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When did weddings stop being fun?

bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
in Wedding Party
All people post about are how stressed the wedding is, how it's straining their relationships, how it's just too overwhelming. A wedding is a happy occasion! It's supposed to be fun! Fun and happy means no stress! If it's fun and you're happy, it WILL be perfect! How did we get to this point?
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"I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

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Re: When did weddings stop being fun?

  • lissa71679lissa71679
    First Comment
    It just seems like EVERYONE has an opinion of how your wedding should be and isnt afraid of voicing that opinion.
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  • ricksangricksang member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    I have no idea. I roll my eyes HARD when brides say, "ZOMG this is so stressful." Why not go to the JOP if planning is causing you this much stress? 
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  • ricksangricksang member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    It just seems like EVERYONE has an opinion of how your wedding should be and isnt afraid of voicing that opinion. Ignore them or tell them to STFU in a nice way.  
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I think the wedding industry bares some responsibility in this.  If you don't have all these megabuck details your wedding wont' be perfect.  If your wedding isn't perfect, your life is doomed.  I hate the wedding industry.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Hey bablingbrooke - I sent knot annie and email a couple of weeks ago about being the mod on the prewedding parties board and mentioned you might also be interested.  Have heard nada from her.  Have you?
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  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I have no idea. I went into it fully convinced that something was going to go wrong, so I was prepared for it when it did. Did I stress a little? Of course. Did it completely disrupt my life? No. PSA to future brides: Lower your expectations. You will live a much happier life.
    Holy Crap. We survived the first year!
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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    You know how we dealt with the 4,304,310 opinions we got? We let other people plan it the way they wanted. The flowers, the cake, the centerpieces, everything. It just didn't matter to us and we just wanted our wedding to be fun. If we fought the details, it wouldn't be fun. Both moms (who gave all the opinions) have great taste so we just let them run w/ it. Other things we just left up to the vendors--they know their business, they've done 1,000 weddings, they get paid to do what they do for a reason. It was perfect. I highly recommend. People were horrified that I didn't pick out my own bouquet, or that the DOC planned all the centerpieces and the menu, or that we didn't even pick our own first dance song. It wasn't a problem. Having all our friends and family there, all of them having a wonderful time, made it perfect. Corny but so true.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    You know kmm I haven't even sent the email. Thanks for reminding me.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    No problem.  Maybe if she gets it from you too, we will hear something.
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  • duckie1905duckie1905 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    I had a blast planning my wedding.  Moving stressed me out more than wedding planning.It is only as difficult as you make it and some women aren't happy unless they are freaking out about something.
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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Alright, I sent it.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    I second kmm's thoughts.  As soon as I read your post, my immediate thought was that I blame "Whose Wedding is it Anyway?", "Martha Stewart wedding", Bride's magazine, The Knot, "Say Yes to the Dress", "Bridezillas" and every other shill of the mega bloated wedding industry.Whose wedding shows brides, along with a wedding planner, or course (because it's just to hard to pick out flowers yourself, I guess) getting crazed over EVERY FREAKIN' detail.Of course they show that.  Where's the show in a story about a competent bride and groom who make their own decisions, enjoy the planning process, and don't melt down when the boutennieres for the men in the WP are yellow roses instead of white lily of the valley.My advice to brides:  get rid of every industry driven periodical, tv show, video, and website, and plan a wedding.  The industry causes everyone to constantly second guess themselves, and feel that they MUST be unique, clever, memorable, creative, timeless, classic, and personal.Both of our kids who have had weddings used the "once we like something, we're done with that detail" method.  They found a reception venue they liked:  put down the deposit and stop looking.  Girls found a dress they liked:  put down the deposit and stop looking.  Make a decision, and then own that decision.  It's the constant second guessing that makes people crazy.  Our kids had little to no "stress" in their planning.  Some glitches, sure-but meltdown inducing silliness?  Nope.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • peachkinspeachkins
    First Comment
    I'll admit it- I've been pretty stressed very recently.  But it's more a time-management thing than anything- it just seems like all the things I've been planning for the last year all have to be finalized in the next two weeks, and it's just finding times to make all the appointments around my work schedule.  Add to that the fact that we just moved FI into our new apartment, and I'm going to be moving in in the next couple of weeks.  However, up until the last month or so, it was smooth sailing. 
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  • BelhurstBrideBelhurstBride member
    First Comment
    I had a blast planning my wedding and would love to do it all over again. Then again, I had realistic expectations of what I could do with my budget and didn't feel like I had to compete with what I saw on television.
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  • szjonesszjones
    First Comment
    it stopped being fun when we spent twice the money I wanted and had twice the people, and a much more traditional wedding.... because I felt the FI should have a say :)
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    suze:  you didn't feel that your Fiance should have a say in his own wedding?
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • lissa71679lissa71679
    First Comment
    we had to get a bigger venue because my FI family is bigger....it didnt stress me out...it just how it had to be
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  • alison1209alison1209 member
    First Comment
    I'm amazed at the people who post that are all stressed too and I feel sorry for anyone who isn't truly enjoying this time in their lives. I watch "bridezillas" and it makes me sad how almost all of them just want it to be over! I have totally loved planning my wedding!!! My mom and I are having the best time figuring everything out and working out the details. I can't wait to see it all come together in a few months!
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  • HawaiianTXbrideHawaiianTXbride member
    First Comment
    Yes, it is a happy occasion! Honestly, I haven't spent that much time watching those shows or even reading the magazines. I find myself stressed because though I've attedned LOTS of weddings, I've never planned one. And there are just SO many choices out there! I've had a wonderful time going through everything, though. I think it's perfectly normal for someone to feel stressed, it's how they handle the stress that makes a difference. Just remember to breathe, eat good food, work out the stress, and then tackle things one at a time. It's also been fun checking things off the list.
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  • una_amiguitauna_amiguita member
    First Comment
    That is the same thing i keep asking!!!!!
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  • Julia O'BrienJulia O'Brien
    First Comment
    I'm having a blast planning my wedding.. A few members of my bridal party are sensitive for personal reasons, but I decided to stop worrying about fixing their persoanl lives and just be happy myself. Not that I'm trying to be a jerk, but at some point you've got to just let go and celebrate all the things that are awesome about this process. Things I'm loving? The creative process in general.. all the DIY I get to do, the bonding time I'm having with my Mom and Grandma.. the family that will be joining us from overseas and spending the holiday with (we've never been able to all celebrate Christmas together) And most of all the part where I get to marry my best friend! (by the way, he helped me glue together all of our invitations recently and they looked lovely {some were a little crooked, but they were full of love} - he's been so happy to do wedding things together, it makes the process so much more enjoyable)So I cannot agree that weddings are stressful.. I'm loving this entire process! :)
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  • paula2131paula2131 member
    First Comment
    Because girls buy into everything the nuptial industrial complex (including this site) says you have to have.  I just got back from a wedding where the bride had another set of BMs jewelry FedEx'd to her house the morning of the wedding - and it was hideous, cheap crap that poor girl will never wear again.  And when you get emails saying "you have 846 things on your checklist," it can be a little overwhelming.  It's awful, really.  It's hard to even want to be a guest anymore... I love my friends and I'm happy for all of them but I've had enough of crappy food (that I know they paid a fortune for), tacky ballrooms, and cheap hotels.  Thank god for my friends and alcohol.
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  • melishka716melishka716 member
    First Comment
    It's only as hard as you make it.Some girls want every last detail to go as planned, but in reality, murphy's law takes effect. The industry is to blame. They try to show people how it's supposed to be done, but don't stop and take every personality and budget into consideration.What did DH and I do? We called around and met with vendors. Once we found one we liked, we would cancel the other appointment, if any, and the only time we went to them was to make deposits or if we were needing to discuss an order of events or something.Sure, I was glad when it was all over, but that was because I had "children" for a BP who kept trying to drag me into their disputes.
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  • AdelaCAdelaC member
    First Comment
    Hey Babbling... I think your post is a little insensitive. I'm happy for you that your wedding was stress-free and went smoothly...not all weddings are the same. (Just like not all families are the same) When you have family member that does not get a long (and if I remember correctly...don't you have the difficult sister?) it really takes a toll on your mental health at times. Again, if you are the type that can say "screw off, I'm doing what I want", kudos to you. However, not everyone has that luxory or personality. My wedding plans has driven me to tears on several occasions. My mom (I love her) has used this opportunity to discuss divorce with my father to myself and my sisters. My father has refused to provide a guest list, and won't talk things out with my mom.I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to walk over to the JOP and then host a dinner for my closest friends, but I am not going to do this. Why? Because my rational fiance has listened to me, hugged me, and then said....10-20-30 years from now we will look back and be grateful for all those that attended our wedding.  We will pass down pictures of our wedding to our grandchildren (my grandparent's eloped). Those that are closest to us and support us will be elated to be there on our day. I love him!So yes, getting married is wonderful, and I think I am such a lucky woman to marry this man.  However, planning a wedding isn't number 1 on my fun list when your family is hanging on by a thread. Goodluck to all the ladies that aren't stressed out over cotton candy pink vs princess pink, but want to share this moment with everyone!
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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    My post isn't insensitive. You are overly sensitive.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    And if you'd actually read the post you'd see that I was talking more about how brides work themselves into a tizzy over shades of peach rather than family problems.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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  • AdelaCAdelaC member
    First Comment
    Hey Babbling... I think knot rules say that you cannot call me sensitve...rather you can talk about my post.... You've been around long enough to know that one!
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  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    If you want to get into semantics, I'm actually describing your behaviour, which is overly-sensitive.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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