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Dear Mother,

BecW2beBecW2be
5000 Comments Combo Breaker
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Thank you for verbally inviting one cousin and her extended family that I haven't seen since Christmas on Saturday, and another entire group of 2nd and 3rd cousins I haven't seen in YEARS on Sunday to my wedding. That wasn't awkward at all. Really. I have plenty of room for the 15 or so people you spoke with this weekend.I'm also not sure that sending them invites "knowing" they won't come will work at all, either. And, NO, I will not give you a stack of invitations to hand deliver to those we don't want to attend so you can say, "This is really an announcement, not an invitation." Can you possibly drop some asprin by my house tonight? I seem to have taken a horrible headache from banging my head on my desk for the last 20 minutes after our phone conversation. Thank You, Your Daughter
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Re: Dear Mother,

  • wadingmoosewadingmoose member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 25 Love Its
    Ouch.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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  • Night_SpriteNight_Sprite
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    You should punch her in the uterus so she'll feel your pain a little. 
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  • J&K10910J&K10910 member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Oh Bec!  I'm trying not to laugh.  I told FI the other day that when it came time to make a final guestlist, he would need to have a talk with his dad about not inviting the random people he talks to at work/the bar/the coffee shop/etc.  FI's eyes got wide and he got a look of sheer terror on his face, I'm assuming from imagining the damage his dad will likely do anyway. 

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  • georgia_bride09georgia_bride09 member
    5000 Comments
    Oh, Bec, that sucks. What are you going to do? Not send them anything and hope they don't show? You need to tell your momma to shut her dern trap!!
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  • BecW2beBecW2be
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I'm laughing too, J&K. It's really all I can do. I actually had to remind her of my wedding 16 yrs ago, when she did EXACTLY the same thing, and my wedding of <100 turned into 326! My father was in his tux buying more food to serve. NIGHTMARE. She finally said, "Oh, here's what we'll do. I can fix this! We'll tell everyone that J doesn't want anyone from the station finding out about the ceremony because he wants to keep it private and simple without a lot of guests, so we're keeping it immediate family only." That was our plan from the moment we were engaged, which has been repeated to her endlessly. LMAO!
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  • mocha beansmocha beans member
    2500 Comments
    lol  Bummer!
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  • whis1970whis1970 member
    Tenth Anniversary 10 Comments
    Lol. I feel your pain. Spoke to my mom this morning, and she was like "oh, and this person wants an invitaion, and oh yeah, you need to invite so and so, and then so and so will be upset if they don't get an invite..." GrrrrrrrIsn't it GREAT!!! Lol
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  • J&K10910J&K10910 member
    10000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    and my wedding of <100 turned into 326I'm not laughing anymore.  HOLY. CRAP.  Is it too late for a secret venue change?

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    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
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  • BecW2beBecW2be
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    My first wedding was in our huge southern baptist church, so there was room for her guests. This wedding is in such a small place (FI's yard!) that it's impossible to fit more than 120. I just told her that I'll send invites out August 1, and she'll get her's October 30 so she can't share the address with anyone. LOL We ended up laughing about it, but really! It has to stop! She's making me nuts!
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  • kdcweddingkdcwedding
    500 Comments
    I feel your pain - FI mom keeps asking us to invite people that she says "I know they won't come anyway, but we were invited to their son/daughters wedding, etc etc"One - why send an invite if they're not going to come - seems pointless and gift grabby and what if they DO comeTwo - You have met their son/daughter, they don't know me OR your son at all!So, yeah...that stinks.
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  • goheels05goheels05
    2500 Comments
    Oh mom. 
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  • BecW2beBecW2be
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Bless her heart. You know how weddings roll here in the south, so I understand why she's behaving this way, but we've told her and told her this is a small, family wedding! Jeeeeesus! You'll see the crazy in action yourself on 10.31, Heels. Just don't judge me by my 'rents, ok? Please?
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  • jeannigirljeannigirl member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    Personally I would not ask my daughter to invite my friends to her wedding unless my daugher had a bond or connection with them.I would just sit down with mom and lay it out like this. We are having only this set amount of guests. It will be a small intimate wedding with inmmediate family meaning Aunts & Uncles of Mom and dad and first cousins, and our close friends. There will not be any guests that I haven't spoken with in more than a year. Then be done with it no more talk of including anyone on the guest list. It is already finalized. Good luck. Stand strong!
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