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Handing out programs? little long

BrideMaidProBrideMaidPro
100 Comments
in New Jersey
Would you be insulted if you were not part of the bridal party of a close friend but instead were asked to hand out programs?I have 2 pretty close friends that I could not include in my bridal party because of the amount of family that i had to include but as the wedding gets closer I feel a little guilty about not including them in anything. It is a Catholic Ceremony, no mass though... (we have 2 relatives doing readings)...but would it be better to just not include them in anything or ask them to hand out programs?I don't want them to feel like an afterthought...but I don't want to hurt their feelings not including them (and I would really like them to somehow be included)fyi--I am def NOT into the "personal assistant" type of deal that some brides ask girls to do instead of being a BMthoughts? suggestions?
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Re: Handing out programs? little long

  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I'd personally rather sit and relax, than hand out programs. I think taking a few minutes during the day to say "Thanks for coming, it means a lot to me that you're here" is plenty (and maybe have a pro photo taken with them and give them each a framed copy later). Do you need people to read the Prayer of the Faithful or the Responsorial Psalm? Maybe they could do that.If you're doing to get your hair/makeup done with your BMs prior to the ceremony, maybe invite them to come hang out with you get ready. Maybe treat them if you can afford it. If not, maybe get champagne or something for everyone and just hang out and chat.
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  • I <3 SeabassI <3 Seabass
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think it depends on the person. I know some people that love to be included just to be included and don't care what role they play. They just want to feel more important than a "normal" guests. But then there are other people that wouldn't want a BS job like that. So I think it really depends on your friends and how well you know them and their personalities.
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  • jaimelodyjaimelody
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I would say yes if asked but wouldn't really want to like the pp said. Only bc you want to enjoy te ceremony. Don't feel too bad. If they are that close to you they know your situation concerning family in the bridal party
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  • PhyllisbridePhyllisbride
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    not at all, I couldnt have all of my fiances neices and nephews in the wedding, and I really wanted one of them to be a part of it, so she gave out the programs
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  • BrideMaidProBrideMaidPro
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yea..I was thinking that it was too much of a BS job.is 25 too old to be a flower girl?  hahaI just feel bad because since the engagement, these 2 have been more involved and interested in the wedding moreso than a few of the actual bridesmaids (both the family ones and friend ones)I worry about pleasing everyone too much.  I will think of something...
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  • ddelo23ddelo23
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    i had a couple friends like this, and I just invited them to get ready with me the day of.  I figured it was a nice way to include them, and I truly did want them there.
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  • Partymixx27Partymixx27 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I wouldn't be insulted, but I would say yes just to make the bride happy and would rather just relax than hand out programs.  It depends on thier personalities, really.  And at 25 I think it's a bit old to be a program-hander-outer.  If I were you I'd skip having them hand out programs and invite them to hang out in the bridal suite with the rest of the BP, or something like that.
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  • alliecarrie41alliecarrie41 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    yes, handing out programs is a job.  no one wants a job at your wedding.  just have them as guests.  i'd totally be turned off if someone asked me to just hand out programs. 
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  • kewltifkewltif member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I'd say yes because how the hell could you say no, but I would much rather relax with the other guests than worry about handing out programs. 
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