To keep or not to keep?

suzie211 · July 2012

I'm moving in with my BF in a couple weeks and had started digging through my closets for the upcoming move and purge of my stuff. I came across my wedding china buried in my closet. I had always thought I would ebay it or something and here I am years later with it still boxed up.

So ladies would you sell it or keep it?

BF and I will actually have a place that we could entertain at, and I wasn't sure if it would be strange to use these now or if I should stick to the original plan of selling. The pattern is still available in department stores, so selling online would be a realistic option.

Thanks!

CASK85 · July 2012

Sell it. Most certianly sell it. You and BF can go get some new dishware when you move in. Sure it won't be china, but you can get some nice stuff for a good price that won't have the ex-H attached to it.

becunning2 · July 2012

I don't know that I agree with Cschiano. I don't like to advertise my (disasterously awful) marriage, but I certainly have no problem using the pots and pans and knives I got from it. They were hellaciously more nice than what I had. Maybe it's different with china you don't use every day, but a pot, is a pot, is a pot. If it works and you like it, use it. On the other hand, if it makes YOU feel weird and you don't want to use the china, sell it.

dewingedpixie · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_to-keep-or-not-to-keep?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:487edb3a-c2d3-4e17-9c4c-9e6e1b2fd5acPost:c2df5c99-f0e7-4c58-a5ba-5b0bd222da76">Re: To keep or not to keep?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't know that I agree with Cschiano. I don't like to advertise my (disasterously awful) marriage, but I certainly have no problem using the pots and pans and knives I got from it. They were hellaciously more nice than what I had. Maybe it's different with china you don't use every day, but a pot, is a pot, is a pot. If it works and you like it, use it. On the other hand, if it makes YOU feel weird and you don't want to use the china, sell it.
Posted by becunning2[/QUOTE]

I'm with this. I have things from my prior marraige that I will bring into our new home, and so does he. They are things and they are meant to be used. The things that had sentimental attachments are gone as they should be.

cu97tiger · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_to-keep-or-not-to-keep?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:487edb3a-c2d3-4e17-9c4c-9e6e1b2fd5acPost:c2df5c99-f0e7-4c58-a5ba-5b0bd222da76">Re: To keep or not to keep?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't know that I agree with Cschiano. I don't like to advertise my (disasterously awful) marriage, but I certainly have no problem using the pots and pans and knives I got from it. They were hellaciously more nice than what I had. Maybe it's different with china you don't use every day, but a pot, is a pot, is a pot. If it works and you like it, use it. On the other hand, if it makes YOU feel weird and you don't want to use the china, sell it.
Posted by becunning2[/QUOTE]

<div>I think there's a difference between pots and pans/utensils/blenders and china. If you aren't attached to it (or actually, if you ARE still attached to it for some reason), sell it, take the money and buy yourself some nice everyday stuff.</div>

CASK85 · July 2012

I get what cunning and pixe are saying. . . and I agree that a pot or an ironing board or something like that I wouldn't hesitate to continue using. But something about "the nice china" and using it with a new partner doesn't sit right for me. It seems more wedding-y than everyday kitchen tools. I wouldn't judege someone who kept it and used it though. Just do what feels right to you.

suzie211 · July 2012

Thanks for all the input! I agree that most things are just things to be used, but somehow the china always was more weddingish than anything else I had. I've been divorced long enough that practically everything I have now I purchased and I don't think twice about.

I went ahead and contacted one of the ebay resellers here in the city. I know I could do it myself, but after 8 years of not doing so I'm going to have someone else do all the dirty work for me.

It should put a nice chunk of cash towards the new couch we want:)

jorja86 · July 2012

I think it depends on how much you associate the stuff with your prior marriage. The fact that you're feeling a little torn says to me that this stuff probably DOES make your think of the past a little too much for comfort.

I'd sell it and use the money to get some new stuff with your current BF.

lavenderfields13 · July 2012

you were married becunning?! Sorry, I'm nosey!

anssett · July 2012

I'd say it depends on how you feel about the china and how your FI feels. No one should dictate that the china is 'important to the previous marriage' therefore you can't use it. You guys see how you feel.

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