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would you accept.....

a wedding gift from someone you didn't invite?background~ DH's uncles ex-wife.....so...DH's ex-aunt.. they were married for 20 some odd years...DH had a good relationship with her....uncle got re-married. new wife hates old wife. family drama, etc etc etc....we originally invited her (with FIL's approval), but when the family (aunts and uncles) found out, we were told to un-invite her...(some may remember this story.....).either way...she sent us a card, and a check. WWYD?
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Re: would you accept.....

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    carrieoz_76carrieoz_76 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes.She must have sent you the card and check because she cares about you and isn't so pissed that she was un-invited (or understands and accepts/forgives).  I think it's very kind of her, and it'd be rude not to accept.  Just write a really really nice response to thank her, and be as gracious as possible in it.
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    edited December 2011
    Yes, I would accept the gift.  I have my co worker a wedding gift recently and wasn't invited to his wedding and never expected to be.  I agree with PP-write a very gracious thank you card.  It's a really nice gesture for them to give a gift and not be invited to the wedding.
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    dmw_2010dmw_2010 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes! I've actually done this - I've had a few friends from college that I'm not in frequent touch with, so I wasn't on their guest list. But I wanted to do something for their wedding so I sent them a gift anyway. It's coming from a good place, so just be happy that she's happy enough for you to do something nice.
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    melissa82melissa82 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Unless you want to be rude/want to make it clear you want no part of her in your life, it's only right accept the gift.Gifts and invitations have no relationship to each other. It's perfectly OK to accept a gift from someone not invited to the wedding beforehand as well (which I think is a bit more awkward, as the person may not know).
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    edited December 2011
    I would accept it and from what I recall, if DH still has a good relationship with her, I might even consider inviting her over for dinner as a sort of thank you.  If you want, you could do so after you get your pics and album together so she can see the pics if she would like to.  It sounds like she understands why she wasn't invited and that was a very sweet gesture.
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