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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Does Bachelorette Party = Personal Shower?

I've only been involved with one bachelorette party in my time and I'm not sure of the proper etiquette. The only BP I've attended was held right after the bridal shower, and apparently it included a personal shower. Is there an unwritten rule that a Bachelorette Party include a Personal Shower? If so, do the same etiquette rules apply? (such as not inviting the same people to multiple showers) I have been invited to a bachelorette party and there was a line in the invite about opening gifts. I don't want to feel foolish not showing up with a gift, but I already attended the bridal shower with a gift and I'm planning on attending the wedding with a monetary gift as well. Any advice and your opinions would be greatly appreciated
When you're born in Chicago you're blessed and you're healed the first time you walk into Wrigley Field. My Bio

Re: Does Bachelorette Party = Personal Shower?

  • Ask the person who sent the invite  
  • some of the bachelorette parties I've been to have had naughty gift openings... where the bride-to-be was given lingerie and sex toys and the such. So, I would check with the party host.
  • Generally I would say no.  Bachelorette parties aren't really gift giving events.  That said, I did get a few very small ($20 or less) gifts at my bachelorette party.  When you call or e-mail to rsvp, just ask if you should bring a small gift.
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  • The only gifts I've seen at bachelorette parties were lingerie and candy penises and other stuff. It was completely optional and given just for funsies. I don't view bachelorette parties as a gift-giving event, but maybe ask the hostess what she had in mind? You could always bring something small.
  • I don't understand what a "personal shower" is. I suspect it doesn't mean what i think it means.
  • I believe a "Personal Shower" to mean a shower where the bride receives gifts of a personal nature....It's a polite way to say naughty items and lingerie.
    When you're born in Chicago you're blessed and you're healed the first time you walk into Wrigley Field. My Bio
  • Aha, thanks. In that case, just ask the host/person who sent the invite.
  • I've never been to a bachelorette party that included a gift, and it would annoy me more than a little with all the other expenses involved.  If you check and find out it is a gift giving occasion, I think you'd be perfectly fine to pick up a very cheap, gag-type gift (like handcuffs from the kids' toy section, a box of anatomical macaroni, or similar).
  • I think that because you have already attended a shower for this same bride that you've done your gift giving responsibilities. If anything I would just take a card, or you get a gag type gift like PP said. Or maybe a small bottle of the brides favorite liquor (if she drinks) since its more of a BP.
  • The rule that applies is no one gets invited to the bach party who isn't invited to the wedding.I'd ask the hostess about the deal with gifts though.  Most bach parties I've attended don't have them.
  • In my circle lingerie gifts at the bachelorette party are pretty much a given.
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