RD drama

skdaum · July 2009

Is it wrong to assume that FI and I will have a little input with the rehearsal dinner that his mother is paying for?

Night_Sprite · July 2009

Please get rid of your gigantic signature.To answer your question, maybe. What do you dislike about her plan?

pumpkinpumpkin · July 2009

your horrible sig pic is WAAAAAYYYY too big. And yes, he who pays, says.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2009

Is Dani's sticky thread still up there?

CubsGirl05 · July 2009

AH...SIGGY POLICE !!SIGGY POLICE!!::p2, where are you?::

BostonBride919 · July 2009

Ideally of course she would want your input, but if she is paying she doesn't have to use it.

CubsGirl05 · July 2009

aw, man, too slow.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2009

Two giant siggies in the same thread

J&K10910 · July 2009

That depends on what you think is "a little input." Can you give us more details? Like what she's planning, and what you want? And can you please shrink your gigantic signature?

pumpkinpumpkin · July 2009

Boston's could probably use some reduction as well.

lyndausvi · July 2009

depends on what your input is.

alixzafiris · July 2009

I'm sorry. I'd love to answer but I'm being thoroughly distracted by your hideously large signature.

banana468 · July 2009

1) PLEASE reduce your siggy 2) Ideally you'll have input into a party that's in your honor but it doesn't always work that way unfortunately.

lauralaur · July 2009

That depends on his mother. Is she planning something drastically different from what you guys would want?

swans alive · July 2009

Need more information before I can answer that for you. Input as to what? Generally, it's nice for the person who pays to consult with you and FI -- they don't have to listen to your opinion, though.

wadingmoose · July 2009

It depends. You really need to tell us more.

crazycatladyk · July 2009

It's the Golden Rule. Whoever has the Gold makes the Rules.

StacylovesAdam · July 2009

I would have said something completely different a couple months ago because my MIL planned our rehearsel dinner. We had no input but I saw how excited she was to do something nice for us and how special she wanted it to be so how could we be upset with her?? Plus in all honesty it took away 1 more thing for my sweets and I to worry about. Getting down to the last 2 months you will be preoccupied just let her do it, show up, and have fun! :-)Good Luck!

skdaum · July 2009

Sorry about the signature...anyways. She is more interested in doing what she wants instead of hosting something that would be convenient for guests (guests, not FI and I - we don't care). Also, she will guilt trip us over spending money even though she volunteered. We are wondering if we can try to steer her in the direction we're thinking or just let her do what she wants. We would gladly stretch our budget to cover it, but then she will guilt trip us more for not letting her plan and host. So I guess my question is more WWYD and less etiquette at this point. Sorry! Their relationship is just complicated.

summerfaun66 · July 2009

People need to chill about the siggies. I think your should be able to voice your opinion about the RD, but since your mother is the one paying for it, it's kinda like 'her money, her stuff'.

skdaum · July 2009

Shoot. I tried to just delete that huge thing. Sorry.

wadingmoose · July 2009

PS, it's not that hard to delete your sig. Just highlight the HTML and hit delete.

Soon-to-be Mrs. Vogt · July 2009

Not being one to turn down free money and less work, I'd let my ILs do pretty much whatever they wanted.My FILs are paying for our RD, but they don't really want to plan it. I'm exceptionally happy with that situation, but I certainly wouldn't complain about doing less work either. Who really cares what she wants? It's just your RD. As long as she's not setting up a torture chamber for you guests, I wouldn't worry about it (and honestly, some people might be in to that sort of thing.)

Calypso1977 · July 2009

we paid for our own RD as well, although H's parents offered to. i did ask MIL for her input on the menu choces as i wanted to make sure there'd be something she and her husband would eat, but other than that, i didnt ask for input. had we let them host, i would have wanted her to solicit the same input from us, but other than that, i woudlnt have hcared.

banana468 · July 2009

Yeah, "people" need to realize that a huge siggy is a pain to load and for reading the posts. If I'm on the netbook and not my iMac, I'd be ticked at having to scroll through all that. OP, can you be more specific? Is she wanting the RD at a place 40 minutes from the guests? It's hard to offer feedback when it's pretty vague.

skdaum · July 2009

It's just too complicated to get into. Thanks for the feedback. For some reason the page won't load correctly for me to delete the signature - apologies.

banana468 · July 2009

Huh? Click on the smiley face and delete the sig option at the bottom. It's not 'that' complicated to do. As for the rest of the details, why on earth are you looking for feedback on a situation if you won't actually describe the situation?

Soon-to-be Mrs. Vogt · July 2009

So, you don't have time to give us the complete picture, but we're supposed to take time to actually answer your question and provide advice?How lucky for us.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2009

moving along...

angelandlibby · July 2009

Not knowing the entire story my advice is to show up, let her host, and be gracious.

september's bride · July 2009

Your wedding is an important day for his mom as well, so it would be nice of you to allow her to do something for you guys in her style. Seriously, let her plan the RD - it's one less thing to worry about, and ultimately, it's just one meal. It won't make or break your wedding.

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