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Michigan-Detroit

Oh boy - my first "kid-related" issue (kinda long)

This weekend at FSIL birthday party, FI’s niece (wife of one of the nephews standing up for us) approached me about wedding stuff.  She was telling me how her parents and her in laws are the only ones she trusts to watch her girls (1 and 4).  She has a 21 year old sister who can watch them but she is afraid to leave them w/ her at night because she’s not used to keeping them for extended periods of time, and the little one won’t sleep in any bed besides her own. Obviously her in laws can’t keep them since it’s FI’s sister, so that leaves her parents.  She told me a little about a situation with her parents, but couldn’t go into detail because she was drunk and didn’t want to start crying – but anyhow she is worried they may not be able to watch the girls and asked if it came down to it would she be able to bring them for a couple hours.  I told her we’d cross the bridge when it gets here but that my parents (who are paying) are adamant about no little kids and a lot of family members would be pizzed if they saw someone with little kids at the reception when they had to leave theirs at home (especially the ones OOS).  We couldn’t really talk because drunken family members kept interrupting us.  I told her to call me any time and we can talk more. She said she’s going to start bringing them around her sister more often to get her accustomed to watching them more so it shouldn’t be a problem in 7 months but I really need to stand my ground on this and not let it bug me.  FI already told his sister and his nephew that the babies were not invited and he was very adamant about it to her as well.
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Re: Oh boy - my first "kid-related" issue (kinda long)

  • edited December 2011
    A) I really think your family should drink less. B) The niece can totally tough it out and hire a damn sitter. For realz. Every other parent on earth (roughly) hires sitters, so can she. She needs to take a xanax and chill out.
    Steph and Chris, 6/26/10
    Planned Executed
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  • Jacks21583Jacks21583 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Agree with hippie. Even if she's a stay at home mom, there is going to come a time when she has to hire a sitter. She's got 7 months to build rapport with someone locally (although I don't think it should take that long, lol). Weddings aren't really the best environment for children, especially if you have a lot of heavy drinkers.
  • tnspighttnspight member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    My gf is having this same problem right now.  She is going back to work (teacher) after taking the year off w/their first child.  They just started letting family babysit a few months ago.  She started day care last week and it's very hard on her.  She cries most of the time.  Stick to your guns.  In seven months, they should be comfortable around other people.
  • edited December 2011
    It’s still 7 months off but I think if she asks again I may suggest to her that she & DH get a room at the local hotel blocked for the wedding and have her sister and maybe sister’s BF come down and keep the girls at the hotel.  They can take them to the hotel pool, a nearby ice cream place and a nearby park and keep them occupied that way (and maybe the baby will sleep), and niece/nephew will be close enough if they have to get to them for any reason.
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  • leeshab1982leeshab1982 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Seven months is PLENTY of time for her to figure something out.  Stick to your guns on this one!!
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