheaper gifts?
    Posted by ElisabethJoanne[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Has anybody else noticed this? There's basically a huge gap in my items between $35 and about $70. I think there's like two items that are $45 and one that's $50. And it'snot  like I tried to do that. I have just about every normal thing that goes on a registry (minus dinnerware and knives). It almost seems like the stores I was looking at just don't have anything priced between that range. 

    </div>
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  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    OP: you're fine.  Nothing you registered for is absurd at all.  People who don't want to buy the expensive things won't buy them :)
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  • LeiselEBLeiselEB member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_a-balanced-amount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:52ea92a5-86fd-4e53-9896-ed324bf59787Post:5f727e6f-e502-4a7d-b7d5-db67a41adfe3">Re: A Balanced Amount</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: A Balanced Amount : You're not ;-)
    Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

    <div>Glad to know it's not just me :) </div>
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  • ElisabethJoanneElisabethJoanne member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    BT, the registry consultants pointed us to some $30 items, but they weren't actually things we wanted.
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  • Cortney1982Cortney1982 member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    I worked for Macy's for many years and helped people select gifts off of registries.  Having a range of price items is always good because you will have guests with different budgets.  People do prefer when the bride and groom select quality items like you have done.  They don't want their money to go to waste.   I cannot tell you how many times when a guest would not purchase something even when it was in their price range just because they personally didn't like it!  I once had this older woman proceed to select these hideous floral table linens just because SHE liked them and wanted me to add it to the bride and grooms registry!!!!
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  • hoffsehoffse member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its First Answer
    Yeah don't worry about it.  The only thing I would sort of side-eye are the all-clad kitchen tools, but that's because you can get very nice kitchen tools that are as high quality for a fraction of the price.  But only having one or two things like that doesn't bother me as a guest.
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  • chalfacrechalfacre member
    10 Comments
    We registered for a wide variety of things with different price ranges. We've lived together for almost 4 years so we have almost everything we need now anyway. Most of the things we registered for are upgrades to nicer things. If we don't get some of the more expensive things, no big deal. 
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