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January 2013 Weddings
heroeswearbrown
member
Oi vey.
Okay, so this really has nothing to do with our month, but I'mma use you guys as a sounding board. Basically, I know that there is nothing I can do to change this, and that some of my notions are a bit old fashioned about it, but nonetheless. I'm sure my FI is tired of hearing about it, so I'mma put it out here to just get it off my chest and out of my head.
FMIL told me last week that she had bought her dress for the wedding. She didn't consult with me on anything prior to buying the dress and I didn't know she had bought it until two days before it was set to arrive. I thought to myself, okay, maybe she remembered what I had told her before. So I asked her if I could see it. She said no. It cost too much money for me to not like it or for her to think I didn't like it. My first thought was "Okay, so whose wedding is this again?" following shortly by "Am I really that much of a b*tch that she thinks I would tell her I hate it to her face and make her return it?" I mean I know that she and I have different tastes, but I'm not that much of a bridezilla.
Fumed to FI about it for a while and he agreed with me that she should show me. We agreed to talk to her about it. But before we could, she told me I could see it if I promised her I wouldn't hate it, because she can't return it. I, of course, agreed. And sure enough, it was the total and complete opposite of everything I had asked her to keep in mind while shopping and I find the dress to be utterly inappropriate, but I told her she looked lovely, which she did, in all fairness. She looks good in the dress, I just don't like the dress and I don't find it appropriate for a MOG dress.
And to top it all off, she bought the dress before my mother bought hers. I think I'm just going to ask my mother to look for someone along the lines of what I had originally asked them both to keep in mind and let FMIL do her own thing. I didn't make any specific requirements and both mothers had asked me what I thought they should wear. I simply said that I would prefer that the dresses be long, and jewel toned since it was going to be hard to not clash with the bridal party without being in the same color. FMIL's dress is short and pale lavender/brown. I know I can't change it now and I would never dream in a million years of telling her she couldn't wear something that obviously makes her so happy, I just kinda wish she would listen to me for once. but I'm getting used to the whole not listening to me thing.
anyway, that's my rant. Hopefully, I can let it go now. No sense in being mad about what you can't change, right?
FMIL told me last week that she had bought her dress for the wedding. She didn't consult with me on anything prior to buying the dress and I didn't know she had bought it until two days before it was set to arrive. I thought to myself, okay, maybe she remembered what I had told her before. So I asked her if I could see it. She said no. It cost too much money for me to not like it or for her to think I didn't like it. My first thought was "Okay, so whose wedding is this again?" following shortly by "Am I really that much of a b*tch that she thinks I would tell her I hate it to her face and make her return it?" I mean I know that she and I have different tastes, but I'm not that much of a bridezilla.
Fumed to FI about it for a while and he agreed with me that she should show me. We agreed to talk to her about it. But before we could, she told me I could see it if I promised her I wouldn't hate it, because she can't return it. I, of course, agreed. And sure enough, it was the total and complete opposite of everything I had asked her to keep in mind while shopping and I find the dress to be utterly inappropriate, but I told her she looked lovely, which she did, in all fairness. She looks good in the dress, I just don't like the dress and I don't find it appropriate for a MOG dress.
And to top it all off, she bought the dress before my mother bought hers. I think I'm just going to ask my mother to look for someone along the lines of what I had originally asked them both to keep in mind and let FMIL do her own thing. I didn't make any specific requirements and both mothers had asked me what I thought they should wear. I simply said that I would prefer that the dresses be long, and jewel toned since it was going to be hard to not clash with the bridal party without being in the same color. FMIL's dress is short and pale lavender/brown. I know I can't change it now and I would never dream in a million years of telling her she couldn't wear something that obviously makes her so happy, I just kinda wish she would listen to me for once. but I'm getting used to the whole not listening to me thing.
anyway, that's my rant. Hopefully, I can let it go now. No sense in being mad about what you can't change, right?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Oi vey.
RSVP Date: Dec 19
I don't actually care that I don't like the dress. I was more put out that she didn't listen to me. but then again, she never does. I can tell her specifically not to do something and she does it anyway. Like for my birthday, when she asked me what I wanted, I said not kitchen stuff...so what does she get me, a cake stand. It's just typical of her. I'm getting used to it.
IE, she wants to have the rehearsal dinner at her house, which would be doable for 20 people, if a little cramped, but we're going to have closer to 40 people there. So despite how many times we tell her that it will be cramped, she's still insisting on doing things that way and is trying to talk FFIL to doing that instead of something else.
Best of intentions, just doesn't always think things through.