Chinese Weddings

Sigh. Will this matter?

Is there any custom that the parents and "important people" have to be at table 1, 2, 3 etc.? We're thinking that our parents should sit closest to us, then relatives, then friends, but due to the layout of the room, this won't actually mean that the "best" tables are numbered in order.Sigh. I'm afraid to ask my dad because I'm sure he'll say "Of course we should be at table 1/2". I'm just concerned about how user-friendly the seating chart is.
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Re: Sigh. Will this matter?

  • edited December 2011
    I don't know about any custom.  We had a sweetheart table directly cross from the band and dancefloor.  Our parents table (and their family VIPs) bookended us.  We placed our friends closet to the speakers for practical purposes. But maybe you should ask your dad what he prefers.  HTH!
  • edited December 2011
    I'm not sure if you'd consider this a stretch, but could you maybe, instead of having table numbers, have something else to "number" your tables? I've seen some weddings using different Chinese phrases or words, or even pictures to assign tables their "number". Sometimes it appears cheesy, but I think maybe it could be done in nice way? Maybe this would be a little loophole to the table number custom, if you find out there is one? Or similar to what pp said, ask your dad, and then say, "well, if that's the case then you won't get the best tables... do you mind?" If for some reason they found out about a custom like that, my parents would probably say, "oh... well just number them how YOU want to and make those tables 1, 2, and 3... lol :) *sigh* As if wedding planning wasn't frustrating enough as it is, right?
  • edited December 2011
    Ohhh, I completed missed the point...haha Now that we're on the same page (hopefully), I don't think your parents will even notice what table number they are assigned to.  They're gonna have so much on their minds that night, that small details will go to the wayside.
  • edited December 2011
    For as long as I've known, table numbers are really important. Family members always get the first few numbers.  If you're not using numbers, then they need to be close to the front as possible. I was lucky that the restaurant I used had 3 head tables sitting on top of a small stage.  Table 1 was in the middle where I sat with my hubby's family.  Table 2 had my family. Table 3 were other close family members (esp those who came from far away).  All the rest of the low numbers were all my other family members and all of my parents friends.  All of our friends sat at the high numbers, but it didn't really matter because the set up of the restaurant allowed those table numbers to sit near the dance floor.  Some of those tables were actually closer to the dance floor than some of the low numbered tables, but my parents were satisfied with it.  You should speak to your parents to find out if that really matters.  I ended up asking my parents where they wanted their friends to sit.  
  • edited December 2011
    My FIL was concerned about this - I had the parents seated at table 16. Then I showed him the map of the tables and Table 16 was in front, by the head table in front of the dance floor (where he wanted to be) and then he understood that I had to do the tables in order so they were easy to find. Maybe you can do that - just show them the LOCATION of the tables versus the physical number.
  • ring_popring_pop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks guys. buttaflai - I think I'll do exactly that. I don't really want to use table "numbers" or "pictures" - the whole point of this numbering scheme is to make things easier.Talked to my mom last night and said it should be fine to use whatever numbering scheme we want. I also made the argument about the impracticality, and also that I don't want to have to choose between my parents and FILs to sit at "table 1", presumably the most important table. Besides, I hate the idea that your guests are seated in order of their "importance". What does that mean for the lower numbers? Is family x at table 6 more important than family y at table 7? Are your friends at table 20 more important than those at 21? Ick.
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  • edited December 2011
    I'd be afraid that nobody would want to be sat at table 4 aka "table o' death."I am considering labeling tables by words that are written in Chinese and English.My theme: Virtues of a Good Marriage (love, Friendship, trust, wisdom, etc.) and then each table's virtue match who actually will sit there. The head table will just read Love, his elders will sit at the wisdom table, our mutual friends will be at the friendship table. And so on. I think it will make it fun to find out your table instead of thinking "why am I at table 13?"
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  • edited December 2011
    Hi, i'm not going to have numbers. I'm going to use our favorite things as our table "numbers". this is similar to Alko's idea. We have a cat named Butters so there will be a table named Butters, FI loves the Flyers so there will be a flyers table, etc. That way, it doesnt really matter what "number" you're at!
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