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WWYD-riding Dani's coat tails

punkyb2bpunkyb2b
100 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Dani's post made me want to post this here and see what you all thought.I have a friend.  I/we have given him and his wife generous gifts for multiple life events-engagement, ATR(they eloped), housewarming, baby birth.   We have never received a thank you for any of those gifts. They came to our wedding.   They did not give us a gift or card.*  My DH hates them and half jokingly wants to call them out on their rudeness.  Would you?*I didnt get married for the gifts, but not giving a gift is not an acceptable practice in our circle of friends.  Its the principle not the lack of a gift/card.
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Re: WWYD-riding Dani's coat tails

  • Night_SpriteNight_Sprite
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    You know the answer to this.  Of course you don't get mad at people for not getting you a present.
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  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Call them out on the rudeness of no thank you cards ever, maybe if you're gutsy enough to do it.  Call them out on not getting you a wedding gift?  No way.
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  • zippitybzippityb member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    No, I would just bask in my politeitude.
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  • wadingmoosewadingmoose member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 25 Love Its
    No.  I probably wouldn't call them out.  Certainly not on the wedding gift.  But even calling them out on the thank you cards is rude.  Yup.  It's rude to call someone out on poor etiquette.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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  • punkyb2bpunkyb2b
    100 Comments
    I actually asked if they received a gift I sent and they had and still didnt even get a verbal thank you, just a oh yeah we did. I would never call them out on either of the situations I wrote.  I'm too polite :) Just curious if anyone has. I basically just stopped talking to them and avoid them ( there are other issues not just the above). 
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  • ffmaidffmaid
    1000 Comments
    1. Technically you have a year to get a couple a wedding gift that seems out dated these days but technically still holds. 2. Also gifts are never to be expected and well i think you knew that these folks are not teh gift giving thank you note writing type and you should get that and not give expecting in return as you will not get in return  
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  • C WC W
    500 Comments
    Yeah, I definitely wouldn't call them out. Isn't that just as bad as them not giving you a gift? I would be a hurt that they didn't thank me for the gifts, though. And I probably wouldn't give them gifts in the future.
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  • SwedishChick2011SwedishChick2011
    2500 Comments
    Well, it sounds like you know not to call them out.  But yeah, they sound pretty rude.  Not even a verbal thank you when you asked if they got your gift?  That's cold.
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  • TheSaltyPeanutTheSaltyPeanut member
    1000 Comments
    Not going to lie, I would be peeved too. I would NOT, however, "call them out." Maybe at their other events, just get them a nice card? [i]Its the principle not the lack of a gift/card.[/i] Ok... so if they just got you a nice card, that would be horrid?
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  • punkyb2bpunkyb2b
    100 Comments
    ffmaid- your number 2 made me laugh.  It took me a few reads to figure out where the commas should go to make the sentence readable ;)I'm glad you all agree with me. I can tell DH to drop it already because the knot posters say I'm right! :)
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  • punkyb2bpunkyb2b
    100 Comments
    Salty Peanut- Nope.  A heartfelt card means more to me than a gift.  I didnt even want to register.  We did to appease MIL.  So her friends could buy us gifts if they wanted.  One of her friends never did and she STILL goes off about it and asks every time we see her. I have told her many many many times how little it matters to me.  But she is embarrassed and hurt by her friends actions. 
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  • georgia_bride09georgia_bride09 member
    5000 Comments
    I would have stopped giving these people gifts a long time ago.
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  • Soon-to-be Mrs. VogtSoon-to-be Mrs. Vogt
    2500 Comments
    Yeah, I definitely wouldn't call them out. Isn't that just as bad as them not giving you a gift? I agree with CM. Except I believe if you call them out, it would be worse than them not getting you a gift. You know better. Don't stoop to their level of ignorance.
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I wouldn't call them out on it but I also wouldn't participate in any gift-giving practices with them.  Yes they're rude but it's still not appropriate to call them out on it.  Some people are just takers. 
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