How High Church is too High Church

diehld · September 2011

Our ceremony written out is six pages long! I am willing to post it and get opinions! Please tell me if I should!

iamjoesgurl · September 2011

What do you mean by your subject? (I'm just a bit confused)

If you read it out loud, how long does it take? I don't think 6 pages is too much. I went to a wedding where the brother of the bride read a 5 or 6 page toast. THAT was too much. But for a ceremony, it seems fine.

sprtychick10 · September 2011

I like Lisa's suggestion....read it out loud and see how long it takes

diehld · September 2011

By High Church I mean its very formal... think Royal wedding... its always been my dream to have a longer ceremony... I think its important to have full body communion (everybody can particpate) And FI and I love hymns so we are singing about 4 different hymns at different times... Its just that Saturday I went to a wedding where it took 5 minutes... pretty much do you, yep... do you, yep... And it just seemed like God wasn't even envovled... but do you think an hour to an hour and a half is to long?

DramaGeek · September 2011

I know that Catholic weddings are usually an hour with full mass...and they're long. Too long, in my opinion. Our ceremony was about 45 minutes I think and in retrospect I think even that was too long. Can you post your ceremony for us to see?

drama1308 · September 2011

I think you should post your ceremony so we can see if it actually its very long.

FaithCaitlin · September 2011

Either post it or read it aloud and time yourself.

I'm all about short ceremonies! Haha!

sprtychick10 · September 2011

how long does your FI want your ceremony to be?

fpaemp2011 · September 2011

Our total ceremony was about 50 minutes, from processional to recessional. We did "break it up" with the slideshow, Cord of 3 Strands, and signing the Covenant, so it wasn't just talking/preaching.

mrandmrsbrist · September 2011

I don't know how long our ceremony was, but it didn't seem too long. We essentially had an opening prayer, two "messages", a reading, and the vows and we were done. So maybe a half hour?

I think the idea of having a longer ceremony so that it will seem like God's involved is a silly one. God is involved in the 5 minute ceremonies and the hour long ceremonies. You just have to make Him involved.

SoonToBeGenao · September 2011

We're having the processional, intentions, 1 reading, worship song, another reading, small sermon, vows, rings, unity candle, communion for everyone, kiss and recessional. I expect it to be about 45 mins long.

azdancer8 · September 2011

Another thing to think about is how much you'll be standing in front, and whether you'll be nervous. Even 45 minutes seems pretty long to me. I think our ceremony was about a half hour, and I wouldn't have wanted to have all the attention on me much longer than that.

ElisabethJoanne · September 2011

I'm expecting my Anglican Nuptial High Solemn Mass to be over an hour. My parish (1/3 to 1/2 the guests) will love it - and so very much deserves to see the church full, with a joyful, young couple getting married. Immediate families have been warned, with the explanation, "It's what Elisabeth's church requires." They're adults. If they want to just sit for the Mass, that's fine, and they can handle sitting awkwardly for an hour. My family are Christians, so they'll probably sit/stand/kneel like the parishioners and my Catholic friends.

Here's most of the first half of our ceremony:
http://justus.anglican.org/resources/bcp/1928/Marriage.htm

ElisabethJoanne · September 2011

Oh, and to answer the meta-question, "How high church is too high church?" It's too high church when even those who don't claim to be allergic to incense are coughing.

DramaGeek · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_high-church-high-church?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:d5417ed8-fa6b-452b-a23e-bbb1621daebdPost:4bb1d955-d112-4d8e-8322-d72384e55b9f">Re: How High Church is too High Church</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh, and to answer the meta-question, "How high church is too high church?" It's too high church when even those who don't claim to be allergic to incense are coughing.
Posted by ElisabethJoanne[/QUOTE]

bwahahaha! Love that!

Our 45 minute ceremony didn't bother me at the time, and it didn't even seem that long. It wasn't until we watched the video that I realized how long it was. In the end, you have to decide what is right for you guys and reflects you and the commitment you're making the best.

diehld · September 2011

Gathering

Hymn 475

(Raise of Arms so people will stand)

Dani’s Hymn 707 to be sang 1^st verse

Greeting

Friends we are gathered together in the sight of God to witness and bless the joining together of Danielle Nicole and John Derrick in Christian Marriage.

The covenant of marriage was established by God, who created us Male and Female for each other.

Wih his presence and power Jesus Graced a wedding at Cana of Galilee, and in his sacrificial love gave us the example for the love of husband and wife.

Dani and J.D. come to give themselves to one another in this holy covenant.

( Motion for People to be seated )

Presentation

Who presents this woman to be married to this Man?

(Coleen, Pat, John Walker ) respond with We do

Vail is lifted off and those three are seated.

Declaration of Intention

I ask you now, in the presence of God and these people, to declare you intention to enter into union with each other through the grace of Jesus Christ, who calls you into union with himself as acknowledged in your baptism.

Dirk to Dani

Danielle Nicole, will you have John Derrick to be your husband, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?

Dani

I will

Dirk to J.D.

John Derrick, will you have Danielle Nicole to be your wife, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?

J.D.

I will

Response of the Families and People

The marriage of J.D. and Dani unites their families and creates a new one. They ask for your blessing.

(Ask for all family to rise)

Do you who represent their families rejoice in their union and pray God’s blessing upon them?

Families

We do

(Families sit)

Asked to whole congregation

Will all of you, by God’s grace, do everything to in your power to uphold and care for these to persons in their marriage?

People

We will

Prayer

The lord be with you

And also with you.

Let us pray.

God of all peoples, you are the true light illuming everyone. You show us the way, the truth, and the life. You love us even when are disobedient. You sustain us with your Holy Spirit. We rejoice in your life in the midst of our lives. We praise you for your presence with us. And especially in this act of solemn covenant; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen

Scripture Lessons

Song of Solomon 2:10-14, 16a; 8:6-7a

My beloved spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, come with me.   See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come,  the cooing of doves is heard in our land. The fig tree forms its early fruit; the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.  Arise, come, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.” My dove in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places on the mountainside,  show me your face, let me hear your voice;  for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely. Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm;  for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.  It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away.

1 Peter 3 1-7

Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

Hymn sing

451 Be Thou My Vision

Canticle of Love (646) could be sang with response

Kaylee Stoops : Let love be genuine and live in harmony;

hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good.

Outdo one another in showing honor;

be humble and never conceited.

C: Love is stronger than death

and jealousy is cruel as the grave.

Floods cannot drown love

and wealth cannot buy it.

Kaylee: Put love above all else;

let Christ's peace rule your hearts.

Always be forgiving,

as Christ has forgiven you.

C: Love is not jealous or boastful,

arrogant, rude or stubborn,

irritable, resentful or possessive.

Love is patient and kind.

Kaylee: Do not love in word or speech only;

love also in deed and truth.

Receive each other in sincerity,

find mercy and grow old together.

C: Love rejoices in the right;

it bears, believes, hopes

and endures all things,

for love is faithful and endless.

Kaylee: When the Lord builds the house,

the labor is never in vain.

C: Happy are those who take refuge in God;

those who serve the Lord are redeemed.

Kaylee: This is my comandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.

C: And two shall become one in love, for we are members of Christ's body.

Sermon

Dirk prays leads into Intercessory prayer

Eternal God, Creator and Preserver of all life, Author of salvation, giver of all grace: Bless and Sanctify with your Holy Spirit J.D. and Dani, who come now to join in marriage Grant that they may give their vows to each other in the strength of your steadfast love. Enable them to grow in love and peace with you and with one another all their days, that they may reach out in concern and service to the world; through Jesus Christ our Lord Amen

Exchange of Vows

J.D. To Dani

In the name of God,

I, John Derrick, take you, Danielle Nicole, to be my wife,

to have and to hold

from this day forward,

for better, for worse,

for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health,

to love and to cherish,

to give and to receive,

to speak and to listen,

to inspire and to respond,

and in all our life together

to be loyal to you with my whole being,

as long as we both shall live.

This is my solemn vow.

Dani to J.D.

In the name of God,

I, Danielle Nicole, take you, John Derrick,

to be my husband,

to have and to hold

from this day forward,

for better, for worse,

for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health,

to love and to cherish,

to give and to receive,

to speak and to listen,

to inspire and to respond,

and in all our life together

to be loyal to you with my whole being,

as long as we both shall live.

This is my solemn vow.

Blessing and Exchange of Rings

These rings are the outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace, signifying to us the union between Jesus Christ, his Church and the uniting of J.D. and Dani in holy marriage.

Bless, O Lord, the giving of these rings that they who wear them may live in your peace and continue in your favor all the days of their life; through Jesus Christ our Lord Amen

Dani

J.D., I give you this ring

as a sign of my vow,

and with all that I am,

and all that I have,

I honor you;

in the name of the Father,

and of the Son

and of the Holy Spirit.

J.D.

Dani I, give you this ring

as a sign of my vow,

and with all that I am,

and all that I have,

I honor you;

in the name of the Father,

and of the Son

and of the Holy Spirit.

Lighting the Unity Candle~ Love never fails Brandon Heath would prefer to hear lyrics…

Communion Musical setting A

Kaylee, Christy, Alex and Ross bring elements forward

While Communion is served Hymns 645, 408, 643 maybe played or Dani will select which verses will be sang aloud

Order~ The great thanksgiving, The Lords prayer using Sins, Breaking the Bread, Giving of the bread and Cup, Dirk serves Bread With J.D. serving the Right side and Dani on the Left.

Eternal God, we give you thanks that you have brought Dani and J.D. and their families and friends together at the table of your family. Help them to grow in love and unity, that they may rejoice together all the days of their lives and in the wedding feast of heaven. Grant this through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amem

Declaration of Marriage

(J.D. and Dani Join Hands)

You have declared your consent and vows before God and this congregation. May God confirm your Covenant and fill you both with grace.

Now that J.D. and Dani have given themselves to each other by solemn vows, with the joining of hands, the giving and receiving of rings, I announce to you that they are husband and wife; in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, Thoes whom God has joined together let no one put asunder. Amen

Doxology sang

Blessing of the marriage

(Dani and J.D. kneel. Dirk places his hands on their heads)

O God, you have so consecrated the covenant of Christian marriage that in it is represented the covenant between Christ and his Church. Send therefore your blessing upon J.D. and Dani, that they may surely keep their marriage covenant, and so grow in love and godliness together that their home may be a haven of blessing and peace through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen

(Dani and J.D. stand)

Dismissal with Blessing

God the Eternal keep you in love with each other, so that the peace of Christ may abide in your home. Go to serve God and your neighbor in all that you do.

Bear witness to the love of God in this world, so that those to whom love is a stranger will find in you generous friends. The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Spirit be with you all. Amen

The Peace

The peace of the Lord be with you always.

And also with you.

Thanks be to God

J.D. You may kiss your Bride!(or something like that!)

Going Forth

Hymn 384 Sung while the wedding party leaves

ElisabethJoanne · September 2011

The rings are the matter for marriage? Hadn't learned that yet.

Obviously, I'm not going to tell you that's too long. It's just slightly longer than the link I posted to, and that link is only for the first half of our service. Following the Matrimony rite we'll have a full Mass/Communion/Eucharist.

Our rites are 500+ years old. Anyone who has a problem with them can take it up with someone with a long bow or broadsword like they used back then.

DramaGeek · September 2011

I think you're fine. Are you Catholic and I missed that somehow? If not, it's pretty impressive that you basically hit the Catholic ceremony on the nose with that service!

The only thing I'd say is make sure you have enough servers (? what's the actual term??) for the eucharist. Otherwise communion will take for.ev.er. Also, if you have a lot of people who aren't Catholic, be sure to have the priest explain what they should be doing at that time (remain seated or receive a blessing) as well as explain to everyone the order. If you keep communion orderly it can go really quickly even with a lot of people. We used to do it for 800 at my school in 10-15 minutes.

ElisabethJoanne · September 2011

I think it's Episcopalian. "Outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace" is straight from the Book of Common Prayer. The BCP is from older Roman Catholic sources, of course, but a google search shows me that particular phrasing is Anglican.

OP, I didn't see you had Communion in there. Doesn't change my mind, of course.

diehld · September 2011

I'm United Methodist. But my FI and I are very traditonal so thats why our ceremony looks the way it does... its from our book of worship but I tweeked it... I felt certain things should go before others...

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