Community› Local Wedding Boards› New York-New York City
New York-New York City
New Discussion

Feeling weird about changing your name?

metalkpmetalkp
10 Comments
in New York-New York City
I have dreamed about having a new name for most of my life because I hate my last name. And my fiance's name is great. But now that it's finally here, I have to admit to feeling a little apprehensive and even sad about changing it. I mean your name is like your identity, and you've had it your whole life. It just feels so weird to suddenly be called something else. I have to admit I've even considered not changing it, which I never ever thought I'd say because I've been talking about changing it for so long (in principle I'm a strong believer in keeping your own name). I'm still going to do it though. Just wondering if everybody goes through this. 
image
Report Reply to Post

Re: Feeling weird about changing your name?

  • slbriz34slbriz34
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I always get a little pang when he does something stupid and I think to myself, "now we are going to have the same name? what am I thinking?"  lol I don't plan on giving my name away entirely; I'm just adding his to mine and will use his for family purposes but for work I will keep with my own.  In that way, I get to feel and be myself when it matters but also feel identified to my new family at the same time.
    Report Reply
  • soon2beweincraft!soon2beweincraft! member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If had really liked my husband's last name I would have taken.. but I wasnt really into it, so we came to a really just compromise, we are both changing our last name to a name that we made up combining both our last names together.  We plan to do it when my passport expires in march..I know very romantic!
    Report Reply
  • MrsKocalMrsKocal member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Soon2be - when I was going through the name change thing, we realized we could combine our last names and become the Bifocals.  Ha!!  I changed my name legally, but professionally I use my maiden name as my middle name (no hyphen).  I do this because I went to law school (the same school that I now work at ) and was admitted to the bar under my maiden name, so I don't want to drop it completely!  I want people who knew me professionally as my maiden name to still know they are dealing with the same person!But personally, and legally, it's just his name.
    imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker imageimage
    Report Reply
  • soon2beweincraft!soon2beweincraft! member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    hahha..bifocal is awesome!  we will become the weincrafts... weinberg is my last name and craft is his.. so it was a happy marriage of namesI think you like the name and want to do it ~ you will get used to it.  I also personally do think it is nice to have a family name ~ for when you have kids it makes it all a lot easier, but that is just my opinion
    Report Reply
  • gorjushgorjush member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Mrs Kocal i have the same issue- i've worked in the fashion industry for so long and people know me by my maiden name. so although i changed my name legally, i keep my maiden name for business purposes. i actually HATED changing my name- i used to tease DH about his last name when we were dating. i guess we all know what happened! lol!
    Report Reply
  • moonlitmamamoonlitmama member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    in theory - not at all crazy about a woman changing her name just because 'thats what a woman does'. i always wanted to change my name simply because i was teased for it growing up. fl got teased for his name too, so changing my name in this case will not be an 'improvement'. i really want to combine our last names like soon2b is, but i know his family would make a fuss about it - BIGTIME. so we might just keep our own. but i do like the idea that if you start a new life together - you proceed on equal ground with a new name that is a part of both of you - not just one person having to make all the changes, seems fair to me.
    Report Reply
  • lizdalizda member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am so happy to see this post- metalkp, I have the SAME EXACT feelings as you. I think that I am going to do what many others have suggested, keep my maiden name as my professional name, but go by his name in all other respects. it made me feel so much better to see this post and all the responses- thanks!!
    Report Reply
  • DandT1206DandT1206 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I must be in the minority.  I can't wait to change my name.  I like my maiden name, but it always gets spelled incorrectly.  Plus I like my fiance's last name.  I have no problem changing it.  Except I'll probably be cursing the name out when I have to change my license, social security, credit cards, etc.  lol
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards