My maids will not help...

[Deleted User] · July 2009

On May 2010. Why aren't they doing everything for me, yadda, yadda.

thesuninherhead · July 2009

What would the maids even have to help with that far out?

[Deleted User] · July 2009

I know TheSun! I don't get it either. But another girl said she knew what she meant. As always I am the biitch of May 2010.

Sooles · July 2009

well when you agree to be a bridesmaid, you are agreeing to help book the venue, pick a wedding gown, arrange the catering and design the flowers. if the bridesmaids dont want to do that then they shouldnt agree to the job.

aMrsin09 · July 2009

CS, maybe it's a change in the times, becaue I've never been in a wedding where we DIDN't help. This whole, BMs are a prop for pictures is new to me after I came to the knot. We've always helped set up showers, given opinions on flowers, colors etc., offered to help address invites, made tissue paper flowers to decorate the cars (now I'm really showing my age).

aMrsin09 · July 2009

I can see that. The vendor/wedding coordinator doing the work is recent too. Back in the 70s/early 80s the BP set up the decorations and tables blah blah...and then took it all down again.

trix1223 · July 2009

aMrs._speaking of a change in times: I was MOB 2 weeks ago, so I'm coming to this phenomenon as someone who's been married for 31 years.Back then, at least in our circle, didn't participate at all in pre-wedding planning or parties. We planned our own weddings. My DH and I, or my parents and I, went to appointments: caterers, florists, dress shopping, invitations. No one even considered that BMs should do these things. Families hosted showers: generally brides had a (small) shower with her side, and groom's family also hosted a separate (small) shower with his side of the family.I don't think my BMs even came to any showers. And I know I didn't go to any at which I was a BM.Perhaps that's why I find the demanding "entitlement" of some brides disconcerting. It's a completely different attitude than what the norm for us.

Brie2010 · July 2009

Did she DD? I don't see it.There was also a DD yesterday where someone asked about a honeymoon registry. (Unless I just can't find it anymore.)

jeannigirl · July 2009

Ok I remember back in the days of being MOH in two of my best friends wedding and also being a BM in a couple others and I was not asked to help pick the place where B&G was to hold their W&R or to pick out their food flowers or anything B&G and family took care of that stuff I was there to support her and stand by her side. I am a firm believer in that their are No duties that a WP has to perform for the Bride. They are there to support and stand by the Bride. The ones responsibility for all the planning and securing Venues and Vendors is the B&G, its their wedding. Also I think if that you want some help then you can ask your WP its up to them to decide if they can or want to assist you. If they offer their assistance in whatever you need then let them help where they can. I don't expect my MOG or BM to do anything for me. My MOH (daughter) has said that their are things that she wants to be involved with so I asked her what she wanted to be involved with, and she told me what those were. My BM the very same thing.

Sooles · July 2009

it just occured to me that i sound 'serious' when i replied yesterday.ha.

thesuninherhead · July 2009

you sounded serious only to those who completely lack the ability to register sarcasm or tounge-in-cheek ... ;P

My maids will not help...

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