Sibling Delima

mrstarawalsh · September 2009

Long story short: my H has one sister who I'm super close with. I have 3 sisters and 2 brothers. I really want my SIL to be a part of our vow renewal as a "brides maid" but I don't want a crap ton of bridesmaids. As I said I'm really close with my SIL, she's the godmother of our child, has helped me through tons of crap. I mean I'm closer to her than my other siblings. How do I encorperate all my siblings into the ceremony/ after without making them bridesmaids?

winowedding · September 2009

If you aren't close with them, are you worried about hurting their feelings? If you just want to include them, but not have them be in the WP, you could ask them to be ushers or ask a couple of them to do readings.

Brie2010 · September 2009

Delima? "Brides maid"? encorporeate?Head is spinning.

wadingmoose · September 2009

If it's a vow renewal, do you need bridesmaids? Other things you could have them do: Readings. Be a guest.

Nebb · September 2009

Explain this vow renewal please, you were married already when?

ac_in_dc · September 2009

Just have her be your MOH and don't ask any of your sisters.I think if you ask some of your sisters but not others there may be hurt feelings.Although if she's already your kid's godmother, do you really need to honor her again? B/c these things are all honorary, they don't mean much in a practical sense.

wadingmoose · September 2009

And why would you try to de-lime your siblings. That kinda sounds painful

georgia_bride09 · September 2009

From her bio:"Me and my husband were originaly married June 5, 2005."So you're having a 5-yr vow renewal? Why?

mandapanda78 · September 2009

Dammit, Wading! You made me snort.

georgia_bride09 · September 2009

Also, how old are you and how old is your husband?

[Deleted User] · September 2009

I have been wondering about this vow renewal for a week or so. It looks like you had a big wedding, so why the renewal so soon?

Nebb · September 2009

Did you have these ladies as bridesmaids at that wedding? Why do you need them now? Why are you doing a 5yr vow renewal?

wadingmoose · September 2009

I also fail to understand the "garden theme" you have outlined in your profile. Or is this where the de-liming occurs?Is dirt going to figure prominently in your vow renewal?

cmhershey · September 2009

Why do you need a bridesmaid for a vow renewal?

ffmaid · September 2009

I think that bridal parties for a vow renewal are silly as you are basically asking folks to spend money on soecific attire for a meaningless day when theyare already coming to the party for a meaningless day. I also think vow renewals for under 50 years is a sign taht you did not take your first vow seriously and that one or both cheated. That said even if this was really a weding it is always your choice but before you make that choice you shoudl consider teh long term reprecussions of not including your family at the same level of his and what hurt feelings and reprcussins of those hurt feeling may be. Then make your choice and live with your choice.

lpstl · September 2009

Arrrrgh!It's 'My husband and I'. 'Me' doesn't do anything. I'm fine with your 5 year vow renewal, just be nice to the english language.

scoetto · September 2009

Have them do readings during the ceremony or a toast at the reception. Not everybody needs to be a bridesmaid.

georgia_bride09 · September 2009

She's gone. We're bad at validation.

ffmaid · September 2009

Actually since you are not a bride but a matron you could call her a matronmaid.

vicmo5 · September 2009

Your siblings will most likely appreciate not having a role in your vow renewal. I know that if one of my siblings was doing a vow renewal after 5 years I would go, but I would think it was weird and awkward and wouldn't care to be a part of it. Perhaps that's just me though.

Nebb · September 2009

Thats pretty rude to post and run like that.

MeaghanandMichael · September 2009

Delima? "Brides maid"? encorporeate?Head is spinning.*Snorts*Vow renewals are between your husband and you in my opinion. It is not another parade of bms and all things weddingish. Just skip the bms (maybe have just one attendant) and focus on other things like food, booze and vows.

scoetto · September 2009

Actually since you are not a bride but a matron you could call her a matronmaid.HA!

fangsiting · September 2009

What does your family think of your do-over wedding? I was the MOH at my sister's wedding in June and if she throws another "wedding" in 2014, I do not want to be part of that. It's cute to have a vow renewal after 50 years, but weird after only 5. It's asking a lot for your family to even attend again, especially if they are from out of town.

mrstarawalsh · September 2009

Sorry didn't mean to post and run. And I'm also sorry that I can't spell my way out of a paper bag, no spell check on my browser

. To answer questions: 1. We didn't have a big wedding the first time. In fact, we eloped, no one was there, and my family was very hurt. Our families, my mom especially, are excited that we are renewing our vows and that we want them to share in this day with us. 2. Yes, of course I'm afraid I'd offend my sisters. We may not be close but I love them. 3. The word "bridesmaids" was in quotations because we're not having a traditional ceremony. My husband doesn't want bridesmaids or groomsmen either, we're having a handbinding ceremony and for lack of a better word I used the term bridesmaid b/c we would like my SIL to be apart of the actual ceremony. You know I'd certainly hope that someone who had a huge wedding wouldn't renew their vows after 5 years. However, we did not have a large wedding the first time and we aren't having a big renewal this time either. We're expecting no more than our closest friends and family. Thank you so much for the alternate suggestions!

SarahSmile23 · September 2009

Great attitude in your response, Tara!

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