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What would you do?

JaimeMarieBJaimeMarieB member
Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
in Maine
So DH is the best man at a wedding this fall. They are serving shellfish kabobs (sp) and other kabobs. I'm allergic to shellfish can't even be around it cooking. I told DH I can't go. He just sighed. I feel bad since it's his best friend. But I really don't want to deal with shellfish issues either. Maybe I can just go to the ceremony.
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Re: What would you do?

  • danieleandwaynedanieleandwayne member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I totally hear you, JaimeMarie-- that is a rough position you're in. I'm allergic to onions and have to carry an epi pen for it. Here's what I've done (and granted, they weren't cooking onions in front of me) at past weddings-- I called the bride (whom I knew; maybe your DH can call the groom) and explained the situation. I was able to get a special meal and sit in a seat further away from the kitchen, as well as at a table that had fewer guests. Perhaps something similar can be arranged-- or something can be arranged depending on how severe your reaction is? Otherwise, I'd go to the ceremony and the cocktail hour (if there is one) and then politely excuse myself for the reception.Your DH should understand this-- and besides, he's going to have a lot of responsibilities that night, so how much dancing with you will he really get to do? Good luck!
    "Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky." -- Ranier Maria Rilke BabyFruit Ticker image Me:37 MH:38 TTC since Oct 2011 BFP/Beta#1: 13 6/20/12; Beta#2: 20 6/22/12; MC/Beta#3: 9 6/27/12 BFP#2/Beta#1: 9/21/12 S/PAIFW
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  • mainezillamainezilla
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I have no idea if this is feasible for you, but could you do the ceremony, cocktail hour, and then come back for the dancing/fun part of the reception after the dinner hour? B/c really after the intros, speech and dinner the best man duties are really over, that way you guys can have a good time and you aren't worried about ending up in the hospital. My dad is very allergic to scallops, and triple checked everything to ensure our venue did not have any scallops near any of our food, I spoke to the chef, it was all over our paperwork b/c I was scared he would encounter one, and then be so sick. GL
    image The way life should be-
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  • RunnersmfRunnersmf
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    That is a tough situation. If you can't even be around shellfish then DH should understand. However, maybe you can work something out so that you are no where near the fish. It's a common allergy so the bride and grrom should have a plan in place for this situation. Good Luck!!
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  • JaimeMarieBJaimeMarieB member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    it's at their house and it's a bbq outside. I'm afraid of people touching things then me touching things. I emailed the bride and told her that I will be coming to the ceremony but will be leaving before the reception.
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  • danieleandwaynedanieleandwayne member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    This might seem like a stupid question, but....Why would you do a seafood reception? I know that people do lobster bakes and stuff because it is quintessential "Maine" but with all the people who are so severely allergic to shellfish, why would that be a good choice for a large reception?!?Maybe it's just me, but...
    "Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky." -- Ranier Maria Rilke BabyFruit Ticker image Me:37 MH:38 TTC since Oct 2011 BFP/Beta#1: 13 6/20/12; Beta#2: 20 6/22/12; MC/Beta#3: 9 6/27/12 BFP#2/Beta#1: 9/21/12 S/PAIFW
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  • JaimeMarieBJaimeMarieB member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I don't know lol. It's a backyard thing and they are doing kabobs (Sp) on the grill.
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  • jgreg29jgreg29
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think you made the right call. Shellfish allergies are so serious--you don't want to risk it! Sorry you won't be able to go to the reception though.
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