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Wedding photos & family members.

hyeaghchigemhyeaghchigem member
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
How do you deal with a family who wants to ask the photographer to take family pictures of them at our wedding?

My fiance's uncle's wife wants our photographer to take pictures of their family during our wedding.  She is wiling tol pay for the photos. But, I don't see how that would work.  The photographer will be putting all the pictures on a cd for us to print out.  And we will be chosing a few to go in our digital albumn. 

 We've given our photogprapher a list of family members that we would like pictures with and of.  But, we are limited in the number of shots that we have. Additionally, I don't see how the photographer will set aside time to take family portraits of them whilst forgoing taking pictures of the happy couple.  Am I being unreasonable here or is she just rude to even ask? 
 
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Re: Wedding photos & family members.

  • kate51485kate51485 member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments
    If they want family pictures, and will pay for them, then they need to schedule a separate session.  I think that's pretty rude. 
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  • opalsky007opalsky007 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    It was rude of her to ask. I would just let her know that your photographer is likely to be very busy, but that if you wind up with any good photos of the family, she's welcome to have them printed.
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  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments

    You are limited in the numbers of shots that they will take, or the number that you can order?  Because having a limit to the number that they take is really crappy.

    That being said, if your photographer is a professional, they should be able to deflect any requests for photography.

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  • FutureMrsDudley55FutureMrsDudley55 member
    1000 Comments
    edited March 2010
    What an odd request. I would be not be happy if one of my family members asked to have their family portraits taken by our wedding photographer on our wedding day. They should arrange their own photographer. You shouldn't have to mess with something like this at all.
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  • beatlesgirl25beatlesgirl25
    5000 Comments
    edited March 2010
    No. This is rude. She needs to schedule their own photo session on a different day. They can get dressed up one more time for it. Your photographer should be focused on you and your FI and your agreed upon pictures, and will be plenty busy doing that.

    It's like if someone asked to have a completely different entree at your reception, and offered to pay for it. No, they can eat their favorite meal some other night. Your wedding is not the time for this.



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  • FutureMrsTRFutureMrsTR
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary
    It's rude of her to ask.  I think what Opal said is good.  Let them know the photographer will be busy, but they're welcome to order any photos that they may happen to be in.  Hopefully your photographer is professional enough to deflect those requests the day of.  Because if she's rude enough to ask now, she's rude enough to bring her kids in matching outfits and still expect it to happen.
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  • shaydeniseshaydenise
    1000 Comments
    Wow...  IMO that was rude of her to ask.  It's your WEDDING photographer.  He/she is not there to take family portraits due to the fact that people are too lazy to schedule an appointment to have it done on their own time.
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  • MCarmineMCarmine member
    500 Comments

    I've had the same request....and I thought it was pretty rude of them to ask. I said that I'm not sure how much time there will be to schedule a family portrait in the middle of a wedding. The day is hectic enough as it is. I gave her my photogs info so she could call herself and make an appointment. 

    The kicker is that we're not having kids at the wedding and everyone knows this. The woman suggested that her kids just show up in their Sunday best, take a few family portraits and then leave. I hate people.

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  • goheels05goheels05
    2500 Comments
    Oh dear Lord. 
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  • dianenjnjdianenjnj member
    Knottie Warrior 100 Comments
    she's definitely overstepping here...tell your photographer. in no uncertain terms,  to only take the pictures YOU have authorized and to be prepared for her to ask...then he can be ready with an answer..."sorry, you'll have to book a seating!"
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  • vgmartinezvgmartinez
    500 Comments
    Thats rude. I've been warned that some family we're inviting may hit the photographer up for pictures of their own families. I'm gonna talk to our photographer about this and tell him he can say "per the bride and groom...NO." I won't feel bad about that.
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  • hyeaghchigemhyeaghchigem member
    First Comment
    Thank you ladies! Your comments are very helpful. We are limited in the number of shot we can order to be be printed. But, we are getting a cd of all the pictures unblocked so we are free to email, post or print them however we please. I will definitely be giving my photographer the heads up on the insane request.  It's good to know that I am not being a control freak and that she is indeed being rude. Thanks again!
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