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Florida-Central Florida

RSVP consistency

Even though I listed every person in his family by name on the save the date, my uncle told me that they are bringing his daughter's boyfriend to the wedding.  His daughter (my cousin) is 21 and lives at home. She doesn't work and hasn't had more than an eight hour a week job and hasn't gone to college.  She just lives at home. She's been dating this guy for a year and they say they are going to get married all the time. 

I really want to keep invites under control but I've decided this one just isn't worth fighting over.  I see this family all the time and if they do end up getting married, I'll feel bad if he wasn't invited to the wedding. In addtion, they're coming to FL as their family vacation for a few weeks and if I tell them he's not invited then they can' t really bring him on their vacation. It's a lot harder when they're taking a vacation not just a wedding trip.  What would he do the whole day of the wedding? 

I'm worried about being consistent though. I don't want every other college student who has a boyfriend and lives at home to bring their boyfriend and I don't want teenagers bringing dates either.  How can I handle this?  I was thinking about not putting his name on the invites and then when they bring him if someone says something just saying oh it was a surprise.  But then my uncle might be upset when I don't include him on the invite.  I'm specifically putting on the RSVP card how many seats are reserved for each guest. What would you do?  Would you include boyfriend on the invite or leave him off still and not say anything if he shows up?

Re: RSVP consistency

  • edited December 2011
    Thats a tough one.  There are specific people I want to make sure don't bring their bf or gf and I'm putting specifc numbers of seats have been reserved on the RSVP card.  You could invite him and if anyone asks say that you were under the impression they were engaged and since its rude to invite someone without their significant other if they are married or engaged you had to invite him.  But, I wouldn't worry about what people will say because they won't say it directly to you so you can just pretend like its not happening!  I am not inviting children at all- like the youngest will be 21, but my FI's cousin is bringing his middle school aged kids bc they are making it a family vacation.  I'm just going to pretend my side of the family isn't complaining that FI's side has kids invited!
  • Theresa626Theresa626 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    that's a good idea about saying they're engaged.  Living in Orlando makes it difficult because everyone makes the wedding into a Disney vacation and then it's really hard to say no to extra guests. 
  • andee1353andee1353 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Way to go MLHarbis!
  • edited December 2011
    I am having the same problem, our long time family friends are making a vacation of it, and originally just the M&D were to be invited (Moms close with them) but now we need to add their oldest daughter and her son! I'd say bite the bullet on that one, but explain to people in the future that you understand they are making a vacation of it, but that the seating capacity is xx (it never hurts to fib if you ask me!) Good luck
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    225 image Invited
    127 image Making the Trip
    98 image Missing out
    0 image MIA
    RSVP date February 19th
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